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Why Eva Mendes Doesn't Share New Photos of Herself and Ryan Gosling on Instagram


Eva Mendes just won best celebrity/fan interaction of the week on Instagram.

After posting a photo of herself on March 3 wearing a pretty floral dress and trench coat (from a campaign she did for her collection at New York & Company), the actor stuck around to respond to fans in the comments section. Usually, that’s a terrible idea, but in this case, Mendes had some pretty awesome conversations with her followers.

There was a lengthy response to one fan’s comment that I’d like to delve into, specifically. “You look amazing, Eva,” user @mandica17 began with a heart-eye emoji. “Just wanted to say how much it means to us fans to be able to talk to you and how great [it] is that unlike many other celebrities you acknowledge us. So thank you! P.s. wouldn’t mind an [appearence] by Ryan on this page.”

Eva Mendes met her partner, Ryan Gosling, on the set of their movie The Place Beyond the Pines in 2011, and they’ve been together ever since. They have two children together: Their first daughter, Esmeralda, was born in 2014, and two years later, they had another daughter, Amada. They rarely discuss each other or their kids with the media, but they’ve given us a bit of info here and there…as a treat.

A rare photo of the couple out on the town in 2017.

Robert Kamau

In her response to @mandica17, Mendes opened up about her “struggle with social media” and explains why she won’t post pictures of Gosling or her children.

“I struggle with social media but I love the constant connection with women,” she wrote in her reply. “I try to post responsibly and try to make sure I don’t portray myself in a way that makes other women feel bad.”

Mendes emphasized that the campaign photo is not a completely accurate portrayal of how she looks. “Instagram can be hurtful in that way. Like with this picture, this is actually a campaign shot and it was retouched. So I want women to know that,” she said. “I want women to know it takes a lot for me to look this way and that I struggle with food among many other things.”

After calling on her fans to call her out for “any bullshit,” she got to the stuff about her partner. “As far as Ryan, I’ll only post flashbacks of things that are already ‘out there’ (like pics from movies we did or stuff like that),” she explained. “My man and kids are private. That’s important to me so thanks for getting that. Have a beautiful day. Sending so much love!” She finished her response with a heart emoji.

Eve Mendes on Instagram
Instagram/Eva Mendes

If only every comments section could looked like this!





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Inside the Secret Sisterhood of Women Who Share a Sperm Donor


It hasn’t been all happy selfies and late-night talks over bottles of wine. We have different parenting styles and didn’t always agree on how much to tell the kids, or what language to use (brother and sister? donor sibling? special friend?), especially given the varied ages of our brood (two to nine, at our first big reunion). There was a long stretch when I couldn’t shake the feeling that Emily, earth mother extraordinaire—seriously, she makes her own almond butter—was kind of passive aggressive and judge-y. When Gabi and I moved from New York to Florida, in part so we could be closer to Emily and Dana’s crew, we saw even less of them than in previous years. What the hell? I felt ignored and unwelcome.

I soon recognized these things for what they were—typical family tiffs, rifts and misunderstandings. When it came to the important stuff, we were there for each other. When I faced a series of agonizing spinal surgeries, the moms chipped in to fly Gabi to spend time with her siblings. And soon after our move, when hurricanes Irma and Dorian threatened Florida, we evacuated to Emily’s home in Atlanta.

Granted, this choice may not be right for everyone. I know not all donor-related parents bond the way we have. Maybe it’s because we’re all women—having dads in the mix might’ve complicated matters. The donor sibs also bear a strong resemblance to each other, which isn’t true for all such families. I found it impossible to feel nothing for these kids who look just like mine—I felt a primal tug, and that feeling seems to have extended to their moms, too. We were also each firmly committed to giving our children the gift of knowing each other. If they didn’t enjoy each other’s company—fine. The children could opt out. But at least they’d have a choice.

So far, they’ve opted in. They’re not all best friends, but they seem to enjoy a sense of solidarity. Gabi hears from her siblings regularly. Two of them attended summer camp together. “Do you really have nine brothers and sisters?” one of the other campers asked. “Yeah,” they said, and shrugged.

I have no idea what the future holds. After spending three-and-a-half hours with my daughter on lockdown in a suburban mall, I’m not sure I want to know. The reports of an “active shooter” turned out to be a false alarm but I left feeling shaky and yet incredibly blessed. Emily’s texts kept me informed and grounded, and the other moms’ check-ins after I got home helped soothe my frayed nerves.

I’m sure there are plenty of people out there who think we’re crazy to pursue this experiment. I like to believe the stars were aligned when each of us chose Donor 527. Biology connects the children, but fate brought us mothers together. The one thing I know for certain is that I couldn’t have hand-picked a better group to call family.



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Clean Skin Care Routines: 4 Women With Great Skin Share Theirs


We all have those Instagram accounts we check daily, turn post notifications on for, and refer to in conversation like they’re our actual friends. If you’ve ever scrolled onto one of these photos and wondered, How does she do it? you’re in luck. Welcome to our series Insta Stalking, in which we talk to the women behind the accounts we’re obsessing over about their beauty secrets. Below, four women with great skin share their clean skin care routines.

Thanks in part to the internet, we now have more information than ever about what we are actually putting on (and into) our bodies. As women gain awareness and interest in what’s in their products, the “clean beauty” movement has rapidly grown. While there’s nothing wrong with pushing for products that are better for us and the planet, there are so many buzzwords—clean, green, natural, organic—floating around that it’s hard to sort through the noise. Add to the fact that every retailer and brand has their own definition of the word clean, and things can get a little murky.

Generally speaking, clean beauty refers to products free of parabens, sulfates, phthalates, and artificial fragrance (again, this varies depending on who you ask), but has grown to lump products with all-natural or organic ingredients. Some also take sustainability into account. There’s also a lot misinformed stereotypes associated with clean beauty: That it’s crunchy (think more Whole Foods than Sephora), ineffective, or expensive, which can make going green intimidating. To make things a little easier, we asked four women who are passionate about clean beauty to define what it means to them, and share their clean skin care routines. Read on for the products they can’t live without.

Gabby Azorsky, 23, e-commerce sales assistant in Brooklyn

The beauty industry is fairly unregulated, so it’s important to me to use products with ingredients and from companies that I trust (I follow the EU’s standards as a guideline, which has stricter policies than the US). Sometimes I’ll use a product that isn’t “clean” for special occasions or a fun makeup look, but for daily wear, keeping it clean makes me feel like myself.

I eat colorfully, organic, and as unprocessed as possible, and think of my personal care in the same way. Eating lots of leafy greens, nourishing foods, and drinking plenty of water is the most important part of my skin care routine. Product-wise, I like to keep it simple. I have a few core products that I stick to, and then rotate or play with new products as I run out. I also generally switch out my cleanser and face oil with the seasons.





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12 Men Share Their Abortion Stories


One of the little things that starts to get to you is all the thoughts of what could have been with the baby. In your brain, you know this isn’t the right time. In your heart, you start imagining and dreaming about what could have been.

Cazembe Jackson, 39, Atlanta

I was a junior in college. It was the week before finals, and I was walking home from the library, at probably like one o’clock in the morning. These guys were riding by in a truck and saying that one of their friends had just gotten out of jail and was looking for a good time. I always have been a trans masculine person, so I was dressed in “boy” clothes. The conversation ended up being like, “We need to show you how to be a real woman.” I got raped by four men and kind of left there, outside. They call it corrective rape, when they’re raping you to make you straight.

I found out I was pregnant. I was on financial aid and basically already hustling trying to graduate, and did not want to be pregnant, did not want to have a kid. I was very suicidal and depressed. I stopped school for a little bit and went home. There was a Planned Parenthood around the corner from where I grew up, and I just went there. When I told them the story of what had happened, they set me up with a rape crisis center. That was my first time ever going to therapy. I don’t know what I would do had I not started therapy.

My abortion cost $300. I was a struggling college student. I ended up having to take out a payday loan, which cost way more than $300 and took way longer to pay back.

Women are not the only people who get abortions and who need them. There are also trans men, there are also other nonbinary or gender-nonconforming folk who don’t identify as women who also need access. It’s important that our voices are heard around abortion access.

Michael, 23, Colorado

I was on team abortion pretty much the whole time, and she was trying to think it out. I just made my case. Like, “Hey, we both really can’t afford to have this kid at all.” She was 19. I was 22 at the time.

It was so scary through the whole process. Getting the sonogram and seeing that she was actually pregnant, [I was] more sentimental than I thought I would get about it. Seeing that life that’s there, it doesn’t make it any easier than we thought it was going to be. A lot of old-school tropes really came into play, like, Are we killing this kid?

Diego, 27, Rockland County, NY

I had a serious girlfriend for a time. [Then at one point] she started acting kind of weird, distant. And looking back, I was kind of oblivious to the signs. You know, her breasts were getting bigger and she was getting nauseous and stuff like that. And then one night she just came out and said, “Hey, I had an abortion this week.” And I’m like, “Wait, what?” She thought that I just wouldn’t want to deal with it, which was not the case at all. I was pretty devastated. And I was just thinking, like, “Oh, my God. I lost my child.”

Before that moment, as a Christian, I had always had the standpoint of, like, “Yeah, abortion is wrong.” But it’s not really an issue that I was, like, clamoring for or hardcore on either way. Since then, I’ve become more knowledgeable and active in why I believe abortion is wrong, as far as what the Bible says, the arguments for pro-life and for pro-choice, and how we talk about the issue.

I’m hurt that that baby never had a chance. I’m hurt that my girlfriend thought that was the right decision to make, especially without consulting with me. Because even though America says this is a women’s issue, it’s as much a man’s issue because it takes a man and a woman to make a baby. And that’s something that we’re both going to carry the rest of our lives, the memory of what could have happened. I think about that baby—not like every day or every week—but I think about that baby a lot.

Dashiel Hitzfelder, 38, Durham, North Carolina

I felt really stupid. We know how the birds and the bees work, right? You have unprotected sex, there are consequences, and this is what happened. You put a seatbelt on when you get in a car, and if you don’t and you get in a car wreck and you get your face smashed in, those are the consequences that you live with when something really simple could have prevented it. I was just furious at myself.



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Top Curly Hair Bloggers Share the Best Products for Curls


Getting your hair to do exactly what you want it to do can be a confusing (and at times seemingly impossible) thing for everyone, but it’s especially true for women with curls. As effortless as they may look, the reality is that our curls can only be as good as the products and methods we use on them, and finding the right ones is easier said than done. To help cut through the conflicting recommendations and hundreds of products on the market, we thought: Why not do a little crowdsourcing? Here you’ll see what a handful of real women—with all different curl patterns and textures—vow as their absolute favorite curly-hair products, from buzzy creams to DIY remedies (plus a few why-didn’t-I-think-of-that tips).

All products featured on Glamour are independently selected by our editors. However, when you buy something through our retail links, we may earn an affiliate commission.



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At Romance Writers of America Conference, Attendees Share Favorite Books (and Dispel Stereotypes)


“I stole my first romance novel from my mom. She saw me reading it and freaked out, because nobody should have to explain an orgasm to a five-year-old,” remembers Seattle-based author Olivia Waite. Decades later, her interest hasn’t faded. Waite is one of around 1,900 people in attendance at the Romance Writers of America conference in New York and among her people.

RWA is the largest annual meet-up for professional romance writers in the world, and the association behind it boasts more than 9,000 members, hundreds of whom make a point to attend its signature event. Because as Alabaman writer Louisa Cornell—who has been to 12 conferences—puts it, “Being a writer can be a very lonely job, especially with romance. This genre is picked apart and looked down on. When it’s a situation where it’s a lonely business, and you’re looked down on for what you write, being able to be with your tribe is very important.”

That sense of camaraderie makes the event feel more like a Panhellenic conference than a traditional work requirement. One woman—a doctor with aquamarine hair—trekked from Toulouse, France, just to be there. In another corner, two women set up shop on the floor, and, over pizza, explained that they’d met at a previous conference and had spent the past 12 months co-writing a romance series together. Seasoned veterans were quick to spot orange ribbons on attendees’ badges, an indication it’s the wearer’s first time, to help bring them into the fold.

Tom Smarch Photography

For these women, who often experience online harassment and are subjected to crude or dismissive assessments of their work, the chance to connect with writer and fans, judgment-free, is a welcome change. “I had a friend of my sister’s ask her how I could write romance novels even though I’m single,” recalls novelist Rebecca Connolly, who had come to New York from Indiana. The comment stung, but she’s used to the criticism. “People think if you write romance novels you’re silly, you’re writing ‘mom porn,’ or you’re setting everyone up for unrealistic expectations. It’s sad because it completely belittles our craft, which we put a lot of work and heart into it.” Jen Geigle Johnson, Connolly’s Denver-based writing partner and roommate at RWA, has also experienced this. “It’s a feminist issue,” Johnson says. “Romance is viewed as a ‘women’s genre,’ which is why it’s downplayed, but the imagery can be just as beautiful as a ‘literary work,’ even though you’re writing a love story.”

It can also be life-changing. While Waite, for example, started off her reading traditional, heteronormative romance stories, she soon decided to check out queer and lesbian literature, sometimes known as F/F in the genre. “I wanted to read more inclusively across sexuality and racial lines. Then I read F/F, and it was like staring into a mirror,” Waite says. She came out as bisexual, and has dedicated herself to writing within the sub-genre. “I wanted to write F/F novels because I wasn’t seeing enough of them in stores. It feels so magical to get more queer romance voices out there, because there’s a real divide between the lesbian romance presses and the mainstream ones.”

At Romance Writers of America Conference Attendees Share Favorite Books
Tom Smarch Photography

“There are young girls who are having a tough time with abusive boyfriends, who read young adult romance and see there’s a way out. There are older ladies who are widowed and read romance about women their age and realize there’s happiness still out there,” Cornell adds. “I wish people knew how much people’s lives are saved by these novels. Because there’s nothing better than laughing at a romantic comedy who’s just as clumsy, or spunky, as you are.”

Ready to dive into the happy endings? Read on for some of the RWA members’ favorite romance novels of all-time.



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