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I’m Not a ‘Natural Mother’—And That’s Okay


Days after the birth of my first daughter, I lay in bed swollen, bandaged, bruised, and confused. While recuperating from a traumatic birth, I heard my husband cooing at our daughter and cheerfully changing diapers in the next room. It filled me with love, but to be honest, also with shame. He was a “natural,” and I felt like an awkward accessory.

Wasn’t this the reverse of how it was supposed to go? Weren’t mothers supposed to be guided by their intuition, naturally morphing into nurturing goddesses overnight?

As I carried my daughter through pregnancy, I was also carrying some seriously misguided assumptions. Growing up, I loved home ec classes (dated, I know): the baking, the sewing, the “DIY” craft projects. I coddled my two guinea pigs, and then my two kittens, and later their offspring. I started cooking wholesome dinners for myself in ninth grade when I became the only vegetarian in the house. I was the most sought-after babysitter in the neighborhood.

When it came to all the ingredients I was sure made a mother, I was a natural. Which is why I wasn’t fazed when the word “natural” popped up at just about every point in pregnancy: Was I planning to have a natural birth? Was I eating natural organic foods? Would I be breastfeeding naturally?

But after 40 hours of labor, two epidurals, a cocktail of drugs administered at the hospital, and an unplanned C-section, it seemed that, by some definitions, “natural” was off the table. I stared in woozy, adoring wonder at my wriggling baby as she rooted for milk against my chest. My body craved sleep, but the nurses kept waking me up at two hour intervals, coaxing me to nurse. I kept waiting for instinct to kick in, but breastfeeding felt foreign and clumsy. Wasn’t I supposed to know just what to do? Cheerful lactation specialists arrived and departed, but my confidence in my natural abilities was already eroding.

In the weeks that followed, I cried often, staring both tenderly and fearfully at the little being I was now tethered to. Our bond was not instantaneous, but gradual. It took time for me to get to know her, to feel into our connection, to experience a new depth of love.



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Patrick Ta Velvet Blush Review: Best Blush for a Natural Look


Like most things, my mom was right about blush. As soon as I started regularly wearing makeup in high school, my mom would insist that I needed to “put a little color in my cheeks,” and would practically chase me with a blush brush. For some reason, my idea of blush was that it was dated, clowny, and just generally too “done” looking. (I was also a teenager and probably enjoyed the small rebellion.) So I ignored her pleas. But once I picked up a compact of Nars’ Deep Throat my freshman year of college on a whim—it was out of budget but I couldn’t resist the name—I realized my mom was actually on to something.

Since that day, I’ve been hooked on blush, and will always go to bat for it as the most underrated makeup product. I love the way it instantly wakes up my face, and when applied with a heavy hand it can add either a romantic flush (think a rococo cherub) or a disco edge. That being said, every blush I’ve tried, even what I would consider my ride-or-dies, still had a little room for improvement. And then l I tried the Patrick Ta Monochrome Moment Velvet Blush.

You may know Patrick Ta as the makeup artist behind Gigi Hadid’s, Shay Mitchell’s, and Elsa Hosk’s glowiest makeup looks, and last month he expanded his namesake makeup line to include blushes named after his favorite qualities of the women in his life. Like the name suggests, the blushes have a matte finish, except for She’s Adorable, which has a light shimmer. At first swatch, I was a little underwhelmed, but that was actually intentional—they’re designed to be super buildable.

“I love pigment, but with a blush it’s super important to have something that’s not going to put a whole blob of color onto your cheek,” Ta told me when he introduced the collection. “You should be able to build and grow the color, I think blush should look like a diffused cloud.”

The four shades are designed to be universally flattering and are mostly neutral with one bright option. The pigment swipes on evenly, and imparts the prettiest, natural-looking glow. I like to use a heavy hand to get a lot of color, but it never looks old or fake, and the powder melts into my skin thanks to the included moisturizers and specially treatment pigments. I love to use the peachy shade She’s Sincere in leu of bronzer to add all-over warmth and subtly contour, and a pop of the bright pink She’s Passionate on the apples of my cheeks to make it look like I slept more than five hours.

Ta notes that most of his clients are afraid of blush, as I once was, and recommends starting slow. While I like to go full force with a fluffy brush, he says to apply it with a brush, but then stamp over it with a Beautyblender. “If you use too much blush, this really blends it into your skin and melts the powder for a seamless look,” he says. He also likes to blend a little bit of blush into the crease of your eye to pull a look together.

Bella Cacciatore 

While the seamless application is a plus, for me the biggest perk of this blush is that it actually stays on all day. Despite not having oily skin, I have a face that eats makeup, and most face products don’t last more than a few hours on me (although Urban Decay’s setting spray has been helping), but the first time I tried this one, I was shocked to look in the mirror at the end of the day and see my flush was still in tact.

I’ve barely looked at my other blushes since acquiring the Patrick Ta, which is saying something because I have at least 100 to choose from. The only downside? Every time I swipe it on, I’m reminded that my mom was right.

Patrick Ta Monochrome Moment Velvet Blush

Patrick Ta Monochrome Moment Velvet Blush

$32

Buy Now

Bella Cacciatore is the beauty associate at Glamour. Follow her on Instagram @bellacacciatore_.





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Reese Witherspoon Revealed Her Natural Hair Color on Instagram — See Photos


Sure, Reese Witherspoon is best known for her roles in films and shows including Big Little Lies, Cruel Intentions, and Legally Blonde. But the actress is also often associated with her beautiful blond hair—we personally blame Elle Woods for that.

For pretty much ever, we’ve been convinced the 43-year-old actress’s natural color was blond, but apparently, I’m sorely mistaken. Witherspoon took to Instagram recently to share a childhood photo with her fans, revealing that her natural hair color is actually brown.

The photo was posted with the caption “Mom tip: Send your kid to school with a candy necklace so she can share it with all her new friends,” she wrote. In the throwback pic, Witherspoon’s hair is a light brown with just a hint of a natural blond highlight.

While her hair color is a surprise, we also can’t help but notice that this photo of Witherspoon looks just like her 19-year-old daughter Ava. And the comment section agrees. “Is this Ava or Reece???” says one fan while another says “I don’t know if this is you or your daughter.” Genetics are amazing, aren’t they?

Over the years, Witherspoon has tried a few different hair colors, ranging from deep brown, red hues to, of course, bright blond. Considering how great each color looks on Witherspoon, it’d be hard to figure out what her natural color is were it not for this childhood photo. She can pretty much wear anything. Still, we don’t see her ditching the blond anytime soon.

Now read more about more hair moments from celebrities:



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New York Is the Latest State to Ban Discrimination Against Natural Hair


New York is officially the second state to make it illegal for employers to discriminate against employees because of the way they wear their hair.

Last week, Governor Andrew Cuomo passed Assembly Bill 07797, legislation that would “prohibit race discrimination based on natural hair or hairstyles.” This law will also impact previous efforts to curb discrimination in the state. For example, it will solidify recently introduced human rights guidelines, which called for the protection of citizens’ right to wear natural hair, treated or untreated, in hairstyles such as locs, cornrows, twists, braids, or Bantu knots. The bill is also an amendment to New York state’s Human Rights Law and Dignity for All Students Act, which outlines racial discrimination as “traits historically associated with race, including but not limited to hair texture and protective hairstyles.”

The signing of this law comes on the heels of California’s recently enacted CROWN Act, which made the state the first in the country to ban employers from discriminating against people with natural hair. “By introducing the bill, I wanted to use it as an opportunity to educate my colleagues about the unique experience and opportunities of having black hair. I didn’t want them to see it as a negative,” Los Angeles Democratic senator Holly Mitchell told Glamour. “Because of my natural hair texture, I have the unique opportunity to wear these amazing natural hairstyles.”

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Through the bill, Mitchell also aimed to highlight that locs are no less “professional” than straightened hair or a blowout. “Our knowledge and ideas of what’s ‘appropriate,’ what’s ‘professional,’ what’s ‘beautiful,’ are based on a very Eurocentric standard,” she said. “This bill and my mere presence in presenting the bill was going to challenge that.”

New York becoming the second state to pass this type of anti-discrimination law sends a powerful message to women who have faced issues in the workplace because of how they wear their hair. A recent study from Dove found that black women are 50% more likely to be sent home, or to know a black woman who has been sent home from work because of her hair. Which doesn’t even account for the countless microagressions women face when wearing their hair natural in school or at work.

While it’s too soon to tell how cases of discrimination will be handled under these new laws, it’s a vital step in the right direction for workplace inclusion.



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Michelle Obama Wore Her Natural Curls, and People Are Living for It


Michelle Obama took the stage at the Essence Festival in New Orleans on Saturday (July 6) to have a conversation with Gayle King—and dispense some great advice about dating and marriage. We’re always here for whatever pearls of wisdom Obama has ready to share, but fans of the former First Lady were here for another thing, too: her natural curls, topped off with golden ombré highlights.

We don’t often see Obama’s hair worn like this. She’s openly spoken about having to adopt a “hair strategy” in the White House as part of a deeply frustrating but all-too-real reality about navigating her role as a Black woman in politics.

“Well, you know, the first thing you’ve got to worry about is how to keep [your hair] healthy,” Obama shared on the 2 Dope Queens podcast. “My whole goal was, I want to end this with hair on my head. And so now you’ve got to think about, How do you do that, you know? What are you doing? And are you swimming? Are you working out? But this wasn’t just a first lady journey. This is a black professional women’s journey.”

The strategy was so involved, she said she was “sure a lot of white women are sitting over there going, ‘Man, I didn’t know all that was going on.'”

It’s not just highly visible women like Obama who have been policed about the way their hair grows out of their head. Black women are also passed over for jobs or promotions—despite their qualifications—due to prejudices about their natural or braided hair. California, in fact, just passed the first law of its kind banning discrimination against people with natural hair.

Twitter was here for the moment.

Erika Goldring/Getty Images

“Natural haired Michelle Obama is the good luck charm I needed today,” one fan wrote.

One of the last times we saw Obama with her natural curls was on the cover of Essence in 2018. She was also pictured with her natural texture in 2017, a few months after leaving the White House. Here’s hoping we see more of her curls in the future.





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The Best 23 No-Makeup Makeup Products for a Natural Look 2019


It’s no secret that the no makeup look is a lie. It’s really just a look that can only be achieved with makeup and, often, quite a lot of it. No one just wakes up with a Glossier level glow. That is unless they somehow manage to get eight hours of sleep every night, avoid stress at all cost and don’t occasionally eat a hot cheeto or two. We all have issues—pores, dark under-eye circles, blemishes, etc—so of course we all need a good concealer, nude lip, or perfect eyebrow pencil every now and then. There’s no shame in that.

The reality though is that even if the no makeup look requires actual products, it doesn’t require a ton of time. All you have to do is find the products that really work, a hydrating barely-there base, a blendable blush or cheek tint and some nude lip and eye makeup, and you can use them every morning. Here are the 23 ones we’d recommend you consider. They’ll help you get out the door quick while making it seem like all you did was roll out of bed—in the best way.



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