In her new memoir, Becoming, Michelle Obama reveals that she suffered a miscarriage in her 30s and experienced fertility issues while trying to have children with her husband, former president Barack Obama. Ultimately, the couple conceived their daughters, Sasha and Malia, through in vitro fertilization—something Michelle dealt with largely on her own as Barack was away serving the state legislature. As the former First Lady details in her book, she had to administer the shots that are a part of in vitro fertilization many times herself.
Michelle opened up more about this experience to Robin Roberts on Good Morning America Friday (November 9). “I felt like I failed because I didn’t know how common miscarriages were because we don’t talk about them,” she said. “We sit in our own pain, thinking that somehow we’re broken.”
She continued, “That’s one of the reasons why I think it’s important to talk to young mothers about the fact that miscarriages happen.”
In the interview, Michelle says she realized the “biological clock is real” around age 34 or 35 and that “egg production is limited.” “We had to do IVF,” Michelle told Roberts.
Ultimately, Michelle hopes opening up about her struggles will help other women going through similar experiences. “I think it’s the worst thing that we do to each other as women, not share the truth about our bodies and how they work,” she said.
Becoming will hit bookstores and E-reader platforms everywhere on Tuesday, November 13. Click here to look at tickets for Michelle’s upcoming book tour in support of the project.
The new Halloween, a direct sequel to the 1978 film, touches and expands on many of the themes of the original. This time, though, the action is less about masked killer Michael Myers and more about the trifecta of Strode women living in Haddonfield: Laurie Strode (Jamie Lee Curtis), the iconic final girl who survived Myers’ massacre forty years earlier; Laurie’s estranged daughter Karen (Judy Greer), who is as afraid of Laurie as Laurie is of Michael; and Karen’s teen daughter, Allyson (newcomer Andi Matichak).
Caution: Major spoilers about Halloween start here.
Allyson is a character trope horror fans will recognize: She’s a smart, kind, and pretty high schooler with a good head on her shoulders. Obviously, this means all of her more morally compromised friends are about to be murdered. Allyson wants a relationship with her estranged grandmother, Laurie, but Karen does everything she can to keep them apart. Why? Because Laurie never moved on from that tragic Halloween night. She essentially raised Karen in a kill-or-be-killed bootcamp so intense the state took her away at the age of twelve. Now, Laurie lives in a fortress-style compound, shooting at mannequins all day and self-medicating with alcohol. Karen says Laurie projected her own paranoia onto her. Laurie says she was willing to sacrifice being loved by Karen to prepare her for the horrors of the world. I say, inherited trauma much?
Halloween is the story of Allyson’s induction into the long lineage of women who face the cruelty of the world and make it out the other side tougher and wiser.
This is tricky for Allyson; her parents raised her to believe in a world full of love and light, so she doesn’t have a great bullshit detector. She’s constantly disappointed because she trusts the wrong people. Halloween is the story of her induction into the long lineage of women who face the cruelty of the world and make it out the other side tougher and wiser. Karen wants her daughter to believe that Laurie is a monster, because Laurie was a monster to her. But once October 31st comes around, Allison learns who the real bad guys are.
First, a betrayal: Allyson’s boyfriend kisses another girl at the high school dance, then gets defensive about it. Next, a threat: A male friend offers to walk her home from the dance, then tries to kiss her even after she protests. He apologizes, but still whines that he only did it because the hot girls at the dance made him horny and he’s too drunk to know what he’s doing. Sound familiar? As if that wasn’t warning enough to teach Allyson that something is rotten in Haddonfield, that guy is soon killed by Michael. When she stumbles upon the body, Michael sees her see the corpse. The message is clear, and one that women have to learn over and over again: If you get just a little too drunk, if you wander just a little too far, if you are anything less than completely cautious at night, it can all go bad so quickly. Stay sharp.
After this, Allyson is “rescued” by Michael’s doctor—the “new Loomis”—and a cop who’s been working the case. That too ends in chaos, and Allyson is yet again left alone with no protection.
Eventually, the action culminates with a final confrontation between the three women and Michael at Laurie’s compound. The centerpiece of Laurie’s house is a basement bunker, where some revelations are made. Karen finally understands why Laurie raised her the way she did, Allyson understands why Karen hated Laurie, and they all love each other. Oh, and they’re ready to kick some ass.
PHOTO: Universal / Alamy Stock Photo
While Allyson and Karen hide in the bunker, Laurie goes hunting for Michael; they tussle, and Laurie falls out the window. She’s seen lying on the ground, but when Michael looks again she’s disappeared. The moment is a recreation of a famous scene from the original, with Laurie in Michael’s place. The message: She may have become a bit monstrous herself because of Michael, but she also gained a bit of his power.
Michael finds the hidden entrance to the bunker and tries forcing it open. Beneath him, Karen tells Allyson to get back, then takes up the mantle she never wanted: a rifle. She aims it up the steps as Michael breaks through, but he won’t show his face. Karen starts to shake. “Mom! I can’t do it! I’m scared! I’m not strong enough,” she yells. At this, Michael steps into the light. Karen smiles. “Gotcha.” Bang.
The lesson: Daughters can inherit strength and power along with trauma. Michael Myers’ assumption of female fragility is his undoing.
Laurie appears out of the shadows, and the three women trap Michael in the bunker. They light the house on fire and glow like a modern-day Hecate. Woe to all men who cross them. Michael and the compound—the walls Laurie built out of her fear, pain, anger, and desperation—burn to the ground.
This movie takes place on Halloween, but I’d consider watching it on Mother’s Day.
I don’t want to push the metaphor too far and tell you that the house is “the patriarchy” or that the Strode ladies took back the night. Michael is not the personification of gendered violence; he is an indiscriminate killing machine. He was born bad. There is, as Laurie says, a boogieman, and he’s going to get you. Unless…you get your mom to help.
Everyone Allyson trusted disappointed her, betrayed her, or couldn’t save themselves, let alone save her. Except for Karen. All the dads and cops and neighbors and friends in the world couldn’t do what her mother did. The one person who could keep Allyson alive was Karen, and the one person who kept Karen alive was Laurie. That’s it. This is the thesis of Halloween: Not my daughter, you dick.
This movie takes place on Halloween, but I’d consider watching it on Mother’s Day. It’s a tribute to the many ironies of the mother-daughter relationship. Moms are so annoying! They give you all their issues; they’re often critical, smothering, guilt-tripping, and basically screw you up no matter what. But if you’ve got a good one, she won’t let anyone else mess with you at all. There are no answers when it comes to the why or the how of Michael, of evil, of pain. There’s only an answer to the question of what are we going to do about it. And that answer is: fight. And call your mom.
Elizabeth Logan has written for Reductress, McSweeney’s, and The Huffington Post. Follow her on Twitter @lizzzzzielogan.
Meghan Markle was bestowed the title Duchess of Sussex by Queen Elizabeth II on her wedding day to Prince Harry. She’s the first woman to ever hold that title, and according to People, she’ll be the last—unless some major change happens ASAP.
The magazine reports that if Markle and Prince Harry have any daughters together, they won’t be able to call themselves Duchesses of Sussex (say that five times fast), nor will they get to carry on Markle’s Scottish title of Countess of Dumbarton or her Northern Irish moniker, Baroness Kilkeel. Any sons they have together, however, will be able to inherit their father’s titles of Duke of Sussex, Earl of Dumbarton, and Baron Kilkeel. The reason why, you ask? An ancient (and archaic) peerage law that says only male children can inherit titles. The British news site Express confirms this, as well.
The ancient peerage laws governing family inheritances have been changed before, however. Most recently, Queen Elizabeth introduced the Succession to the Crown Act in 2013, which rules that the next king or queen of the U.K. will be decided by birth order only, rather than biological sex. As a result, Princess Charlotte is able to retain her position as fourth in line to the throne, rather than dropping down to fifth upon the birth of her younger brother, Prince Louis.
Unfortunately, the 2013 ordinance applies only to the direct line to the throne, so it would take yet another law change to allow Prince Harry and Markle’s daughters to automatically inherit their titles. Unless the monarch at that point assigns them any additional honorary titles, their children will be called Lords and Ladies of Mountbatten-Windsor, according to The Independent. Meanwhile, because Prince William is the oldest son of the Prince of Wales, his children will all be titled Princes and Princesses, due to yet another recent rule tweak by Queen Elizabeth.
These peerage laws, which give boys priority over their sisters no matter their birth order, have been around since the 17th century, and apply to U.K. citizens well beyond the royal family. Just last year, for example, the eldest daughter of a baron was denied her claim to her late father’s title and 6,000 acres of land. According to The Telegraph, since Robin Neville, the 10th Baron Braybrooke, had seven daughters and no sons, his title went instead to a distant male cousin.
Imagine it’s a Tuesday at work, and you get up, walk into your boss’s office, and say thanks, but you’re quitting your job to travel the world, photograph women, and tell their stories. The road calls, you have a camera, and you’re not telling it no. It’s the dream, right? That’s essentially the pared-down story of Mihaela Noroc, photographer and the author behind The Atlas of Beauty: Women of the World in 500 Portraits. In honor of Mother’s Day, Noroc has put together a series spotlighting the mothers she’s encountered across the globe.
Pregnant herself, Noroc says traveling through Asia over the past few months has only motivated her to keep going. “There are many more stories waiting to be discovered and now, as a mother, I feel an even stronger desire to bring my small contribution in making this world a better place for future generations.” After her daughter arrives, Noroc says she’ll be continuing the project and bringing her daughter with her. “I’m excited that I’ll be able to show her the world and its wonderful women,” she says. “I think we both have many things to learn from them.”
Ahead, she’s captured glimpses into the lives of 17 mothers around the world. The amount of context Noroc can provide around each portrait changes, she says, based on how much time she can spend with the women and their children. The single thoroughfare? “There’s always an intimate chemistry between them,” Noroc says. “And there’s always so much beauty and kindness in these special moments.”
As a lot of commentators have pointed out recently—following a wave of admonishments from celebrities saying that “as fathers of daughters” they were appalled by Harvey Weinstein’s behavior—a man shouldn’t need a daughter to teach him that sexual harassment is wrong and that feminism is necessary.
But it couldn’t hurt.
Sham Hinchey and Marzia Messina are photographers creative partners, and the parents of a 10-year-old girl, Penelope. She inspired their most recent project, “Dear Daughters,”, which brought 22 men and their young daughters into their Brooklyn studio to talk about feminism and have their portraits taken.
PHOTO: Sham Hinchey and Marzia Messina
Vida and Ray
“We really wanted to hear men talk on the question of feminism and women’s rights and the role of a woman in the society,” Hinchey told Glamour. “We thought a good place to start was with fathers who have daughters, because it might be easier for them to empathize with their young daughter so they could kind of learn through them.”
With the help of Penelope, Hinchey and Messina designed a board game to guide the discussion. It started with softball questions: “What do you think you’ll be doing when you’re 25?” and “What was life like when you were a kid?” As the game progressed, they moved on to more challenging stuff: “What do you think the phrase ‘boys will be boys’ suggests?” or “Pretend you’re in Congress and come up with a new law about women’s rights.”
PHOTO: Sham Hinchey and Marzia Messina
Amira and Max
Sometimes, the game was illuminating because it encouraged girls to describe the world from their perspective. At other times, fathers were forced to explain a hard truth about the world to their daughters, which underscored the injustice of it for everyone. If a girl hadn’t heard the word “stereotype” before, her father had to explain what stereotyping is, why it’s wrong, and how it might affect her.
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Hinchey and Penelope took their turn with the game as well. He said that even though he and Penelope are close and both care about women’s rights, it felt good to have this kind of frank discussion with her. “We always delegate those kinds of conversations to the mom,” he says. “But if we do put ourselves in that place as dads, it can strengthen our relationship with our kids. And I think that putting men in women’s shoes for a while—that’s how we get them on board with the movement for equality.”
The family hopes to expand their project with more fathers and daughters from across the country, and to eventually publish a book featuring their conversations and photos.
From Oprah Winfrey as “The Titan” to Shonda Rhimes as “The Showrunner,” the women in TIME‘s new “Firsts: Women Who Are Changing The World” feature are shattering barriers and glass ceilings in their respective fields. Among the dozens of game-changers is Counselor to the PresidentKellyanne Conway. Her title? “The Adviser.” Her position is one that’s raised more than a few eyebrows, and questions, along the way—including ones from her daughters about why their mom didn’t support the first female presidential candidate from a major party. (Hillary Clinton, of course, is also included in the feature as “The Nominee.”)
In a video interview with TIME, Conway mentions that her gender was always a point of interest as she started a career in Republican politics 20 years ago. “There were few women consultants; there were few women candidates; there were certainly few women congressmen and officeholders,” she said. “I have described [it] as walking into the men’s locker room at the Elks Club, holding a bachelor party.”
Once she learned how to “think like a man and to behave like a lady,” as she put it—which speaks to just how much we need more women in politics, no?—she started to feel more comfortable in her role. But she was, and still is, a minority in politics. So it’s not surprising that her children wanted to know “why Mommy, who’s a woman, did not support the first female presidential candidate from a major party.”
“I would tell them that I respect very much that Secretary Clinton was running for president, and it showed that in this country anybody can do anything if they set their mind to it. At the same time, I tried to explain to them that you could be excited for someone with whom you disagree and share in that moment in history as a proud American,” Conway said. “We are making our own choices and really making history every day—but yet making history in the fact that we are increasingly in control.”
In an interview last year she told Glamour that, “I relish the idea of a female president in my lifetime. True feminism means you’re strong and independent enough to stand on your own. It motivates me to say that I’m for a woman, but not that woman. I’m like many American women in that we say Hillary Clinton shares our agenda but not necessarily our life experience, our vision, or our values.”
