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The Best Vibrator Is So Good One Amazon Reviewer Nearly Passed Out


Allow us to state the obvious: orgasms are amazing. They’re empowering, good for your brain, and deliver the kind of deep satisfaction that can only be found following a flood of feel-good hormones—with or without a partner. It’s no wonder the internet is perpetually in search of the best vibrator. And according to the most enthusiastic Amazon review you’ll ever read, one woman may have found it.

Back in April, an anonymous review of a friendly-looking bright purple vibrator was posted on Amazon. At under $50, the Tracy’s Dog Clitoral Sucking Vibrator was a bargain with some big claims: “revolutionary” suction technology, multiple vibration patterns to please the most sensitive nerve endings, a “slightly phallic tip.” Still, reviewer Express7976 wasn’t prepared. “Having read everyone’s reviews, I had high expectations, but with the price being under 50 dollars, I wasn’t exactly going to be shocked if it was mediocre,” she wrote. “A few friends of mine bought it recently, and told me of its power. I was warned to take the day off, hydrate, and above all do some stretches. I thought they were being such drama queens.”

Two days after ordering, the little purple vibrator arrived. “Opening the very discreet box, instructions say 2.5 hour charge time. Not too bad, I plug this lil bad boy in. While the kids are at school waiting for it to charge, killing time reading some erotica my friend and fellow queenie recommended because I don’t have time to screw around waiting to get into ‘the mood,'” the reviewer wrote. “I have to get the kids in a few hours and I need to be ready to go when this thing is done charging. Tik tok b!tch, tik tok. Welcome to motherhood.”

Anticipation building, she checked the little pink charging light every 10 minutes “like a crackhead waiting for his dealer” to see if the best vibrator on Amazon really lived up to it’s reputation. “After only and hour and a half [of charging], solid pink light. Game on.”

Here’s what happened next:

“I played with the settings on my hand to test this fine machinery out. The vibration for the g spot part is quite strong, I was impressed with with that even before use,” the review continues. “Next was suction. So many levels it was interesting to see the different patterns and strength. There are 10 levels for clitoral and 10 patterns for g spot. I’ve never used a clit suction type stimulator, so I have nothing to compare it to, but looked forward to it nonetheless. Time to solo party.

I found placement for the clit a bit low for my body shape, it took me a few min to get everything where it needed to be. That was a bit time consuming and slightly frustrating. But as with any new toy, it’s trial and error. I started the clit one on low, which I barely even felt. Unbeknownst to me it wasn’t lined up 100 percent. So, me being me, I decide to go from zero to 60 in 3.5. I hit the suction button setting to level 5 or 6 and hit the g spot button as well. And made a minor adjustment on suction placement.

At least I think that’s what happened, Because I’m pretty sure I blacked out.

My legs went straight out like those goats who faint when scared.

I never came so fast and so hard in my life. I squirted, I have NEVER DONE THAT. (Luckily I put a towel down cause I hate wet spots)

I frantically tried to turn it off, but ended up hitting the buttons like a maniac, sending to even stronger suction and now variant pulses from the g spot vibrator. And came, again. Im pretty sure I levitated. It was an unending orgasm. This time, my soul left me, and god himself said: “Child, it is not your time, go back to the lil pink light.” (Mind you, I’m agnostic.) I’m brought back into my earthly body after managing to pull it off me throwing it across my bed, it falls to the floor, still buzzing happily away.



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All the States That Have Recently Passed Extreme Abortion Legislation


On Thursday (May 16), the Missouri Senate voted to pass legislation that bans abortions after eight weeks of pregnancy, even in cases of rape, incest, or human trafficking. Doctors who perform the procedure could face up to 15 years in prison. The bill still needs to pass the Missouri House of Representatives, but it is expected to do so and will then go to Governor Mike Parson, who has indicated he will sign it into law.

“My administration will execute the laws the legislature passes, and this pro-life administration will not back down,” he told reporters Wednesday evening, according to the Kansas City Star.

That makes Missouri the latest state to pass a bill positioned to challenge Roe v. Wade—the Supreme Court case that established a woman’s right to an abortion in 1973—in the courts after Georgia and Alabama passed similar bills earlier this week.

Here’s a breakdown of all the states with recent restrictive abortion legislation.

Missouri

The bill on the docket in Missouri contains a “trigger” provision that will ban abortion outright if the Supreme Court overturns Roe v. Wade, which legalized a woman’s right to the procedure without undue government interference nationwide. It also contains additional restrictions that would remain in effect if the two-month threshold were thrown out by the courts, as has happened in other states.

“Politicians are putting the health and lives of Missouri women at risk in their race to make our state the one that overturns Roe v. Wade at the Supreme Court,” M’Evie Mead, director of policy and organizing for Planned Parenthood Advocates in Missouri, said in a statement. “These bans on safe, legal abortion will have real costs—expensive legal costs and human costs for the women and families who need reproductive health care.”

Alabama

Yesterday (May 15), Alabama governor Kay Ivey signed into law an abortion bill that would outlaw the procedure as soon as the moment of conception with exceptions only if the mother’s health is at risk. An amendment that would have carved out additional exceptions for cases of rape and incest failed. Under this law, doctors could face up to 99 years in prison if they performed an abortion and could be sentenced to up to 10 years for even attempting to administer one.

“Today, I signed into law the Alabama Human Life Protection Act, a bill that was approved by overwhelming majorities in both chambers of the Legislature,” Governor Ivey said in a statement. “To the bill’s many supporters, this legislation stands as a powerful testament to Alabamians’ deeply held belief that every life is precious and that every life is a sacred gift from God.” Read more about it here.

Georgia

Earlier in May, Georgia’s so-called heartbeat bill was signed into law by Governor Brian Kemp, banning abortions starting at the moment when doctors can detect a fetal heartbeat, around six weeks postconception. At that point many women do not yet know they are pregnant. (The previous law in Georgia allowed abortions up to 20 weeks.) Exceptions are allowed to prevent harm to the woman and in cases of rape or incest in which a police report has been filed. The new bill also criminalizes the procedure itself, which means that a woman who terminates her pregnancy could face life in prison or even the death penalty.

“Our job is to do what is right, not what is easy,” Kemp said. “We are called to be strong and courageous, and we will not back down.”



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Luke Perry Has Passed Away at 52—See His Fans' Emotional Tributes


Luke Perry, star of Beverly Hills, 90210 and Riverdale, has passed away at the age of 52, TMZ confirms.

The actor suffered from what TMZ calls a “massive stroke” last Wednesday, February 27, from which he sadly never recovered. He was reportedly surrounded by loved ones at the time of his passing, including his children, Jack and Sophie, fiancé Wendy Madison Bauer, ex-wife Minnie Sharp, mother Ann Bennett, step-father Steve Bennett, brother Tom Perry, and sister Amy Coder.

Born on October 11, 1966 in Mansfield, Ohio, Perry got his start in entertainment on the soap operas Loving and Another World before becoming a household name in 1990 as Dylan McKay on Beverly Hills, 90210. He most recently starred on the hit CW show Riverdale as Archie Andrews’ (KJ Apa) father.

“The family appreciates the outpouring of support and prayers that have been extended to Luke from around the world, and respectfully request privacy in this time of great mourning. No further details will be released at this time,” a rep for Perry told People magazine.

Perry’s fans and co-stars are posting tributes to him on social media in light of this news. “Thinking of you, Luke,” Lili Reinhart posted on Instagram before Perry’s passing three days ago. “And praying for your safe recovery.”

“So saddened by Luke Perry’s passing and I spent only five minutes experiencing his remarkable kindness and generosity of spirit; I cannot imagine how hard this must be for people who truly knew him,” wrote writer and performer Natalie Walker.

“Luke Perry was my first real crush,” tweeted singer Ingrid Michaelson. “I wrote him fan letters. I had posters of him. He was IT. He was my teenage dream. His passing at the age of 52 is truly devastating. My heart goes out to his family and loved ones.”

Even more social media tributes to Perry came from his fans:



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Karl Lagerfeld Has Passed Away at 85


Karl Lagerfeld, the longtime creative director of Chanel and Fendi, passed away in Paris on February 19. He was 85.

The German-born designer, who was raised outside of Hamburg, moved to Paris to work in fashion, under designers like Pierre Balmain, Jean Patou, and Chloé. He started at Fendi in 1965, where he would remain until his death. He took over Chanel in 1983.

“Everybody said, ‘Don’t touch it, it’s dead, it will never come back,'” Lagerfeld told the New Yorker in 2007 about the Chanel job. “But by then I thought it was a challenge.”

“When I took over, nobody talked about her [Coco Chanel],” he said to The Cut this past December. “I reinvented the references, but that’s a good thing, no? Everybody said to me, ‘Don’t touch it.’ It’s dead, because 35 years ago, old labels were old labels. Now everybody wants to revive a label, and some of them, I don’t think it’s a good idea. But this was before Tom Ford and Gucci.”

He was not only a mainstay of the fashion industry, but Lagerfeld was also one of the most prolific designers in the business. He designed around 10 collections a year for Chanel, typically stepping out at the end of his elaborate runway presentations—a small-scale Eiffel Tower, a supermarché, and a space station have been staged at the Grand Palais in Paris—to take a bow. (He skipped his most recent Métiers d’Arts show in New York and couture show in Paris, citing health reasons; Chanel’s creative studio director, Virginie Viard, represented him instead, on both occasions.) According to Business of Fashion, Chanel’s operating profit was $2.69 billion.

On a personal level, the designer had an instantly-recognizable look, which was part of his personal brand for decades: white collared shirt, black suit and tie, sunglasses, broche, and driving gloves. (It was a recurring element in his more affordable namesake line, Karl Lagerfeld Paris.) And though his work was celebrated, Lagerfeld attracted criticism over the years for his comments on topics such as immigration, #MeToo, and weight.

Designers like Donatella Versace, Victoria Beckham, and others have taken to social media to remember the designer.

Many of Lagerfeld’s muses, like Diane Kruger and Carla Bruni, also posted tributes.

Glamour has reached out to Chanel for comment and will update this story when we hear back.



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Penny Marshall Has Passed Away at 75 Years Old: A Look Back at Her Legacy


Penny Marshall, the legendary actress and director, has died at the age of 75.

Marshall first became a household name playing Laverne DeFazio on Laverne & Shirley, a show created by her older brother Garry Marshall, and appeared in various television shows and films over the years. But it’s her career as a director that will likely have the longest-lasting impact on not only Hollywood, but all of us who have loved her films.

“Our family is heartbroken over the passing of Penny Marshall,” a statement from her family read. “Penny was a tomboy who loved sports, doing puzzles of any kind, drinking milk and Pepsi together and being with her family. As an actress, her work on Laverne & Shirley broke ground featuring blue-collar women entertaining America in prime time. She was a comedic natural with a photographic memory and an instinct for slapstick. When Penny directed Tom Hanks in the movie Big she became a pioneer as the first woman in history to helm a film that grossed more than $100 million. She did it again with A League of Their Own. She directed many stars including Geena Davis, Robert De Niro, Whoopi Goldberg, Robin Williams, Madonna, Denzel Washington, Rosie O’Donnell and Whitney Houston. She even gave Mark Wahlberg his first acting job. Penny was a girl from the Bronx, who came out West, put a cursive ‘L’on her sweater and transformed herself into a Hollywood success story. We hope her life continues to inspire others to spend time with family, work hard and make all of their dreams come true.”

Below, we’ve rounded up some of the biggest moments in Marshall’s groundbreaking career.



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This Weird Samantha Plotline Might Be Why Kim Cattrall Passed on Sex and the City 3


We all cried into our cosmos a little when Sarah Jessica Parker confirmed there won’t be a Sex and the City 3 movie, despite rumors of a working screenplay. Things got even sadder after people started pointing fingers at Kim Cattrall, accusing the actress, who plays Samantha, of derailing the reboot because she chose to pass on the project.

Cattrall pushed back at the time, saying she simply wanted to move on from the role. Reports of a cast feud became so loud, though, that Cattrall’s costar Sarah Jessica Parker had to clarify that there’s no fight between the two.

And now, an E News source says tension between the cast really wasn’t the reason why Cattrall wasn’t on board with another Sex and the City reunion. Turns out, she reportedly wasn’t down with the screenplay. “Kim never wanted to really do the movie to begin with,” the source claims, according to E News. “It was a combination of not great money and a bad storyline for Samantha.”

Of course, this comes from an unnamed source—so take it with a grain of salt—but this insider claims the writers gave Samantha a weird story arc that involved sexts from Miranda’s teen son, Brady. As E News puts it, “Early in the film, Brady gets caught masturbating. He is also caught sending ‘dick pics’ of his erect penis to Samantha.” Yikes.

It seems that this plot would have happened in the midst of some massive, emotional developments with Carrie and Big. According to reports, the film called called for Carrie’s husband Mr. Big to die of a heart attack. This twist would have been incredibly intense and sad—and, if the source’s report is true, a strange juxtaposition to Samantha’s storyline.

Plus, remember that Cattrall has always maintained that she’s been ready to move on from the role for a while. Last year, she tweeted at a fan to check out her series Sensitive Skin on Netflix instead of watching SATC. She also shared with the Scottish newspaper The Daily Record that she felt the times had shifted since she portrayed the public relations powerhouse and self-proclaimed “try-sexual.”

“To have four women talking about shopping trips and spending $400 on shoes when people are having trouble putting food on the table? It doesn’t mean we don’t need that, but I think the pendulum swung in a different direction,” she said.

Related: Sarah Jessica Parker Says She Can’t Imagine Sex and the City 3 Without Kim Cattrall





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