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Can We Please Stop Talking About Weight Loss During a Pandemic?


“Due to coronavirus, my summer body will be postponed until 2021.” Usually this kind of garbage only hits my feed when Jameela Jamil is ranting about #teatox. I’ve worked hard to unfollow any content that’s generally annoying or makes me feel like shit. But since the government issued its guidelines to shelter in place, there’s been a particularly insidious undertone to the posts popping up that I just can’t shake.

Despite the fact we’re going through an unprecedented health crisis, the prevailing message on social media right now is that we’re somehow supposed to be “making the most” of our time spent indoors. Write that novel! Organize your closet! Bake bread! Get quarantine fit!

Now, I don’t blame anyone for taking up a new hobby in order to distract themselves. You can only have so many conversations with your cat until you begin to feel completely deranged. But that last one—the idea that we should be using all this “extra time” to lose weight, or at least not gain any—moves beyond feeling productive and gives into a societal fear I thought we were moving past: Getting “fat.”

The collective fat panic I’ve seen as I scroll through social media is, frankly, appalling. “So will the producers of 600-Pound Life just find me or…” reads one meme that’s surfaced more times than I can count. A photo of Barbie next to a heavier “Carbie” (get it? She ate too much during quarantine? LOL!) has more than 120,000 likes on @girlwithnojob.

But it’s not just the obviously offensive fat jokes that meme accounts and out-of-touch influencers are posting. What’s more shocking are the dozens of frantic weight gain comments—almost all masked in sarcasm or wry self-deprecation—I’ve seen close acquaintances post. These are smart women—the ones who usually rally against diet-talk and fatphobia—that are sharing photos of cookies with captions like, “Going to have to buy a size up after this” or “Looks like I won’t be wearing jeans ever again.” Eating the pasta is what you’re worried about? OK.

A small sampling of the memes going around on social media right now.

Instagram

It’s not just within my circle of friends either. An alarming amount of people, it appears, are publicly broadcasting their fear that this time indoors will cause them to gain weight.

“I’m seeing so many memes that show before COVID-19 body and after COVID-19 body, or jokes comparing ‘COVID-15’ to the Freshman 15,” says Elizabeth Denton, an L.A.-based writer. “At first I chuckled, but then I thought about what that means. Whoever posted that thinks ‘fat’ bodies are funny or something to be ridiculed.”





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Alex Rodriguez Wrote a Heartwarming Note to Jennifer Lopez After Her Golden Globes Loss


Jennifer Lopez was nominated at the Golden Globes Sunday night (January 5) for Best Supporting Actress for her performance in Hustlers. Unfortunately, she didn’t win (Laura Dern did for Marriage Story), but I have a feeling she isn’t sweating it—especially not after the sweet note her fiancé, Alex Rodriguez, posted to Instagram.

Shortly after the Golden Globes wrapped, the baseball veteran wrote this tribute to Lopez:

“Jen, it doesn’t take a trophy, medal, or plaque to identify a true champion. To millions of young women who have watched you and have been inspired and empowered to do amazing things in their lives, you are a champion. For countless musicians, dancers, actresses, and performers who have seen and emulate your passion, drive and work ethic to find their own success, you are a champion. To your children, your family, your coaches, your staff, and your extended family, you are a champion. To everyone whose lives you enrich daily, you are a champion. And don’t you ever forget it.”

See the post for yourself, below:

Instagram
Alex Rodriguez Instagram
Instagram

Of course, those who follow Alex Rodriguez and Jennifer Lopez‘s relationship closely shouldn’t be surprised by this public display of affection. He’s always showing that he’s her number-one fan—whether that’s through being the perfect Instagram fiancé on the red carpet, or just saying the most affectionate words.

“I can’t believe it’s been two years,” he wrote on Instagram in February 2019 in honor of their two-year anniversary. “Only 730 days, which have flown by, but it feels like we have been together forever. We are meant to be, and how much you mean to me cannot be put into words.” He added, “Like you there is none other. Words will never do justice to what the last two years have meant to me. Thank you for always being you, for your unwavering support and unconditional love.”





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‘Wild’ Author Cheryl Strayed Knows the Secret to Finding Love After Loss


I really, really, really, really grieved the loss of my first marriage, even though I was the one who said, “I don’t want to be married anymore. Let’s end this.” But it was a different kind of grief than the grief I had for my mom. I’ll always grieve my mom. It’ll be a loss that will always be a hard one for me. The loss of my first marriage was a temporary grief; it was a temporary loss.

There shouldn’t be this timeline for grief. I think pathologizing pain is something that our culture does quite well. You should be sad if somebody you love deeply dies. That’s a normal response to a really sad, hard thing that happened. The first [step to healing] is to accept that sorrow is real and it’s going to take some time for it to lift. And then once it does lift a bit, to accept that—to accept that that’s not a sign of your lack of love, or commitment, or dedication to that person, but that it’s really that your loss is shifting into something a little deeper, where you’re starting to say, “I realize that this thing is true. This is a fact. My dad isn’t going to reappear like a magic genie and be there in my life again, ever again,” or, “My mom isn’t.”

We have to carry it—to say that the person is gone forever, but at the same time will always be present, so that in the absence of the beloved, there is a profound presence that we can make manifest in our lives by the things we do, and live, and believe, and say.

I love my kids the same way my mother loved me, and perhaps that’s the most powerful way I’ve carried her; I’ve carried that full-throttle-wild-abandon-imperfect-but-without-any-question-it’s-there love that I got from my mom, and I give it to my kids and they carry it forward. They’ll carry it onward. She’s alive in them; she’s alive in their spirits even though they never met her.

The power of vulnerability is also truly magic. Vulnerability, I’ve become convinced, is the way to get love. And of course, many of us decide not to be vulnerable because we’re afraid. But vulnerability is the way to get love, romantic or otherwise. The minute you’re the one who says, “I’m afraid right now,” or, “I’m missing my mom,” or, “I am in the midst of a divorce,” the minute you simply say what’s true, people open themselves up to you, and they offer you consolation—an essential connection.

I think that so much of loving well is about courage. It’s about telling the truth as soon as possible, as often as you can. That’s the secret to a good life, and that’s about vulnerability. Vulnerability is simply telling the truth about who you are, as often as you can, in any given situation. And nobody said any of this was going to be easy. If you’re looking for love again, there’s just no way around the fact that you have to be vulnerable in order to connect with others. Nobody’s going to love a cardboard-box version of you. Nobody wants to feel like they’re knocking at a closed door when they’re in a relationship with you. We want the real, juicy, meaty you. We want the tender stuff on the inside.



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Lana Del Rey Calls Out Kanye West: 'Your Support of Donald Trump Is a Loss for the Culture'


Kanye West stunned many over the weekend when he went on an impromptu pro–Donald Trump rant on Saturday Night Live. The speech was captured by audience members at the venue and quickly went viral.

“The blacks want always Democrats…. You know it’s like the plan they did, to take the fathers out the home and put them on welfare…. Does anybody know about that? That’s a Democratic plan,” West said, according to The Daily Beast. “There’s so many times I talk to, like, a white person about this and they say, ‘How could you like Trump? He’s racist.’ Well, uh, if I was concerned about racism I would’ve moved out of America a long time ago.”

Shortly after his speech, West uploaded a photo of himself wearing a Make America Great Again hat to Instagram—something he’s worn before—and gave another statement in support of Trump. “This represents good and America becoming whole again,” West wrote, in reference to his hat. “We will no longer outsource to other countries. We build factories here in America and create jobs. We will provide jobs for all who are free from prisons as we abolish the Thirteenth Amendment. Message sent with love.”

The Thirteenth Amendment abolished slavery in the United States, so naturally many were troubled by West’s caption. However, he doubled down with a tweet: “The 13th Amendment is slavery in disguise,” he wrote. “Meaning it never ended. We are the solution that heals.”

Many people aren’t happy with West’s posts—including Lana Del Rey, who left a comment underneath his Instagram that challenged the rapper’s views.

“Trump becoming our president was a loss for the country, but your support of him is a loss for the culture,” she posted. “I can only assume you relate to his personality on some level. Delusions of Grandeur, extreme issues with narcissism—none of which would be a talking point if we weren’t speaking about the man leading our country.”

Del Ray continued, “If you think it’s alright to support someone who believes it’s OK to grab a woman by the pussy just because he’s famous—then you need an intervention as much as he does—something so many narcissists will never get because there just isn’t enough help for the issue. Message sent with the concern that it will never be addressed.”

Check it out Del Rey’s comment for yourself, below:

PHOTO: Instagram

Del Rey has an interesting relationship with West. She actually sang her hit “Young and Beautiful” at West’s wedding to Kim Kardashian in 2014, and prior to this, West had an orchestra play a version of the song when he proposed. West hasn’t responded to Del Rey’s comments directly, but stay tuned.

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Thanks to Kanye West, #IfSlaveryWasAChoice Is Trending on Twitter—And It’s Comedy Gold





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