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How Katie Sturino Turned Divorce Weight Gain Into a Thriving Business


When I was married, I was very concerned about my body. I was obsessed with maintaining a size 12, or staying close to it. Then, about three years ago, I got separated and I gained a bunch of weight. At first I didn’t even realize I was putting it on. I was working out, but it just kept happening. In total, I ended up gaining about 60 pounds. I became a size 16, which I still am, and a surprising thing happened—I really loved my body.

At first I felt vulnerable. Especially when I started dating. I’d been out of the game for a long time and I just kept thinking, “nobody is ever going to love me ever again.” But I forced myself to do it, and I remember meeting this one guy for a drink. We went to a bar and I only stayed for a half hour or so, but I’ll never forget him telling me how beautiful I was. It was like he couldn’t get over me. Now, I don’t think that your self-worth should come from men whatsoever, but this was an area of my life where I didn’t have much confidence. And to all of a sudden have that outward validation pushed me to think, “Oh, maybe I am good looking.”

So I started wearing clothes that I never felt comfortable enough to wear, like jean shorts. I never would’ve worn them before because I would’ve thought, “I look stupid,” or “I can’t pull them off.” Flash forward, and I’m literally wearing black jean shorts with a button down shirt tucked into them right now—and I look awesome. When I was married I don’t think I would’ve worn any of the things I do now, or at least with the same confidence, even though I was two sizes smaller then.

I channeled this love for my new look into The 12ish Style, my blog that’s all about being chic at any size. I’d launched it while I was still married, but I wasn’t really taking it seriously. Then as soon as I got divorced I had nothing but this panic energy, where I was waking up at 4:30 or 5 every morning ready to go. So I was like “we need to put some real work into this.” I signed a manager, an agent, I started writing more, and hired a real photographer.

Around this time former Real Housewives star Carole Radziwill, who lost her husband at a young age, said something to me at a Christmas party that always stuck with me. She told me, “ride the horse in the direction that it’s going.” To me it meant, you can find strength in these moments where you think your life is over. You can’t change what has happened to you, so just go where the energy is good.

So The 12ish became my escape. I put everything into it. I took all the pain, anxiety, and uncertainty and pushed it toward something I felt passionate about. It blew up really fast and each day I’d talk to women on the platform who had changed their opinion about themselves because of it. They’d tell me stories about learning to love their bodies in a bathing suit, or just finally being able to accept themselves. It felt amazing and I really credit it with helping me get through my divorce. It wasn’t that I was specifically addressing relationships or my marriage on there, but to just suddenly have such a positive online community felt fucking amazing.

It was like all of a sudden I hit a point where I just stopped caring so much. During my marriage I spent so much time worrying about everything, but then the relationship ended, and it didn’t matter. My fear of having something to lose was gone, and I kind of said, “fuck it.” I was gonna wear jean shorts if I wanted to, embrace my body, and open myself up to men who thought I was beautiful.

Now, when I look back at pictures of myself from five years ago I don’t think “I look so skinny,” or “I look so young.” I think, I look so unhappy. I look at my eyes and smile and everything feels strained and forced. When I see a picture of myself now I look at such a joyful person, and falling in love with my body gave me that happiness.

For me, if I can inspire one woman or one man who has gained weight during their divorce to look at themselves and think, “this will not make me hate my body,” then it will all have been worth it. I want people to know, this isn’t your body’s fault, and it’s not because you’re not in shape. We’re so quick to blame our bodies or our physical appearance, instead of celebrating ourselves in all forms.

And one day maybe I’ll lose the weight, or maybe I won’t. If I ever did, it wouldn’t be because I don’t like the way I look, it would only be if the doctors told me some shit in my body is breaking down. Then ok, I got it, cool. But aesthetically and image-wise? I’ve never felt better.

Katie Sturino is the founder of The 12ish Style and the beauty brand, Megababe.



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Cardi B Says She's 'Very Depressed' That She Can't Stop Losing Weight Since Giving Birth


Cardi B recently opened up about some post-pregnancy body changes she’s struggling with. On Thursday, November 15, the Bronx-born rapper went on Instagram Live and shared that she’s been “very depressed” because she’s lost so much weight since the birth of her daughter, Kulture, this July.

“I’ve been very depressed because I cannot stop losing weight,” Cardi said in the video. “And it’s so crazy because when I first gave birth, I did everything to lose my baby weight. I was drinking Teami so it could curb my appetite and now that I lost all the baby weight in my stomach and in my arms and in my face, now I want to gain weight, but now I can’t gain weight because I have a terrible appetite. I can literally go 24 hours without eating.”

She went on to add that part of this discomfort with her weight loss has to do with her past. “I used to look too skinny as a teenager, and I used to hate it and I hate it now,” she said. “It’s been really depressing me, making me sad.”

It’s not the first time Cardi has spoken candidly about how she’s dealing with motherhood. Earlier this year, she dropped out of a high-profile tour alongside Bruno Mars, citing her new baby as the reason. “I also thought that I’d be able to bring [Kulture Kiari] with me on tour,” she explained. “But I think I underestimated this whole mommy thing.”

Still, learning to balance her baby and her career hasn’t stopped Cardi from continuing to dominate the music industry. Her first performance after giving birth stole the show at the 2018 AMAs, and she even dropped a few bars on an explosive new song that features Selena Gomez. She also just landed a role on Netflix’s upcoming hip hop competition series and launched a collection with Fashion Nova.

Cardi may be figuring some things out still, but she’s got her career on lock.

Related: Cardi B Released Her New Song Because ‘I Got a Baby, I Need Some Money’





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On Weight, Fertility, and What This Is Us Got Right—and Wrong


When Kate Pearson found out she was pregnant last season on This Is Us, fans rejoiced. But then she miscarried, and the loss felt personal—even to actress Chrissy Metz. “I would literally go home and not want to talk to anybody,” she told Glamour about filming the storyline. “It was difficult because you’re crying and all these emotions are right there all the time.”

Her journey didn’t end there, though. This season’s premiere showed Kate and her husband, Toby, visiting a fertility specialist to discuss their options. But when the doctor delivers her assessment to the couple, she says this: “At your weight, the chances for a successful pregnancy are very slim—even with IVF.”

The doctor frames the prognosis around Kate’s weight, even though she also knows Kate has PCOS (polycystic ovarian syndrome) and is 38, which is medically considered “advanced maternal age.” (This category actually applies to all pregnancies in women over 35 — just another example of the BS women face at the doctor’s office.) Both of these factors complicate one’s ability to get pregnant, but her doctor chose to focus on one thing: the number on the scale.

It’s a gutting moment for Kate, who has been reduced to her weight many times on the show. And after the episode aired, many women took to social media to voice their opinion on the storyline:

But for others, it hit home. Sarah Meres, 30, told Glamour her story of trying to get pregnant is eerily similar to Kate’s in many ways, including having PCOS and a husband with a low sperm count. (The doctor tells Toby his sperm count is low because he’s on antidepressants.)

“I saw one gynecologist who told me I need to lose another 40 pounds because my weight, along with having PCOS, was causing me to continue to be infertile,” Mares says. “He told me that my weight [plays] a major role in my PCOS, and the faster I lose [it] the better. What he doesn’t understand is how hard it is to lose weight with PCOS.” Mares says she’s lost 75 pounds so far, but still hasn’t been able to conceive.

Another fan of the show, Ivanka Sanchez, 36, who also has PCOS, agrees. “It was relatable, though maybe not realistic,” she says. “I lost a massive amount of weight in 2016 when I got pregnant for the first time. When I asked how it was possible, the doctor’s answer was the weight loss. But I’ve had struggles with infertility for 16 years, at every weight.”

While simply saying “lose weight and you’ll get pregnant” definitely sounds out-of-touch, there is a reason why a doctor might bring it up: It’s one of the only factors a woman has immediate control over when it comes to fertility. (There’s currently no cure for PCOS.) “We want to look at where can we make an intervention, and weight loss is a place where we can achieve a real increase in chances of a successful pregnancy,” says Nathaniel DeNicola, M.D., an assistant professor of obstetrics and gynecology at George Washington University and the environmental health expert for the American Council of Gynecology. “Even losing five percent of body weight helps.”

PHOTO: NBC

But why? As Dr. DeNicola explains, obesity leads to excess estrogen in the body, which can mess with ovulation. “It’s sort of the same mechanism as a birth control pill,” he explains. “If you produce more estrogen, that creates feedback that you don’t need to ovulate.” If you reduce fat tissue, you lessen the effect.

Still, Dr. DeNicola says there’s actually no definitive answer to whether or not body weight is a factor with IVF. “There’s no question obesity decreases the chance of getting pregnant, but for IVF, body weight as a factor is unclear,” he says, adding that, in his opinion, it was also not entirely realistic to have a doctor say she won’t be able to take Kate on as a patient because of how her BMI might affect the outcome. (The doctor later changes her mind.) “The standard is informed consent,” he explains. “The patient should have the autonomy to make a choice whether they want to continue treatment.” In other words, a doctor should lay everything out for the patient and let her decide.

Co-showrunner Isaac Aptaker told Glamour in a previous interview that the show did consult doctors on Kate’s storyline. “Once we started to hear that [PCOS] is common, then we brought in doctors and said, ‘What does the reality of this look like? And how do we get it right?'” he said. “We showed this episode to a fertility doctor, and he was like, ‘Thank you. Nobody is doing this, and it’s so common. I see it every day.'”

Ultimately, Kate does decide to move forward with IVF. Whether or not she’s able to conceive, the storyline will hopefully continue to help women who’ve dealt with similar struggles feel seen.

“I felt all the emotions Kate did when they suggested adoption or fostering,” Mares says. “There was a sting, because you want a baby and you are two people so in love who deserve children and it just isn’t happening. And being overweight or obese just makes dealing with fertility even more difficult. I felt her pain.”

Related: Everything We Know About This Is Us Season 3





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Michelle Pfeiffer Was Asked About Her Weight During ‘Scarface’ Panel, Audience Boos


During a panel discussion at the Tribeca Film Festival on Thursday night, actors Michelle Pfeiffer, Al Pacino, and Steven Bauer reunited with director Brian De Palma to talk about the cult-favorite film Scarface, which is celebrating its 35th anniversary this year. The stars of the drug kingpin classic shared memories from the set and analyzed the movie’s cultural impact, but the event moderator Jesse Kornbluth drew the ire of the crowd when he directed his first question at Pfeiffer and asked, “What did you weigh?”

If you remember, Pfeiffer played Elvira, the wife of the Al Capone-inspired drug dealer Tony Montana, and she becomes progressively more distressed and addicted to cocaine as the film unfolds. According to Entertainment Weekly, Kornbluth said, “Michelle, as the father of a daughter, I’m concerned with body image. The preparation for this film what did you weigh?” The audience responded with loud boos, and Vanity Fair described that, “Pacino, Bauer, and De Palma immediately turned to look at her, shocked by the question.”

Pfeiffer herself was speechless for a few seconds and looked around the room, perplexed. Someone from the crowd could be heard telling her, “You don’t have to answer that.”

Kornbluth quickly countered, “This is not the question you think it is,” and Pfeiffer reluctantly responded, “Well, okay. “I don’t know, but I was playing a cocaine addict, so that was part of the physicality of the part which you have to consider.” She joked that she was living on “tomato soup and Marlboros.” The incident would have been over, but Kornbluth followed up with a question about what she ate when the shoot wrapped. She told him she didn’t remember, but said “probably Mexican food. Probably chips and guacamole.”

What fascination with her eating habits! Even if “body image” was the conceit of the question, she could have simply been asked what she did to prepare for the role, which would have offered a look into the psyche of her complex character in addition to the physicality she offered. Also, let’s keep in mind that her co-star Pacino played a cocaine addict who was gaunt, hollow-eyed, and haggard by the end of the film, too, but he wasn’t asked about his appearance and eating regimen.

The questions reflect how male and female actors often get wildly different questions about their roles and their craft. At a 2012 press conference for The Avengers, someone asked Scarlett Johansson and Robert Downey Jr. about their character preparation—only, they asked Downey about his character’s evolving “maturity,” and they asked Johansson about her diet. Johansson made headlines for turning to Downey and quipping, “How come you get the really interesting existential question, and I get the like, ‘rabbit food’ question?”

Let’s hope Pfeiffer gets meatier questions at the next Scarface reunion—there’s no doubt that the three-time Oscar-nominated actress has plenty to say that doesn’t involve weight or guac.





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Chrissy Metz Just Landed a Lead Movie Role That Has Nothing to Do With Weight


Chrissy Metz is redefining the way we see plus-size women on screen. This started, of course, on NBC’s hit show This Is Us, where she plays a woman, Kate, dealing with painfully-relatable body image issues. Kate’s one of the first plus-size characters in pop-culture who’s actually treated like a real person—not some caricature designed for ridicule or embarrassing slapstick humor. She’s nuanced and flawed and framed so empathetically that anyone who’s struggled with weight sees themselves in her. I know I do.

But seeing Kate fully realized on screen doesn’t fix Hollywood’s plus-size representation problem. After all, her storyline is by and large still about weight—and that, in itself, is an issue. Plus-size people don’t spend every waking moment of their days agonizing over the scale or what they eat; they have jobs and friends and relationships. Some don’t even have an interest in losing weight at all. It’s great that Kate’s weight issues are addressed respectfully on This Is Us, but the next step is having them not exist at all—or, at least, talked about less. Granted, this is happening—slightly—on This Is Us season two. Kate does have narratives—albeit minor ones—unrelated to her weight, but the undercurrent of her body issues still exists.

Maybe Metz’s new film role will change that, though. Deadline reports that the actress has been tapped to star in The Impossible, which is based on the real-account, faith-based book The Impossible: The Miraculous Story of a Mother’s Faith and Her Child’s Resurrection. Metz will play Joyce, a mother whose 14-year-old son fell through a frozen lake in Missouri and was pronounced lifeless. However, she kept praying by her son’s bedside until his heart (miraculously) started beating again.

That’s all we know about Metz’s character for now, but from this description, it appears any weight or body-image storyline is minimal or nonexistent—and that’s huge. For the first time, it feels like Metz is being viewed as an actress who happens to be plus-size and not a “plus-size actress.” Her physical appearance is taking a back seat to her talent, which is what we all want at the end of the day: for the world to know that our bodies don’t define us—that we’re capable of doing anything (or, in Metz’s case, playing anything).

This role is a long time coming for Metz, who told Glamour a few months back that she was reading several “really great scripts” but not receiving “a ton of offers.” (We also reached out for comment on this latest news and will update if we hear back.)

“I have to say, there’s not a ton of [movie] offers,” Metz said. “But, for me, comedy is so important. Obviously, comedy stems from tragedy, so that’s something I always wanted to do. I thought that was really going to be my niche, and then American Horror Story happened and This Is Us happened. So I want to [cover] all the spectrum—from Kate to kooky, really outrageous characters, to heartfelt [roles]. But I have read a lot of really great scripts, so fingers crossed. There’s a lot of really amazing women and a lot of really talented people out there, so I believe what’s right for me is right for me. Hopefully it will come around, and maybe I’ll just start writing myself. Who knows!”

Hopefully, Metz’s casting in this film leads to more diverse body representation in Hollywood, too—specifically in rom-coms and action movies, where plus-size characters are virtually nonexistent. And I’m hoping this will give the This Is Us show-runners a push to steer Kate’s narrative in a different direction. She’s so much more than her dress size or a number on the scale.

I’m certainly feeling empowered just from hearing this news. Culture has ingrained this warped notion in my mind that, no matter where I go, my body will always be an issue—that I can’t exist at a bar or restaurant or party without my weight being noticed. It’s like my size is the elephant in the room that I must address—or, in most cases, apologize for—before I’m deemed worthy of social interaction. The idea that people who look like me can exist in pop-culture without their weight being acknowledged is comforting. On This Is Us, Chrissy Metz held a mirror up to my body-image issues, and that was extraordinary. But now she’s doing something even more important with this film role (and the film roles to come): She’s giving me permission to just exist—unapologetically.

Related Stories:

Chrissy Metz: “When I Booked This Is Us, I Had 81 Cents in My Bank Account”

Chrissy Metz’s Emmy Nomination Is a Win for More Than Just TV



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Khloé Kardashian's Family Told Her to Lose Weight Because She Was 'Hurting' Their Brand


In August 2015, Khloé Kardashian told Complex magazine that she’d lost 35 pounds. The physical transformation, she said later on an episode of Keeping Up With the Kardashians, was completely accidental: She started hitting the gym after splitting from Lamar Odom as a way to de-stress, and the weight started slowly coming off. When Kardashian started noticing the changes, though, she made a conscious effort to get healthier.

Now, health and fitness are vital components to Kardashian’s business. She has a (sometimes problematic) show on E! titled Revenge Body, which helps people lose weight to “get back” at certain adversaries in their lives. Plus, she’s always posting gym and healthy eating tips to her social media accounts. Her lifestyle change, for many, is inspiring because it seems completely organic.

But that’s not the full story. It wasn’t just stress from a breakup that caused Kardashian to work out more and make healthier eating choices. Her family was pressuring her to do this, too—and for reasons that will make you cringe.

Us Weekly reports that on an episode of Revenge Body this season, Kardashian reveals her family told her to lose weight because she was damaging their public image. The reality star tells a contestant her family essentially said, “Khloé, you got to lose weight cause you’re really hurting the brand.” Oof.

“I understand that was coming from my management side of my family, but it does hurt,” Kardashian also says on Revenge Body. “I’m a huge believer of it’s not what you say, it’s how you say it.”

How disappointing. Khloé Kardashian is funny, unfiltered, bold, and intelligent. She’s an integral member of the Kardashian family and elevates any “brand” she’s a part of—no matter her size. People love Kardashian for her sparkling personality and wit, plain and simple. It’s disheartening her family members apparently couldn’t see that.

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