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Let's Talk About the 'F' Word


The idea for our September issue began the way any great conversation with friends happens: over wine. I had recently moved from a size 10 to 12 into plus sizes and was bitching to my colleagues about the hell that was shopping now. It was the first time I’d really—honestly—opened up to anyone about my 60-pound weight gain. In the few times I had offhandedly mentioned it to people, the conversation usually went something along the lines of, “Don’t worry, you’ll lose it!” or “You look great!” Others would quickly change the subject.

Three rosés in, I admitted to my co-workers I was sick of feeling like size was a four-letter word. After months of following plus-size influencers and body-positive activists on Instagram, I was finally feeling OK with my size. These women were happy with—and proud of!—their bodies and they unabashedly discussed the challenges that came with being a plus-size woman. I wanted to be one of them. But everyone else, outside that online community I’d been lurking in, didn’t seem like they wanted to participate; either because we’ve been conditioned to think that commenting on other women’s weight—especially if it’s not weight loss—is unacceptable or because they, too, had hangups but weren’t ready to talk about them.

And so The “F” Word was born.

If you haven’t caught on, the “F” stands for fat. Yes, fat, and I don’t mean that pejoratively. Women in the body-positive space are reclaiming the term for what it is, simply an adjective that describes their physical attributes, just the way you’d talk about someone who is thin. No longer is it—or should it be—a dirty word, the other “F” word.

All week long, we’ll be digging into the various issues women have to navigate when they live in bigger bodies—starting, obviously, with fashion. It’s difficult to feel good in your body when you don’t have the clothes to express yourself the way you want to be seen, which the 40 people I spoke with for our feature titled “The Fashion Industry Has a Plus-Size Problem” will tell you all about. For three months, I sat down with models, editors, influencers, photographers, and designers to have a candid talk about the real frustrations and elations plus women have with the fashion industry as it stands today.

With each conversation, it became clear it’s not just a visibility issue with ad campaigns or a need for more shopping options in stores (although those are two vastly huge problems). The need for more plus discourse goes all the way to the top. Not just in boardrooms, where execs make calls on how to price clothing for plus-size women, a controversy we explore called the “Fat Tax,” but also with venture capital funding so more plus women can actually make the pieces we want to wear.

Speaking of cool clothes, tomorrow we’ll be unveiling our first-ever Plus-Size Fashion Awards. In an ideal world—hell, even one where designers would just like to make money—we wouldn’t have the need to celebrate brands doing plus right. But until that point, we have this shopping resource, which was expertly curated by 10 plus-size fashion experts (our awards judges) and informed by a survey more than 1,300 readers weighed in on.

Also, that term: “plus size.” As we were planning this package we had a lot of conversations around whether we should take a stand and abolish the word. Women have argued for years that it makes no sense to ostracize what is actually the majority of shoppers; 68% of women in the U.S. today wear a size 14 or above.



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‘This Is Us’ Season 3, Episode 18 Recap: Let's Talk About All the Major Reveals in the Season Finale


Caution: Spoilers for the This Is Us season three finale ahead.

The brains behind This Is Us promised a memorable season three finale, and they absolutely delivered. The episode was gut-wrenching and surprising—especially those last five minutes, which were jam-packed with new information. Seriously, my head is still spinning.

But let’s not get ahead of ourselves. Before we introduce new drama, let’s talk about how the season’s biggest storylines wrapped. After a tense fight last week about how their new jobs are affecting their marriage, Randall and Beth reached a resolution: They’re moving to Philadelphia. Randall will stay on board as a city councilman, and Beth has decided to start her own dance studio in the area. Those who thought these two were headed for divorce can breathe a sigh of relief. “We don’t work when we’re apart,” Beth says to Randall toward the end of the episode. “But together we set the world on fire.”

Unfortunately, Kevin and Zoe’s future isn’t as bright. After spending the afternoon babysitting Beth and Randall’s daughters, Zoe realized Kevin truly does want children—even if he won’t admit it. So she ends things, and their last conversation is pretty heartbreaking. “You should be a dad,” she says. “Kevin, you should raise 500 perfectly symmetrical kids. You’ll be amazing at it. And I want you to have that. I want you to have everything you want. But I don’t want that.”

Meanwhile, it’s good news for Kate and Toby: They can take Baby Jack home. He’s breathing on his own, and the doctors seem optimistic about his health. But there might be some potential friction with Rebecca, who’s moving to Los Angeles with Miguel to help Kate with the baby. They had a minor tiff at the hospital—which was resolved—but I have a feeling Kate’s not going to respond well to Rebecca’s hands-on (grand)mothering.

This all led to those aforementioned last five minutes, which were some of the most illuminating in the show’s history. That’s when everything people will be talking about tomorrow happened. Questions were answered. Mysteries were solved. But in true This Is Us fashion, we were also left with several cliffhangers. Let’s go over the biggest moments right now:

If you’ll recall, Randall wasn’t wearing a wedding ring in the flash-forward from last year, which led many people to think he and Beth were dunzo. But rejoice, “R&B” shippers: The couple is still very much together, as evidenced by the kiss Beth gives Randall in this new flash-forward, and the giant wedding ring on her finger.

NBC

This implies, at least, that he and Zoe never get back together. (She’s quite firm in her desire to not have children.) So does this mean Kevin and Sophie found their way back to each other? They did have that coffee date a few episodes back. Granted, Sophie was engaged to someone else then, but I wouldn’t put it past This Is Us to reunite these two. Of course, it’s also possible Kevin just met someone new, but that’s boring so moving on.

He’s nowhere to be found in the future, when the entire family is gathered at Kevin’s house to visit a clearly-sick Rebecca. So either he passed away, he and Rebecca broke up, or he’s just running late to the house. My money’s on the third. It wouldn’t be the first time This Is Us gave viewers premature heart attacks.

The last time we saw Jack’s very-much-alive brother was in the middle of season three, when he iced out the Pearsons after they tried to help him get sober. But he appears in the flash-forward healthy, clean-cut, and sitting by Rebecca’s side. At some point between the present and future, he obviously mended the fence with his family. And picked up a shaving kit!



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Are Kylie Jenner and Travis Scott Engaged? Let's Investigate


Put on your trench coats and tiny sunglasses, because we have a major mystery on our hands: Are Kylie Jenner and Travis Scott engaged? This is an important question, people. In fact, we haven’t had a Kardashian-Jenner case this tough to crack since late 2017, when Kylie, Khloé, and Kim were maybe all expecting children at the same time. That turned out to be true, but the jury’s still out on Travis and Kylie’s engagement status.

There’s evidence pointing in both directions, which makes solving this puzzle even more difficult. It’s like the time on Keeping Up With the Kardashians when Kim decided to wear a bunch of wigs and talk in a Southern accent. Remember when she did that? It was bizarre. No one knew why she did it—just like no one knows for sure whether Travis and Kylie are engaged. Maybe they’ll confirm when Kim finally explains why she wore all those wigs (my dream). Until then, though, let’s break down everything that suggests Kylie Jenner and Travis Scott are engaged.

This photo of a ring. Travis posted a pic of Kylie wearing a ring on that finger to his Instagram Story Sunday night (February 3) after he performed at the Super Bowl. Of course, Kylie’s worn rings before on all her fingers—like in this photo where she’s also holding a giant, old-timey crown for…reasons. A ring doesn’t 100 percent confirm an engagement, but the timing of Travis’ photo is definitely fishy.

Instagram

Everyone thought Travis would propose to Kylie at the Super Bowl. He was one of the featured acts at the halftime show, after all. Plus, Kylie upstaged the Super Bowl last year when she confirmed she’d given birth. It basically became the Kylie Bowl—and Travis performing this year suggested that could’ve happened again. (Side note: We actually need a Kylie Bowl. The first half can be assembling lip kits. The second can be seeing how many times players are able to say the phrase “realizing stuff” in 30 minutes.)

Kylie called Travis “hubby” on Instagram. And he’s called her “wifey.” Why would Kylie and Travis play these games when people freak out every time they breathe?

Travis Scott Instagram
Instagram

She also wrote “I miss my husband” in Spanish on Instagram. For two people who allegedly aren’t husband and wife, they certainly play fast and loose with the words husband and wife.

Kylie Jenner Instagram
Instagram

Travis confirmed to Rolling Stone in December that he and Kylie will get married soon. “I need her with me to operate. She’s that one,” Travis said about Kylie. “We’ll get married soon. I just gotta sturdy up—I gotta propose in a fire way.” A “fire way” like at the Super Bowl, perhaps?

But Kris Jenner low-key shot all this down. When the hosts of Australia’s Kyle and Jackie O Show asked Kris whether “wedding bells” were in the future for Travis and Kylie, she said, “Not that I know of, so if you hear something, call my cell.” That was on January 24, though, so it’s possible something’s happened between then and now.

Unfortunately, it looks like we won’t know anything conclusive until Kylie and Travis comment directly. Not to quote Kris Jenner, but:





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Let's Stop Gawking at Moms Over 40


News circulated Friday that actress Rachel Weisz, 48, is pregnant. The actress made the announcement in a profile by Maureen Dowd in The New York Times. Weisz is married to Daniel Craig; he has a 25-year-old daughter and she an 11-year-old son, both from previous relationships, but this baby is headline-worthy. There’s a special kind of rubbernecking we reserve for pregnancy past 40, and it’s tinged with judgment and fatalism.

It’s disappointing that famous women still have to be Times-profile calculated about their pregnancy announcements, and annoying that nonstop speculation about their famous bodies essentially robs them of the ability to do anything else. It’s no accident that Weisz mentions that she’ll “be showing soon” in the Dowd interview. But the way we talk about older mothers, especially—the very existence of the term “geriatric pregnancy”—always seems to take on a lurid sheen.

“People tell me I’m lucky a lot, but that’s true,” says Terry Ward, a freelance writer in Tampa who had one child at 41 and another at 42. All the same, “I was asked last week if I’m the nanny.”

The public dialogue is constantly policing the “right” way to mother, clucking its tongue at images that don’t conform. Whether that’s wondering aloud whether older mothers harm their children with their age, or a general “honey, don’t wait” attitude toward other women’s plans.

Instead of this moralizing, let’s congratulate Rachel Weisz on her happy news, and as a baby gift, desist from asking her things that are simply none of our business: How did she get pregnant? Is it even responsible for women over 40 to have babies? How will she possibly do it all, with a new baby and bustling career? Does she wish she did this sooner? Will she breastfeed exclusively for a full year? Has she thought about how she’ll lose the weight?

No, instead, I will congratulate Weisz on the good fortune of gestating in the same era as our noble regents Beyoncé and Senator Tammy Duckworth, who just became the first to cast a vote on the Senate floor with a newborn baby in tow. As a fellow parent of a newborn, I also heartily congratulate each of them on being able to get farther than a grocery store’s distance from home.

Author Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie noted after stealth-birthing her own child in 2016, “I just feel like we live in an age when women are supposed to perform pregnancy. We don’t expect fathers to perform fatherhood.” We certainly don’t expect them to reveal their news “with a radiant smile” to Maureen Dowd in order to outrun headlines about whether they’re pregnant or just fat.

The biological clock, as critic Moira Weigel notes in her book Labor of Love: The Invention of Dating, is “a story about science and sexism,” a cultural construction erected to make women feel guilty and ashamed, yet again, about their choices. No one—celebrity or civilian—owes us information about their fertility or family planning, and Weisz’s age doesn’t change that.

In fact, it’s quite the contortion we expect of women, especially those in the public eye, like her: to look 20 years younger than she is, to work all the time during her fertile years, and then to get out in front of her own late-in-life baby story. And this cultural anxiety extends far beyond Hollywood.

“I had my second kid at 41, and even though I think I look pretty good, I’ve had a few people ask (or assume!) he’s my grandchild,” says Kate Tuttle, a writer based in New Jersey. “It hurts.”

When we reduce our stories about women to public entitlement over their reproductive choices, we flatten them into tired stereotypes: Old Mom, New Mom, Good Mom, Bad Mom, Barren Witch. In the Times interview, Weisz herself argues for female complexity: “I can’t bear just really good, idealized characters.”

She also notes that, in many of the scripts she’s read, “Contradictory characters or illogical things about women are often taken out, and they’re simplified to either all good or bad and they’re never allowed to be just layered and complex.”

The gag is, it is not complex, contradictory, nor illogical for a woman to have a job and have a baby, at any age. We’ve been multitasking for millennia—stop interrupting our grinding.



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There Are Two Typos On the State of the Union Ticket, So Let's All Give Up Now


We still have 24 hours before the big show, but it appears things are already off to an iffy start for President Donald Trump’s State of the Union Address.

On Monday, photos of this year’s SOTU tickets began to surface on social media and showed they came with not one, but two embarrassing typos. Clear as day, on the blue and black tickets it invited guests to attend the “State of the Uniom” instead of Union.

“This will be the last year I go to a scalper for tickets to the ‘State of the Uniom,'” Congressman Raja Krishnamoorthi joked on Twitter.

And while certainly funny, it sort of sucks to be working in the Office of the Sergeant at Arms and Doorkeeper, as they are the ones who print and provide the tickets for spouses and guests of members of Congress. Now, they will have to reprint and reissue every ticket they gave out to ensure the right information is provided, according to CNN.

“Just received my ticket for the State of the Union. Looks like Betsy DeVos was in charge of spell checking,” Rep. Raul M. Grijalva, a Democrat from Arizona wrote in a tweet.

Even Republicans got in on the joke, with leaders like Sen. Marco Rubio tweeting about the error.

Though “Uniom” wasn’t the only error to be printed on the ticket. As Buzzfeed astutely pointed out, the ticket also refers to the “Visitor’s Gallery.” However, according to the Office of Art & Archives, it should read Visitors’ Gallery.

According to a Sergeant at Arms spokesperson, this is likely the first time State of the Union tickets have had to be reissued.

“Sometimes the colors and little details change and obviously the dates,” he told Buzzfeed. “But I don’t recall [the need to reprint due to an error] happening before.”

Related Content:
What to Expect from President Trump’s First State of the Union Address
Maxine Waters Will Follow Trump’s First State of the Union By Giving Her Own Speech
12 Things to Watch This Week (Including, Yes, the State of the Union Address)





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Ben Affleck Wants To Be Part of the Sexual Harassment 'Solution'. Let's Hope He Means It.


With holiday movie releases and awards season looming, it should come as no surprise that there are going to be a lot of questions asked in interviews and on red carpets about the Weinstein scandal and all that has come in its wake. It’s also no surprise that we’ll be hearing a lot of canned replies that have “my publicist approved this message” written all over them—though not from you, Uma Thurman! And calls for change. So many calls for change.

Here are just a few of the stars with projects coming out over the next few months to keep an eye on: Matt Damon (“Downsizing”), Greta Gerwig (“Lady Bird”), the entire cast of “Murder On the Orient Express” including (ahem) Johnny Depp, Woody Harrelson (“LBJ”), Julia Roberts (“Wonder”), Margot Robbie (“I, Tonya”), and Anna Kendrick (“Pitch Perfect 3”). And that’s just the beginning.

Yesterday, it was Ben Affleck’s turn as he was out promoting his latest film, “Justice League”. He had a few words to say about the current climate in Hollywood telling the Associated Press that he’s “looking at my own behavior and addressing that and making sure I’m part of the solution.”

It’s probably a good idea that the actor does some self-reflection given the accusations that he groped Hilarie Burton and makeup artist Annamarie Tendler. (He has already apologized for acting inappropriately toward Burton.) And then there’s this video interview from 2004 that recently resurfaced. It’s, frankly, hard to watch.

So, yes, it’s great that Affleck says he wants to be better. (Though it’s more than a little bit distressing that at age 45, he’s just seeing the error of his ways.) That he wants to see “more women need to be pushed to power.” And that sexual harassment also has to be a “men’s issue.” We’re sure to hear many more echo his sentiments.

We just hope they all mean it.



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