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Rachel Lindsay Says She's a 'Little Pissed Off' About Becca Kufrin's *Bachelorette* Ending


Becca Kufrin’s season finale of The Bachelorette was dramatic, sure, but it was a cake walk compared to what Rachel Lindsay went through last year. If you forget, one of Lindsay’s suitors, Peter Kraus, was such a fan favorite that it seemed like her actual love story with the winner, Bryan Abasolo, was pushed to the wayside. She constantly had to defend her choice and punt allegations that she was “settling” by picking Abasolo. At one point during the season, Kraus told Lindsay to find someone to have a “mediocre life” with. When the finale aired, the blink-and-you-missed-it proposal at the end of Lindsay’s season was overlooked by viewers. It was like her love life and happiness played second fiddle to the drama—and this was her season of The Bachelorette.

So it’s understandable why Lindsay’s a little bit salty about the fairytale treatment Kufrin received for her season finale, which aired last night (August 6). The controversy surrounding her winner, Garrett Yrigoyen, aside, what ABC viewers saw last night was pure, blissful romance—the polar opposite of Lindsay’s tearful (and windy) finale.

“Do you ever recall seeing Bryan profess how excited he was to propose to me? Do you recall seeing me cry about how I was so excited to say yes to Bryan and get my fairytale ending? The answer would be ‘no’ to both of those questions,” Lindsay wrote in her Bachelorette recap for Us Weekly. “And it is a shame because both of those things actually happened. You just did not see them. See, you know more about the journey of my breakup than the journey to my proposal acceptance. I think it is fair to say that I was denied my on-camera happy ending.”

She continued, “Do I sound a little pissed off? Well that is because I am. Take a trip down memory lane to exactly, oh let’s say one year ago. Becca did not sit on stage for three hours and watch the finale for the first time in front of a live audience. Becca did not have to deal with someone telling her she would live a mediocre life. Becca did not have to deal with being baited with real time questions about her emotions watching certain scenes. Nope, that was me.”

Don’t get it twisted: Lindsay is happy for Kufrin—and she’s happy in real life, too. She’s just upset her Bachelorette finale was edited to appear more tumultuous than romantic. “I was placed on display for three hours and labeled an angry black female,” Lindsay continued. “And there will always be that stigma attached to my finale because it has been said that when truth is blurred by misinformation, perception becomes reality and all is lost.”

What Lindsay wanted was to have her love story documented, and that’s not an unreasonable request. So how can the network pay her back? A televised wedding wouldn’t hurt, though Lindsay isn’t sure she’s down for that. “I have no idea,” she said. “But they damn sure owe us one.”

Related Stories:

Rachel Lindsay Has No Time for This Instagram Comment From Dean Unglert

Rachel Lindsay Is Selling Her Clothes from The Bachelor—and the Reason Is Awesome

Bachelorette Rachel Lindsay Hits Back at People Who Think She “Settled” for the Winner



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Ciara Just Pissed Off a Lot of Single Women with a Video She Shared on Twitter


A decade after singing about being an independent woman who refuses to let men dictate her life in songs like “Goodies” and “That’s Right,” Ciara is under fire for reposting a video on Twitter in which a pastor seemingly reduces women to nothing but wives and girlfriends — as if a woman’s worth can only be derived from the men in her life. In the video, which Ciara posted on Twitter on Saturday night, Pastor John Gray, who has his own show on the Oprah Winfrey Network and has posted openly homophobic statements on Twitter in the past, encourages women who are looking for a relationship to carry themselves like wives. “A wife is not the presence of a ring, but it is the presence of your character. Too many women wanna be married, but you’re walking in the spirit of ‘girlfriend,'” he says, adding, “When you carry yourself like a wife, a husband will find you.” Ciara captioned the video, “#LevelUp.”

The Twittersphere was largely unimpressed with the fact that Ciara — who called off her engagement to rapper Future (the father of her 3-year-old son Future Zahir Wilburn) in 2014 and married NFL star Russell Wilson in 2016 — had endorsed the video. While some took a more lighthearted approach to criticizing the sexist video — “This Ciara business is another reminder that Rihanna is always right,” one person tweeted — others took the post much more seriously. “Ciara is doing what many women do when they overcome trials and get married. She’s using her marital status as a weapon against women who are not married. And it’s clear that she’s tied her value and sense of self worth to her marriage, otherwise she wouldn’t have shared that,” writer CiCi Adams tweeted. “Ciara telling women to ‘Level up’ and live ‘like a wife’ so they can b married is astounding to me. Didn’t you need grace, mercy & compassion when you were being dragged up and down the Internet for the Future situation? How quickly ppl forget when they reach a perch of privilege.”

Others, however, were supportive of Ciara’s decision to repost Gray’s sexist message, although many of those supporters appeared to be men expecting women to cater to them and conform to their ideals. “We love a Queen who knows herself worth and has no problem admitting she had to grow to get there! #LevelUp” one Twitter user wrote.

On Sunday, Ciara attempted to clarify her endorsement of the video with a message about self-love and self-respect. “I was once that girl wanting to be loved a certain way but was making the wrong choices. I found myself at my lowest moment. I was a single mom sitting at home, and I then realized that the perfect love I was looking for was how God loves me, how He wants me to be loved, and who He was calling me to be as a mom and as a woman. Thats when I realized married or not married… I needed to love myself. #LevelUp.”

Related: A New Study Shows Advertisements Are So Sexist, Men Get 7 Times as Many Speaking Roles as Women





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OkCupid Is Getting Rid of Usernames, and a Lot of Users Are Pissed


Following in the footsteps of competitors like Tinder and Bumble, OkCupid has announced it will require its users to use their real names—even if it’s just a first name. The decision that has sparked an uproar with many users, especially with women and the LGBTQ+ community.

In an announcement titled “An Open Letter on Why We’re Removing Usernames, Addressed to the Worst Ones We’ve Ever Seen,” the company explains the rationale behind the decision. “It’s because, like the recent goodbye we said to AIM screen names, it’s time to keep up with the times. We want you, BigDaddyFlash916, to go by who you are, and not be hidden beneath another layer of mystique. Even if that mystique is crucial to you and your dating life, unicorn__jizz.”

We get it: It’s a little less…’00s? Or an effort to look less creepy—considering that, according to OkCupid data cited in the post, upwards of 16,000 users have the word “horny” in their name.

Here’s the problem, though: For a lot of people who don’t happen to be straight, cis men, the ability to use a username can function as a sort of screen, especially at the very beginning of interactions, before a rapport and some sort of trustworthiness is established. In these cases, a username can be critical to feeling safe on the site. And many users let OkCupid know exactly that.

After some backlash, OkCupid said on Friday that they’ll allow users to use the name they’d like to be called on the site, not their full names, as a way to maintain privacy. “We’ve also heard from many members of our community that they want to maintain the privacy they enjoy with usernames—with this change, we won’t be collecting full names; instead, we encourage our users to go by the name they’d like their dates to call them on OkCupid,” the company wrote on the blog. They also tweeted: “We love our members. You do not need to use your government name or even your full first name. Use the name, nickname, or initials you’d like your date to call you on OkCupid.”

So apparently you can use your real name, your first name only, a nickname, or a name you’d like to be called as an OkCupid user…wait a second.

The change, whatever it is, apparently won’t take effect for everyone right away: The company will start rolling it out with a test group “ahead of the New Year” and then everyone else gets hit with it soon after. OkCupid suggests updating profiles ASAP with what you’d want other users to call you, whatever that may be.

Related Stories:
–OkCupid Now Lets You Know Which Dudes Support Planned Parenthood
–How One Woman Confronted the Issue of Racial Bias on Online Dating Sites
–A 7-Year-Old Makes Her Mom a Dating Profile, and the Results Are Hilarious





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