When ABC announced that Becca Kufrin would be the next Bachelorette, Bachelor Nation was ecstatic, to put it mildly. We all watched as Arie Luyendyk Jr. cruelly dumped her on national TV—a breakup so infamous even Saturday Night Live parodied it—so who more deserving? Fans were rooting for this Bachelorette to find the love of her life—and, according to Kufrin, she did: She’s been engaged to the winner of her final rose since taping ended in early May.
But after Kufrin’s season of The Bachelorette premiered, startling truths about some of her suitors came to light. Most notably, Lincoln Adim’s conviction of indecent assault and battery. And then there’s front-runner Garrett Yrigoyen, who admitted to liking several bigoted memes on Instagram.
For the most part, though, Kufrin hasn’t had much to say about these controversies. She’s remained silent on Adim’s conviction. When asked about Yrigoyen’s social media history, she told E! News that “everyone is entitled to their own opinions, and…I would hope people would stay open and respect me but also stay open and respect these 28 guys that went along on the journey with me.”
Of course, as the season comes to a close, Kufrin is aware that she’ll have to answer tough questions. Following the taping of Men Tell All (which airs Monday, July 30), she sat down with Glamour to talk about her experience with Adim and more. Read on.
It’s been two months since you announced you’re engaged. How has your relationship with your fiancé changed since then?
Becca Kufrin: It’s just grown exponentially. We’ve just learned so much more about each other, and it’s just grown so much. I’m even happier.
Throughout this season you kept saying what a great group of guys you had, but certain things have come to light that we didn’t know about. Do you still stand by that?
Becca: I still stand by what I said, and I still think those guys are amazing. And you know, yes, some relationships were a lot stronger. I learned a lot more about each guy and each relationship, but I respect all of them and wish them all the happiness in the world.
PHOTO: ABC/Paul Hebert
Lincoln wasn’t at the Men Tell All taping, nor was he mentioned. Now that we know his history, did you ever feel unsafe with him on the show?
Becca: No. I’m always surrounded by people. There’s a lot of bodies around, and I never felt unsafe. He always treated me with respect. So, yeah…
Once the fantasy suite dates come around, you get more time alone to talk about important topics with the remaining guys. Do you talk about politics and social issues, and where they stand?
Becca: Oh yeah, we talked about everything. I felt like whether it was on camera or off camera, I didn’t hold anything back. I don’t think the guys [held] anything back either. So any questions we had were brought up.
In Monday’s episode you said that you’re in love with two guys. How do you know you made the right choice?
Becca: You know, it’s something unexplainable. It’s just something I felt in my heart. All of the guys were amazing, but [I had to think about] what one would last a lifetime and what one would make me happy when I’m 30 or 45 or 70 or 90. It was just something that I felt, and I had to follow that.
PHOTO: ABC/Paul Hebert
Looking back, who would you have kept around longer? Who would you have eliminated sooner?
Becca: Oh man. I mean…Grocery Store Joe is amazing. I actually bumped into him in Chicago, and he’s great. Trent wasn’t at Men Tell All, but he was a guy who was so funny and always kept me laughing those first few weeks. That being said, I think I made the right choice week by week and did what was right for me.
Caution: Spoilers ahead for the season premiere of The Bachelorette.
Hey, remember that time Arie Luyendyk Jr. proposed to Becca Kufrin on The Bachelor finale? But then changed his mind and broke up with her for another woman? Oh, and the whole thing was filmed for national television so Becca, everyone she knows, and a million strangers could watch her be completely blindsided? Of course you haven’t forgotten—not that ABC would ever let you. Even this season of The Bachelorette, of which Becca is the star, begins with a cold open of her sobbing as she stares at photos of her and Arie in happier times.
Seriously, how much are they going to put this woman through? Becca’s the lead and ostensibly here to find love, but they’re kicking off the season with shots of her wandering around the Minnesota snow talking about how she doesn’t know “what to do” now that she’s not engaged.
Luckily, the show transitions to a new narrative pretty quickly: The music swells as Becca says she’s ready to find love again. The replay her appearance on After the Final Rose, when she wore that amazing gold dress and waved at screaming fans. So triumphant! Now she’s posing with roses for photo shoots and laughing. She’s doing aerial yoga to get that Jennifer Aniston bod. She’s driving around in a luxe red convertible. She is ready to get her life!
“Bring on the men!” – Becca but also me.
Becca rolls up to The Bachelorette mansion in her hot new car and is greeted by her best (ABC approved) friends: former Bachelorettes Rachel Lindsay, JoJo Fletcher, and Kaitlyn Bristowe. They’re here for a “girl chat”—and to remind us viewers that this process “works.” That said, it is kind of incredible that they’re all still with the guys they picked on the show.
Their advice to Becca is basically this: Forget Arie because a bunch of hot, accomplished dudes are coming to a mansion to woo you. The attention is all on you, girl, so soak it up. The women also drop some shade that Bachelorettes are better pickers than the Bachelors because men are not as “intuitive.” They are not wrong. The proof is in the data!
“Please don’t edit this out: FUCK HIM.” – Rachel Lindsay, how I’ve missed you.
Before they leave, Rachel wants to sage the place because “a lot of dirty stuff went down in this mansion.” (I love you, Rachel, always.) Rachel gets it all: She sages the couch, she sages Becca’s ring finger, she even sages Becca’s vagina. Kaitlyn, meanwhile, is confused because she thinks it’s just “a big doobie.”
I’d like to see that play out more, but instead a smoke alarm goes off—so, everyone heads outside so JoJo can casually sip on her mimosa as she points out the place she first kissed Jordan. Honestly, I just want a full hour devoted to this madness.
JoJo makes a good point that she, Rachel, and Kaitlyn all gave their first impression roses to the guys they ended up picking; they also kissed their chosen guys on the first night. So, no pressure BECCA.
Sadly, this conversation comes to an end so we can transition to meeting some of the men. First up is Clay, a pro football player who says he doesn’t fit the stereotype of a professional athlete because he’s a “big sweetheart.” Then we have Garrett, a 29-year-old medical sales rep who reminds us 1,000 times in five seconds that he is from Reno, Nevada. He follows that with what I think is an impression of Chris Farley? (“Was that pretty good?” he asks. No.)
The real comedy comes with Jordan, a 26-year-old “professional model” who also makes a memorable appearance in this Glamour video, below:
Jordan gives us so many fantastic quotes during his segment that I think it’s best to include the highlights without commentary:
“My brand is the pensive gentleman. It could have a glass of scotch. He could have a book in his hand. He could have a flower in his hand giving to a lady.”
“The power is in the brows.”
“Modeling is so much more than being ridiculously good looking.”
“You’re talking gym year round, tan year round, salt spray year round. There’s so much involved. It’s taxing.”
“I started to realize that, you know, I’m so focused on myself that I’m really losing out on potentially sharing myself with someone else.”
“I’m so excited for Becca to be the Bachelorette. I could see Becca and I on a couch with sweats, a tub of chocolates, and watch a chick flick. Like, a lot of models won’t do that. I do that sometimes.”
So good. Sadly, though, we must move on…to a sane person: Lincoln is from Nigeria and seems like a catch. No red flags here, so keeping an eye on this one.
From Lincoln we go to Joe, who greets us in Chicago with a wink. He’s kinda cute, but then he opens his mouth and out comes the MOST Chi-CAH-go accent. I can’t explain it, but I am…deeply attracted? Blame it on my Midwestern upbringing, but this 31-year-old grocery store owner who says lame lines like, “See, I know my fruits and vegetables. I know tomatoes very good. Women? Not so lucky” is apparently it for me.
“I deal in produce but the one thing I haven’t produced yet is love.” – My dream man, I guess.
Joe jokes that there’s gotta be a woman out there for him because he’s too handsome. Is it me?
Ugh, we’ve got to move on: Here’s Jean Blanc, who loves nice watches, nice ties, and nice cologne. He has over 100 bottles! To him, cologne is “the essence of your soul.” K.
“She needs a man that smells good, and I’m going to blow her nose away.” – Jean Blanc. My god what people will say to be on reality tv.
I’d like to spend a lot more time learning about Jean Blanc’s cologne—sorry, his soul—but we shift to Colton. He was also a pro football player, but after an injury he had to quit. So, he started a foundation for kids with Cystic Fibrosis. His description of the work he’s doing is super emotional—and then they cut to his cute, very old dog and I’m sold. (Fun fact: According to People, he is Aly Raisman’s ex.)
Apparently The Bachelorette can’t top that, so it’s time to check in with Becca. She’s wearing a fabulous white halter neck gown—how very Meghan Markle!—and ready to do the damn thing. (Is she tired of saying that yet?)
First out of the limo is Colton, so clearly he’s getting the husband edit this season. They pop some confetti guns—to get this thing “poppin'”—and hug. Next is Grant, an electrician who tells Becca she deserves a lot of respect for what she went through, and then it’s Clay. He tells Becca she’d be the biggest catch of his life. It’s a sweet moment, but she gives an “aww” that sounds an awful lot like he’s already in the friend zone.
There’s a little more chemistry with Jean Blanc, who uses his time to teach Becca how to say “let’s do the damn thing” in French. The best part, though, is when he walks away and Becca says he smelled good. Bah! Maybe “colognoisseur” really is a thing!
Connor is next and gets down on one knee—the same move Becca did when she first met Arie—but she seems…not into it? Connor is followed by my Chicago beau Joe and, yes, I’m still charmed by him for reasons I can’t fully explain.
In fact, I’m so distracted by Joe that I miss John’s turn. Sorry, John! Oh well, I’ve already moved on emotionally to man bun Leo. He starts off with a full updo, but then lets his hair down as a knock-off version of “I’m Too Sexy” starts playing. Either I’m easy to please or it’s a genuinely great moment.
And the hits keep coming: Jordan comes out in a suit that took him six hours to pick out. As he walks away, Becca even comments that he has “fun” shoes. Jordan couldn’t have hoped for a better reaction because, “I wanted Becca to hear the tapping of the shoes I wore such is like the heartbeat of a gentleman.” (Yes, I played this line back several times and this nonsense is what he said.)
Jordan is confident he’ll stand out in the crowd of bros because he wore a gray suit. Cut to Rickey meeting Becca while wearing a gray suit. Then there’s Alex, who isn’t in a gray suit but Becca does compliment his tie.
Nick shows up in a racing suit and says, “I’m not a race car driver … What kind of bleep-bleep (asshole, I assume?) wears this?” So, I like Nick. Except he claims meeting Becca was “the hardest thing” he’s ever done in his life. Um, you’re a lawyer. What about literally any of your cases? What about law school? Getting out of a limo in a borrowed onesie is really it?
Meanwhile, Leo’s not impressed because he thinks it’s a bad idea to remind Becca of her ex. Someone tell that to Mike, who brings a full cardboard cut out of Arie. Becca says it’s “freaking her out,” and I’m with Leo on this one: We all want to forget Arie.
Moving on: Garrett rolls up in a minivan. He brought it because he wants to be a great dad someday. It’s a little weird to me, but Becca’s into it and I just want her to be happy. If that means a minivan-driving Reno resident, then go for it girl.
A quick check in with the guys in the mansion reveals they’re sizing each other up and sitting around talking about how great Becca looks.
“Did you see the sparkles on her dress too?” – This guy gets it.
Blake arrives on an ox because his feelings are already “as strong as an ox.” (More like “the producers have run out of ideas and somebody had a random lead on a ox so here we are.”)
Let’s just move on to Lincoln—like Blake, Lincoln met Becca on After the Final Rose. So did Chase, Darius, and Ryan, who we all meet in quick succession. The rest of the guys are pissy about it because she remembers these five, as if these guys really got any quality time with her.
Anyway, Chris Harrison must be ready to get to the drama because there’s then a quick montage through Christon, Wills, and Jason. There’s a brief pause when Kamil comes out and he asks her walk to him because he thinks relationships should be halfway. I don’t like it—this is her night, brah—and then he makes it worse by being like, “actually what about 60/40…for me.” It backfires, as it should.
The weirdness continues when Jake comes out of the limo next. Like Becca, he’s from Minneapolis and an acquaintance of hers; she’s thrown off by his arrival, but she doesn’t have much time to think it over because Trent shows up in an actual hearse. The line? He “literally died” when he heard she was the Bachelorette.
Meanwhile, Jordan is still shit-talking the other guys’ fashion choices. Especially Christian, who is not wearing a tie or socks with his loafers. According to Jordan, “This is not an occasion for that.”
Speaking of fashion, here is David in a chicken suit so he can caw “Beh-KAH” all night. Turns out, David did not plan ahead; there’s no suit or clothes under the chicken suit, so he’s completely committed to this lewk.
PHOTO: Paul Hebert
The last out of the limo is Chris, who came with a choir. Jordan, who says he’s really good at math, seems overly impressed that Chris fit 12 people in the limo.
Now that we’ve met all the men, Becca is ready to get this party started. After her toast, Connor pulls the first “Can I steal you for a minute?” Unfortunately, he immediately ruins the moment by popping a bottle of champagne and drinking straight out of the bottle before even offering her a glass or sip first. And you thought you had it bad at Teddi’s house, Dorit.
The rest of the night is a bit of a blur: Clay brought literal clay, so she’d remember his name. John reveals he’s the guy who made the app for Venmo (um, excuse me?), Christon does an impressive dunk over Becca’s head. Even more impressive is the line he gives after: “When a guys tells you he’d jump over the moon for you I mean it.”
Later, Becca chats with Joe (luv u), feels a connection with Blake, receives a bracelet from Lincoln, and gets a back massage from Nick. David, naturally, asks her to do the chicken dance before finally revealing his face. Good news: He’s hot enough to pull it off! Then Garrett shows her some fishing techniques. Becca says he reminds her of home because he’s a fisher and hunter, and that’s what the men in her family are into. She seems into him. Foreshadowing?
PHOTO: Paul Hebert
Joe, you charmer.
Things are almost going too well. Cue Chris, who reveals he has some dirt on another guy in the house. Apparently Chris knows Chase’s ex, and she’s been texting not-so-nice things about him. According to her, Chase isn’t there for the right reasons; he just likes “hanging out with his boys” and wants to revamp his marketing company. After asking a few guys for their advice, Chris decides to pull Chase aside to tell him about it. THIS WON’T GO WELL, which is why we pause for a commercial break.
When we return, Chris tells Chase about the texts. Chase’s excuse is that he only dated her for, like, two weeks so, you know, “women.” Eye roll, eye roll, eye roll. Chase decides he better get ahead of this, so he pull Becca aside to talk about it. She understandably is like, “Well, what did the texts say?” This makes Chase realize he never actually found out, so he brings Chris in to clear things up. The whole thing is weird, but it leads Becca to think about who else might not be here for the right reasons…
She asks Jake—the guy she knows through mutual friends—to talk. Turns out they’ve met a few times, but he’s never shown interest in her before. So why now? He avoids the question (why are you here?) and instead focuses on the fact that he only remembers meeting her once. She points out that’s factually not true, so he pivots to a new technique: telling her she needs to stop “hanging on” to whatever happened at this Christmas party. He claims he’s had a “really transformative year,” so she should give him a chance.
Instead, Becca’s like, dude, we’ve met multiple times and each time it was kind of nothing. Why waste her time, his time, and everyone else’s time? So with that, Jake is the first one to go home of the season. She tells the rest of the guys what happened, which the others all take as a wake-up call.
The remaining guys who haven’t talked to her yet get into action, including Wills who reveals he has a Harry Potter tattoo. Wow, I am in love. Becca, can you spare Wills and Joe? Please? I don’t think she’d miss them that much, given that the first impression rose goes to Garrett. She’s choosing him because he made her laugh and feel comfortable, and they kiss.
That means only one thing: It’s time for the rose ceremony.
“I can’t go home. It wouldn’t be fair to Becca.” – Jordan
“[I’m] looking out at a sea of highway patrol officers, you know, wondering if maybe she didn’t feel me.” – Leo
The sun is rising so Becca gets through the roses pretty quick. In addition to Garrett, Lincoln, Blake, Rickey, Jean Blanc, Christon, Clay, Wills, Connor, Jason, John, Ryan, Alex, Nick, Trent, Colton, David, Jordan, Leo, Mike, and Chris are all staying another week.
That means goodbye for Kamil, Chase, Christian, Darius, Grant, Jake, and my darling Joe. Sigh, it’s for the best. They all take it much better than the men of seasons past. The real drama comes in the preview for the rest of the season.
Coming up: Becca’s falling in love! There are tears! “I can’t believe what I just did what Arie did to me.” Lincoln is a liar and manipulator! Jordan is here to boost his modeling career! Colton is a virgin! “Cheers to you being a bitch!” Blake is bleeding! It all leads to a finale where Becca’s crying again!
If anyone deserves to find love in Bachelor Nation, it’s Becca Kufrin. The 28-year-old publicist from Minnesota went through a very public, very brutal breakup with Arie Luyendyk Jr. and had to deal with a loser ex on national TV. That’s why we’re all rooting for her to do the damn thing and be front and center when The Bachelorette returns on May 28. In fact, we’re so invested we’re going to help Becca out: The profiles of all the Bachelorette contestants were just made available on ABC.com, and we noticed a few red flags worth mentioning. See ’em all, below.
Just because you didn’t score an invite to Prince Harry and Meghan Markle’sroyal wedding on May 19 doesn’t mean you can’t dress like it. And now, there’s a new product out there that will make for the perfect compliment to the fascinator you’ve been holding onto in anticipation.
Becca Cosmetics’ newest highlighter, called “Royal Glow,” promises exactly what the implies: a glow worthy of a royal. The shimmery pressed powder comes in a warm golden honey shade infused with pink pearl. The best part, though, is that the center of the palette is stamped with a crown, and looking at that every time you put on your makeup can be considered a consolation prize for not being able to catching a glimpse of Markle’s tiara IRL.
PHOTO: Courtesy of Becca Cosmetics
Buy It: Becca Cosmetics Highlighter in Royal Glow Becca Cosmetics, $38
If you want to go all out on the royal wedding inspired makeup (on May 19, or any other day), you can also paint your lips with Charlotte Tilbury K.I.S.S.I.N.G in Nude Kate, which was inspired by Kate Middleton, or opt for Markle’s favorite shade, Charlotte Tilbury Matte Revolution lipstick in Very Victoria.
PHOTO: Courtesy of Nordstrom
Buy It: Charlotte Tilbury K.I.S.S.I.N.G in Nude Kate, Nordstrom, $34
PHOTO: Courtesy of Nordstrom
Buy It: Charlotte Tilbury Matte Revolution lipstick in Very Victoria Nordstrom, $34
The highlighter, which launched last week, was originally only available at John Lewis, a London-based department store. But thankfully, Becca knows the royal fascination extends well across the pond and all us Anglophiles can now get it on beccacosmetics.com. We might not be fully awake this Saturday morning when the royal wedding kicks off, but at least our cheekbones can look like it until the caffeine kicks in.
Since its first New York Fashion Week show in 2016, Chromat has been an important voice in the industry’s size-inclusivity conversation. Its casting is always notably, radically diverse, with models of all shapes and backgrounds making their way down the runway in the brand’s futuristic swimsuits, as designer Becca McCharen-Tran envisioned them.
And though shoppers could find its full size run on the brand’s e-commerce, the retailers who stocked Chromat would usually stop buying the collections at large. That all changes this summer: In March, McCharen-Tran announced that Nordstrom had made a substantial buy from her Fall 2018, including the first order for Chromat swimsuits in sizes up to 3X. This year, more and more people can become #CHROMATBABES.
“It’s major,” the designer tells Glamour at the Savannah College of Art and Design’s SCADstyle conference, where she was speaking on a panel. “Our wholesale accounts dictate what goes into production and what kind of lives and dies on the runway—basically what you’ll see once and never see again.”
Before the Nordstrom buy, there was a disconnect between what people saw at Fashion Week and what actually ended up on racks in stores. “We’ve been in Barneys for a long time and they’ve really supported us over the years, but their size ends at large,” she explains. To have a major stockist invest in its larger offerings represents something much more monumental: “Nordstrom is for sure at the forefront of size inclusivity in retail, so I do see that, finally, that consumer is getting more options in the high fashion space.”
PHOTO: Noam Galai
A model on the runway at Chromat’s Fall 2018 show.
Shortly after McCharen-Tran revealed the Nordstrom news, Refinery29 reported on behind-the-scenes images of Chromat’s swim production process (posted to the brand’s Instagram Story), including the 2X fit mannequins the team uses to make its size-inclusive swimsuits.
“People really responded to [the mannequins] and I was like, ‘I’ve seen this before!'” McCharen-Tran tells us. “That one picture of that curvy mannequin got re-posted on so many other accounts.”
The designer procured hers at Alvanon, a New York-based company that uses aggregate data including sizing and body scans to create the figure. “We’d been getting fit feedback for years from the curve models that walked for us on the runway, and other friends and fit models that we work with on our plus size patterns,” McCharen-Tran says of how she landed on the 2X shape.
PHOTO: Noam Galai
A model on the runway at Chromat’s Fall 2018 show.
Alvanon made two mannequins for Chromat: a standard-size medium (used for measuring sizes extra small through large) and a 2X (for sizes extra large through 3X). The designer is also ensuring that the factory producing Chromat’s size-inclusive swim run understands the nuances of making a garment for different body shapes: “There [are] a lot of different little techniques, like making the straps wider for bigger sizes or adding a kind of power mesh into some places so [there’s] more compression if that’s what you want.”
The online reaction to Chromat’s mannequins highlighted another aspect of the inclusive fashion conversation that hasn’t received as much attention as, say, body-diverse runways: the lack of resources for designers who want to make their garments for a wider range of customers—mannequins, patterns, manufacturers, and so forth. And McCharen-Tran believes the access to should start with design students: “I think in the school process and educational process, those mannequins need to start there and continue.”
PHOTO: Noam Galai
A model on the runway at Chromat’s Fall 2018 show.
At the moment, fashion schools are only just starting to incorporate body forms for non-sample size garments. (“Even [on my visit] at SCAD, I didn’t seen any plus-size mannequins,” McCharen-Tran notes.) Though, the need is becoming apparent for some institutions: “I remember going to Parsons and asking about their sizes, and they are starting to add more 16’s and 18’s within the educational program to where students can kind of drape on different bodies,” she says.
With the news of the Nordstrom buy and the excitement surrounding Chromat’s curvy mannequins, McCharen-Tran hopes that perceptions of plus-size bodies will continue to evolve, along with the products available to them in stores.
“I think it’s the stigma around plus size that needs to be abolished, not the definition itself,” she says. “I think people will always need to know what size range is available no matter what you call it. Hopefully, the stigma around larger bodies in the fashion industry at large is changing. That’s what really needs to be exploded and expanded upon.”
The Savannah College of Art and Design paid for the writer’s travel and accommodations for the purpose of writing this story.
Before we begin our recap of tonight’s The Bachelor episode, I ask for your patience if my thoughts seem scattered. You see, I just learned that Hot Peter will not be joining The Bachelor Winter Games—even though Mike Fleiss promised he would—and I’m still shook. I’ll rise above it, but barely.
But let’s move on (and consider this your spoiler warning): The episode starts with Arie rolling up to the mansion on a motorcycle while the girls sit around and chat about how attracted they are to him. Excellent performances, all—I consider your lack of Golden Globes to be a snub. Chris Harrison shows up and tells the women, “The hope is that just one of you will become Arie’s wife.” The way he pauses, it makes me wonder…is there a chance…that…multiple women could become Arie’s wives? I certainly hope not, but with this show you never really know.
Becca K. gets the first one-on-one date, and it’s starting ASAP. She doesn’t even have time to go wash her face because Arie is here with his motorcycle jacket and bland face, and they’re off! The women all come outside to wave goodbye, but I would totally be the one to use that opportunity to run for the showers. I can’t imagine hot water lasts very long when you have 20+ women bunking up.
Arie brings Becca K. to a house filled with lobster tails and a chocolate fountain. This is already my idea of a dream date (just replace Arie with Oscar Isaac). It gets better: Rachel Zoe is there to style her, and Becca gets to pick something “special” to wear later. Arie says he’ll leave them to it and heads to the other room. A date that includes alone time? Wow, the thrills keep on comin’. After Becca’s tried everything on, Arie reveals she can keep it all (!!!). She swoons. I get it.
The gifts aren’t over yet, though: Arie presents her with sparkly Louboutin heels. Damn. OK, I see your game here, ABC. You needed to sell Arie to me, and you’ve won me over with shoes and light bites. Ugh, I’m so predictable.
“Your eyes, like, suck people in…I think.” — Becca K., so romantic
A mysterious man appears and says Neil Lane sends his regards. Wait, she’s getting jewels too?!? Unreal. To go with her outfit, Becca K. is given a diamond necklace and earrings to wear. She and Arie kiss because this dude just threw thousands of dollars of merch at her. “The girls didn’t lie when they said he has pillow lips,” Becca declares.
After, Becca goes back to the mansion with her shopping bags in hand and new shoes on her feet. The women literally start chugging rosé they are so jealous, and Bibiana cries when she sees the beautiful shoes. “Oh my God, they’re going to get married,” she wails. Um, there’s still weeks and weeks of this show to go. I don’t think Arie’s made up his mind just because Becca wears a sample size. Well, then again, this is Arie.
After the commercial break, Becca and Arie begin the “sit and pretend to eat” portion of the date. Over candlelight, they discuss cars (of course), Arie’s time on The Bachelorette, his gray hair, and Becca’s former relationship. She shares a sad story about her father’s death, and Arie responds with vague statements like, “Family’s important.” He then gives her the rose and reveals she gets to keep the effing Neil Lane diamond earrings. God, this girl lucked the fuck out. They kiss and whisper into each others’ mouths, “I like kissing you.”
Back at the mansion, Krystal receives the next one-on-one date card. She gets serious death stares, and I recommend she cleanses that house with sage, stat. For her one-on-one date, Arie is taking Krystal to his hometown of Scottsdale, Arizona. We see all the sights: the Pizza Hut where Arie worked, the tree where he had his first kiss, and his high school. He makes a point of calling out where “the art nerds were,” so that’s the kind of guy Arie is. Then Arie takes Krystal to his house, and she already starts thinking what it’d be like to move in. They look at family photo albums, and he opens up about how his grandfather was his role model because he was a “total man’s man.” I’ll refrain from a long discussion on toxic masculinity, but I will say this: Arie, we all know the cars are compensating for something. We. All. Know. The trip to Scottsdale ends with Krystal meeting his entire family. I’m sure they were thinking, “WTF,” but they hid it well.
We check back in with the women at the mansion: The next day will bring a group date with Maquel, Marikh, Tia, Valerie, Annaliese, Lauren G., Kendall, Bekah M., Jenny, Seinne, Jenna, Caroline, Brittany T., Bibiana, and Chelsea.
“I’m trying to be cool and, like, impress you a little bit,” – Arie
revealing his hand
Krystal and Arie’s date continues with a non-meal in Los Angeles. She reveals that her parents divorced when she was young. “I just really felt like my parents didn’t want me,” she explains. Because of this, growing up was hard. She shares a moving story about how she saved up all her money when she was young to buy a comforter because her mom couldn’t. She also ended up being the caretaker for her little brother. But for the past several months, he’s been living on the streets and refuses her help. Naturally, it breaks Krystal’s heart. Arie dries her tears and says “it’s not your fault.” He gives her the rose, she accepts, and they have a teary make out. From there, they get a private concert from Connor Duermit. Who is this man? According to Google, he’s a self-described “pop-soul” singer. I don’t know if that clears it up, but, eh, there have been worse performers on this show.
The next morning, Krystal recaps her date for the gals…well, kind of. She plays coy, and everyone calls her out for being vague.
“When you’re like that, you seem shady.” – Bibiana
They don’t have long to be mad, though: It’s time for the group date. Arie drives up and does some spins. (My God, can we have one episode without cars or racing?) The challenge today is demolition derby: If your car stops running, you are out. Tia’s excited because “people in Arkansas actually do this. Like, for fun.” Before the derby begins, the women decorate their cars with spray paint. Some fun slogans are added to the cars, including my personal favorite: “Look alive, bitches.”
But not everybody is having fun. Annaliese is crying because she had a “traumatic” experience with bumper cars as a kid. “I just remember being so alone and so scared,” she says. Nobody seems to have much sympathy for poor Annaliese, though. There are a lot of eye rolls and complaints that her tears gave her more alone time with Arie, who came over to comfort her. Jenny in particular is ruthless.
“Give her further trauma.” – Jenny
Once the derby begins, Annaliese manages to overcome her tears long enough to t-bone Chelsea’s car. So this is what it takes to finally make her smile. Bibiana is declared a “monster” by Chris Harrison. As more and more cars crash I think to myself, “This looks fun.” At first, it seems like Brittany will win, but Seinne ends up the champion. She wins a trophy, milk (this is a tradition apparently?), and alone time with Arie. I’d just take the milk, TBH.
Following a quick change into cocktail dresses, the group date after party begins. Chelsea grabs Arie immediately for alone time; the others seem surprised about this, but this is Chelsea’s M.O. Once she has Arie to herself, Chelsea reveals that she has a son. He says he’s totally open to it, and they make out HARD. Next, Arie talks to Seinne. He’s very shocked that she went to Yale and immediately recognizes that she’s out of his league. They kiss.
“I barely graduated high school and worked at Pizza Hut.” – Arie
By the end of the night, Bibiana is cranky as hell and refusing to talk to Arie. She’s tired, annoyed with everyone around her, and ready to call it a night so she storms off and slams a door. Been there, done that. It’s like holding a mirror up to myself! Meanwhile, Bekah delivers the smoothest line I’ve seen. She straight-up asks Arie, “Wanna kiss?” They make out for a while, but it’s Seinne who ultimately gets the group date rose.
With two-thirds of the episode over, it’s time for the pre-rose ceremony cocktail hour to begin. Arie makes a little award for Brittany for being the “most hardcore.” Even though this was obviously a producer’s idea, it’s charming. Bekah and Arie sneak off to make out. She’s waring a fabulous fur coat, and I think I love her.
Tonight’s drama will clearly revolve around Krystal, who pisses everyone off because she talks to Arie twice in the night. This honestly might throw Bibiana over the edge. She goes off on Krystal for interrupting her time with Arie while the other women snicker in the background. Krystal doesn’t seem too worried about it, though. After all, she’s the one with a rose.
And with that, the rose ceremony begins: Maquel, Jacqueline, Bekah M., Jenna, Chelsea, Lauren S., Tia, Annaliese, Lauren B., Kendall, Brittany, Ashley, Marikh, Caroline, and Bibiana are all here to stay another week.
Jenny takes the breakup hard. “I’m not sad about you, I’m sad about leaving my friends,” she tells Arie. Wow, what delightful shade. “He literally picked a taxidermist over me,” she grouses as she heads off into the night. Mic drop.
Next week: Tears! And this quote, “I’m going to kill Krystal.”
