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Rachel Bloom Actually Bought the Ta-Ta Towel and Shared Her Review With the World


PHOTO: David Livingston/Getty Images

If you took one look at the Ta-Ta Towels that went viral over the summer and thought, “Who would ever actually wear this?” you now have the answer: Rachel Bloom.

A quick refresher: The Ta-Ta Towel is a specially-designed bra (think: a terry cloth boob hammock that wraps around your neck and hoists up the girls) that’s meant to keep your boobs from sweating when it’s hot outside—or in Bloom’s case, when you’re getting ready for a scene on your hilarious hit TV show. The Crazy Ex-Girlfriend star (and all-around hilarious human being) tested out a black-and-white patterned version of the viral bra while on set on Monday, and posted a picture of the results on Instagram.

The verdict? Bloom’s actually into it.

“I am thrilled with my @tatatowels purchase and how well it goes with the hairstyle for the scene I’m shooting today,” she captioned the nearly-topless shot. “THIS frau is keepin’ it classy and dry!” To prove just how well the contraption worked, Bloom also posted a boomerang of herself on her Instagram Story in which she shimmies her Ta-Ta Towel–covered boobs. As the company’s slogan promises, they really do look “high and dry.”

In addition to being straight-up hilarious, Bloom’s Ta-Ta Towel test was also majorly inspiring for many women: Several followers reached out to the comedian in the comments section of her post, thanking her for making them feel more comfortable about having big boobs. “You’re the only person on earth that saves me from my larger than life(pun intended) big boob depression. I need one of these!” commented one user. “Role Model,” wrote another. One commenter also suggested that the Ta-Ta Towel should get its own song and dance number on this season of Crazy Ex-Girlfriend, which is pretty much the best idea anyone has ever had, ever.

Leave it to Bloom, who once performed a rap all about the struggles of having a larger bust, to make a literal “over-the-shoulder boulder holder” look fabulous. You can order yours here (because I’m definitely not the only person who really, really wants one after seeing this).

Related: Rachel Bloom Spends Up to $3,000 on Her Own Non-Sample-Size Red-Carpet Dresses



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Cure Aqua Gel Review: The Best Japanese Exfoliator for Soft, Smooth Skin


I’m really not the kind of person who says things like, “This [random beauty product] changed my life!” For most of my adulthood, I’ve followed a skin care and makeup routine that can politely be described as boring as hell: Gentle cleanser followed by moisturizer, a dab of CC cream with a little blush or highlighter, and then I throw on some mascara and call it a day.

Still, I’ve always been a little bit jealous of people with elaborate beauty regimens. You know, someone who has a really gorgeous bathroom counter filled with beautiful, minimalistic bottles. The kind of person who regularly matches their lipstick to their outfit, and their facial cleanser to their current skin care conundrum. Someone who knows what clarifying toner is and does. Seriously, though, what is toner? [Ed Note: Read this!]

So believe me when I tell you, Cure Natural Aqua Gel changed my life. Over the years, I tried a lot of rough exfoliators in the hope that they would clean my pores, which always felt like there were blackheads ready to wreck my complexion and ruin my mood at a moment’s notice—especially on my T-zone. My thinking, I guess, was that if I used an abrasive formula, it would slough the crap out of my skin like a dang steel wool sponge. In reality, these exfoliators did little to fix the problem and made me break out. Not great.

But two years ago, when I saw Cure Natural Aqua Gel on a roundup of the best Japanese beauty products available stateside—and discovered that it’s one of the most popular treatments in Japan, with a bottle sold every 12 seconds—I figured it would be worth a shot. It didn’t hurt that a 250ml bottle was under $26 on Amazon, so it wasn’t some massive investment if it didn’t work.

Turns out, it’s the best pore cleanser I’ve ever used. It worked so well that I’ve since become the person at a party who talks at length about their skin care routine and insists that you buy a bottle of this stuff, like, yesterday. And I don’t care!

This product becomes even more magical when you first open the package and realize that it has the exact consistency, look, and even vaguely the smell of hand sanitizer. Don’t be alarmed. The most important thing is that you follow the directions: If you just try to use it like any ol’ cleanser, you won’t get results. And in case you don’t read Japanese (which you’d need if you were going to go off just what was on the bottle), here’s how to use it:

1. With wet or dry skin, put three or four pumps of the gel on your fingertips and apply it to a small area of your face. I have an issue with the pores on my nose, so I usually start there. (Note that some people will tell you to use it only on your dry skin, but I use this bad boy on just-cleaned, drip-dried skin in the shower and still see killer results.)

2. Let the gel sit for four or five seconds. You won’t feel anything at all during this time—no tingling, no burning—because even though it’s a chemical exfoliant, it’s surprisingly gentle.

3. Begin to work the gel in small, gentle circles over the selected area. Do this for about 30 seconds until a film starts to appear.

4. Repeat on other areas of your face. Don’t stop ’til you get enough.

PHOTO: Jennifer Mulrow

Gross, I know, but you’ve kinda got to see the results to believe it.

As you’re working the gel with your fingers between steps 3 and 4, you’ll start to feel small, filmy balls of gunk come to the surface. Like “skin gritting,” it’s not entirely clear what they are. The bottle claims they’re “beads of dead skin cells” and I swear it’s the stuff from inside my pores because they’re cleaner immediately after, but I checked with a derm (Dr. Joshua Zeichner at Mount Sinai Hospital in New York, he’s great), and technically this gel doesn’t have any exfoliating ingredients. Rather, it’s got hydrating, botanical, and firming ones, along with acrylates that help the gel stick to your skin.

Could it be that glue breaking down, as some suspect? Possibly. All I know is that it’s like Baby Foot in that it is gross and satisfying. But it’s also quick and for your face. It’s like Baby Face! And since you should really only use it a couple times a week, that 250ml bottle will last you months.

My skin’s general appearance is more even and clear after two years of consistent use. Not only am I regularly complimented on my overall face smoothness, but I occasionally insist on having complete strangers come and stroke my cheek so they can confirm its smoothness for themselves. One day, I assume this will lead to a date.

Which is why, in addition to being a great treatment, I can also recommend it as a fantastic way to break the ice at your next social engagement.

Cure Natural Aqua Gel, $25.85, amazon.com

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Lancôme's Monsieur Big Mascara Review: It Holds Curl for 15 (!) Hours


I like my mascara to be big, flashy, and easy on the eyes. Those are the three goals, and while it seems like that’s what every new mascara release promises to deliver, very few follow through on that last, crucial stake. Blame my dry eyes, allergies, and the office AC—I blame them all, ruthlessly. But the fact remains that while I love trying new mascaras, by the end of the day I’ve smudged it, I’ve rubbed it, I’ve put eye drops in underneath it, and that leaves just the slightest trace of mascara still hanging around.

Which sucks, especially because my specific problems aside, this summer has been good to us in mascara options. From Dior’s fun and efficient squeezy tube, to Urban Decay’s sex-proof mascara, and L’Oréal’s excellent drugstore stunner, we’ve got choices. Then again, so did Carrie Bradshaw for six seasons and look how that turned out. (Fine, that was regarding men, not mascaras, but as often as she stared at a computer screen too, I bet she also knew this struggle.)

After trying endless reccs from friends and every new launch that caught my eye, I couldn’t help but wonder where was my match? My one loyal mascara I could trust to stay with me on my lashes day in and day out? Was I destined to settle? This, of course, is hyperbole, but to both my elation and dismay (#TeamBerger) I actually did find “the one” that met all my needs. Mr. Big. Or rather, because it’s a Lancôme mascara and the brand is French, Monsieur Big.

Unlike its namesake (who was flaky at best), this Big comes through. With just a few strokes, my lashes become dark, thick, and long enough to graze my browbrone. It doesn’t even leave those annoying smudges behind that other mascaras do, because the best part is, it stays where you want it. I have my morning regimen down to a science, so I can say with some certainty that I apply my mascara at around 7:42 A.M. every day. By the time I call it quits and wash my face around 11 it’s still there, curl perfectly intact. Coming from the brand behind the cult favorite Definicils mascara, I shouldn’t have expected any less.

I almost judged a book by its cover; a product by its silly (yet also entirely brilliant) name. But this is a great mascara.

Lancôme Monsieur Big Mascara, $25, sephora.com

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Urban Decay Troublemaker Mascara Review


When a mascara’s description tells you it’s going to be “blacker than your darkest thoughts,” any beauty junkie worth their weight in highlighter knows it’s Urban Decay, a brand that’s made cult-favorites out of names like Perversion and Naked. The next step, obviously, is to test it out. Who are you really if you can look at a tube of Urban Decay mascara and not be tempted to maniacally swish it along your lashes. Which is exactly what I did when the line’s new Troublemaker mascara crossed my desk.

To be honest, I’ve been using the product for over a month now—ever since UD’s founder Wende Zomnir gave her followers a sneak peek at the tube on Instagram—and it’s taken nearly all my strength to not shout about it from my apartment window. And now, friends, the time has come.

Troublemaker is formulated with the intent of giving your lashes both serious volume and length without flaking or going limp. And it absolutely delivers.

The oil slick-like packaging is cool enough for anyone to want to grab it and give it a go (but don’t be fooled, the formula inside is black as black can be—read: not holographic), but the brush is really where it’s at for me. Unlike it’s predecessor, the beloved Urban Decay Perversion mascara, the wand is not giant, proving size is not always an indicator of performance. If anything, it’s less daunting to maneuver and the formula itself is less thick. The volume comes from the bristles, which alternate between short, silicone nubs that help apply the mascara to build volume, and long comb-like arms that separate and fan individual hairs.

The one thing that drives me crazy about most volume-enhancing mascaras is that heavy, clumpy feeling on my lashes, but because of the combing bristles on this wand, I don’t have stickiness, my delicate hairs aren’t weighed down, and the lightweight formula allows a curl to last all day without the help of an unwieldy tool.

My application technique is as follows: wiggle the wand down to the bottom of your lashes, getting all that gorgeous thickness at the root and then gently comb as you pull the wand out to the ends, letting the formula coat every last hair. The result: full, long, and clump-free.

PHOTO: Katie Friedman

Another cool aspect of the brush: The rows of bristles get gradually longer depending on how you hold it. Some are shorter on the top and others gradually go from long to short on the bottom, so you can rotate the wand to get the smaller parts into the corners of your lashes—an area that often goes untouched or inevitably ends up smudged when you’re working with a chubby brush.

As for the formula, it’s made with light fibers, so you get some faux diameter and some length without those flaky rogue pieces than tend to wind up in your eyes, causing you to rub them and ruin all your effort.

Urban Decay promises this mascara will make your lashes “super-fat, super-long, and sex-proof.” I can proudly confirm all three claims from personal experience. It’s also not waterproof, which is worth noting in case you’re a cryer. I do, in fact, tend to tear up a lot but I usually don’t go for waterproof mascaras because they’re too hard to remove. This one is easy to take off with a cleanser and doesn’t run. It’s basically a crier’s dream.

PHOTO: Katie Friedman

Urban Decay Troublemaker Mascara, $24, starting September 5 at urbandecay.com

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