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90 Day Fiancé's History: How the TLC Reality Show Became a Cultural Phenomenon


Orstein: For that first season, we didn’t know who we were looking for outside of people who were engaging, had interesting backstories, were willing to be totally transparent and authentic. We looked at Russ and Pao very early and were intrigued by them. We felt they jumped off the screen and had a really interesting story to tell about how she was going to be acclimating to life in Oklahoma. That was so different from the life she knew in Colombia. They caught our attention from the get-go.

Paola Mayfield: For me, filming the show [coincided with] my first time in the U.S. When I arrived in the U.S. on my K-1 visa, I also hadn’t seen Russ in forever. So I arrived at the airport in the U.S. and all I knew was life in Colombia.

I felt like I would have time to get ready after I got off the plane, but when I landed Russ was there and the cameras were waiting. I thought, “Oh my gosh—I’m so nervous.” I felt like, “What am I supposed to do now?”

Adler: They had already invested time and money in their love. When we got those first cuts back, it was raw and authentic.

That first season, we almost wondered if it was too authentic. You’re watching these individuals who don’t know each other that well sitting in their living room talking to each other, trying to figure their life out. They’re not screaming and yelling; they’re not in some big, beautiful house. It was like, “Is this too real?”

But we just decided to lean into the real. Other networks wouldn’t have done that. Other networks would have said, “We need to brighten up this world. We need to make them look nicer, make their house look nicer, make them look more interesting.” The people we cast were going through something authentic. The stresses and triggers of the 90-day process—we thought, let’s sit back and watch it play out and not feel pressured to tell them to be louder or flashier. Let’s just work with who people really are.

Russ Mayfield: We had no idea what to expect when it came to filming. It got frustrating, because we wanted to be spending time together but there were always cameras around. I always wanted to do my best and look my best. So we just went with the flow. The amount of filming we did compared to what aired was frustrating—how much we worked, versus what was presented.

A Slow Start

Ornstein: I think we all had a feeling that we had something special from the early days, once we got into production and started looking at the material. It did very well that [first] season, but it wasn’t this instant smash hit. It grew.

Sharp: If you’re watching Twitter, you can see when America is watching a show. This didn’t start as a juggernaut. When we started production for season two, we were trying to think about how to tell different stories.

Adler: Season two brought the game-changing couple of Danielle and Mohamed.

[Mohamed Jbali, then 26, met Danielle Mullins, 41, in a chat room. He moved from Tunisia to Ohio to marry her, but viewers—and Mullins’ family—were skeptical of his intentions. Jbali, meanwhile, felt misled by her tenuous financial situation.]

When we sent their casting tape to Matt, I thought he was going to say this was a no-go. We were looking at them and thinking, “Huh—we haven’t told this story yet.” We try to document both sides. In that storyline, Mohamed very clearly felt he was misled by Danielle. Whatever people might believe about his original intentions, he continues to insist that he came to America thinking certain things about Danielle and her finances and her world. He has a certain point.



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Kim Kardashian’s New Shapewear Brand Is Being Accused of Cultural Appropriation


Earlier this week Kim Kardashian West announced she’d be launching yet another new business venture: an affordable, size-inclusive shapewear line.

“Finally I can share with you guys this project that I have been developing for the last year. I’ve been passionate about this for 15 years,” she wrote on Instagram. “I would always cut up my shapewear to make my own styles, and there have also been so many times I couldn’t find a [shapewear] color that blended with my skin tone, so we needed a solution for all of this.”

Many were excited about the range of the collection: pieces going up to a 4XL, available in nine different shades, priced accessibly. However, in the days since her reveal, there has been backlash bubbling up on the Internet because of the brand’s name, Kimono.

People have accused Kardashian West of cultural appropriation over the name of her shapewear line. There’s even a hashtag: #KimOhNo.

“Wow, @KimKardashian. Thanks for BUTCHERING Japanese culture!!! My culture is not your plaything.” one Twitter user wrote. “You don’t have any respect for people who are not your family, do you? In the 15 yrs developing this project, couldn’t you find a cultural advisor?”

“The year is 2039. A child is asked what a kimono is. They reply with “Kim Kardashian’s shapewear range.” And there begins the gradual erasure & dilution of the kimono’s rich cultural history for future generations. One of many reasons why trademarking it is NOT OKAY #KimOhNo,” another said.



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Ariana Grande Has Some Thoughts for People Who Say Her Tattoo Is Cultural Appropriation


Ariana Grande took to Twitter this week to write a now deleted thread addressing people who think her new tattoo written in Japanese kanji is cultural appropriation.

If you’re unfamiliar with this story, here’s a quick recap: It all unfolded last week, when Grande posted a picture of some new hand ink she received to commemorate her song “7 Rings.” However, social media users quickly pointed out that while the tattoo intended to say “7 Rings,” it actually read shichirin, or “small Japanese barbecue grill.” Grande took the incident in stride, admitting she left off a symbol because it was too painful to finish. “It hurt like fuck n still looks tight. I wouldn’t have lasted one more symbol lmao,” she wrote at the time.

She then attempted to fix the ink but it still didn’t read 100 percent correctly.

For some, this incident was more than just a funny faux pas. Several social media users alleged Grande’s tattoo is a form of cultural appropriation, and a few also said the Japanese writing on her website merchandise was insensitive.

But in a series of now deleted tweets, Grande responded to users who called her out. “I can’t read or write kanji obviously,” she tweeted to a person who urged her to apologize, saying that she has “many a time.” “What do you want me to do? It was done out of love and appreciation. What do you want me to say?”

She continued, “U kno how many people make this mistake and DON’T care just cause they like how it looks? Bruh… I care sooooo much. What would u like me to do or say? Forreal. There is a difference between appropriation and appreciation. My Japanese fans were always excited when I wrote in Japanese or wore Japanese sayings on my clothing. However, all of the merch with Japanese on it was taken down from my site not that anyone cared to notice.”

Ariana Grande Has Some Thoughts for People Who Say Her Tattoo Is Cultural Appropriation
Ariana Grande Has Some Thoughts for People Who Say Her Tattoo Is Cultural Appropriation

In a final note before she deleted the tweets, Grande suggested the situation was affecting her anxiety. “I have crippling anxiety lol. I don’t like hurtin ppl,” she wrote. “People on this app really don’t know how to be forgiving or gentle when someone has made an innocent mistake. No one considers feelings other than their own. It’s very pointless. Ion [I don’t] even know why I’m talking ab[out] this anymore.”

Ariana Grande Has Some Thoughts for People Who Say Her Tattoo Is Cultural Appropriation

This was a much lengthier response than what Ariana Grande gave to TMZ after the website reported she was offered a $1.5 million deal to remove her tattoo. “I’ll give y’all a million to get off my nuts,” she wrote.





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This Is What the Beauty of Cultural Appreciation Looks Like


I was four when I was initiated into the powwow circle to dance. In my dad’s tribe, Ho-chunk, you’re given an honor song to welcome you in, and my mom made me my own jingle dress to dance in—it’s a colorful “healing” dress traditionally made of the bones of deer toes that clank as the dancer moves and lifts her fan to spread good health to the people around her. Now the dresses are made with rows of metal cones.

These traditions make me proud to be Native, and yet, when I was growing up, society made me feel ashamed of my heritage. At school I was one of only 10 indigenous kids in a class of hundreds. My reservation, Sandia Pueblo, was just outside Albuquerque, New Mexico, yet most of my classmates knew nothing about Native people. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve seen some oversexualized Poca-hottie costume or been asked whether I live in a tepee. (The answer is no.) One time, when I dropped my books in the hallway, kids started dancing around me, making war whooping sounds. All I wanted in that moment was to cut off my long hair. It’d be so much easier to go to school if I were white, I thought.

Thankfully, I had my dance studio, where I could dance it all out and feel better. I began to practice ballet and jazz in my teens, but I still loved how expressive indigenous dance was. Once I graduated high school, I pursued both professionally. But for years I kept being typecast as the “Native girl” or “indigenous princess,” even when auditioning for Western roles. Now, at 27, I’m tired of it, which is why I’ve reenrolled in school to study indigenous liberal studies and business. My dream is to open my own indigenous dance company and tell Native stories through contemporary and classical dance. I want to show how nuanced and resilient my people are. There’s real beauty in our culture when it’s not appropriated.

PHOTO: LeRoy Grafe

Attend a powwow, and you’ll understand. They’re huge gatherings that are filled with food, song, and dance. Everyone shows up in beautiful beadwork—our regalia (we don’t call them costumes) are like works of art. There are different outfits based on your dance, like the fancy shawl that mimics the colors and grace of a butterfly. For my eagle dance, my family made me wings out of feathers (pictured above). They represent spiritual strength and transformation. I can feel the energy of the eagle when I have them on.

Hair and makeup also play a huge role. During the dancing contests, you’re judged on your footwork and your presentation. But more than that, the beauty rituals offer a deep bonding experience. Native people think of our hair as having its own life. We don’t cut it—it’d be like cutting off a limb—so it’s a sign of trust to have someone braid yours. It’s also a misconception that every Native woman wears her hair in two braids. In certain communities, like my dad’s, we wear a ponytail with beads and a wrap around the back. In my mom’s tribe, Sandia Pueblo, we wear our hair down all the time. Our elders have the most beautiful, long silver gray hair.

I finally taught myself how to braid after years of practice for my powwow dances. You want your braids nice and tight, so they don’t unravel while you’re dancing. I use hairspray (lately I’ve been really into Pantene) and a comb to tightly pull every strand into place, then I wrap them in shoestring. My feather is the last to go on since it’s so delicate.

PHOTO: LeRoy Grafe

PHOTO: LeRoy Grafe

PHOTO: LeRoy Grafe

We don’t wear any makeup on my reservation, but I wear a lot to dance. The eagle dance is expressive and regal, so I want my makeup to reflect that. I’ll usually start with white and gold eyeshadow, which I put around my eyes and feather out, kind of like Black Swan, then down my nose to create a beak. Then I draw a slick wing using a good waterproof eyeliner (like Stila’s Stay All Day), along with a swipe of Benefit’s They’re Real Mascara. It doesn’t budge at all. I use Anastasia Beverly Hills Brow Powder Duo on my brows because it blends really well.

The last thing I put on is a really vibrant red lipstick and sometimes face paint. Women are starting to reclaim it, as a visual unifier at all the protests happening now. Whether dancing or marching for my people’s rights, it puts me into warrior mode—ready to feel the drum.

Watch Ria Thundercloud perform her eagle dance:



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