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Jessie James Decker Doesn't Care What Critics Think About Her Drinking While Breastfeeding


Singer, designer, reality TV star, and mother of three Jessie James Decker caused a stir last month when she posted an Instagram photo of herself sipping on a glass of wine while breastfeeding her youngest child. Critics flooded her comments section with statements like, “Why are you drinking while feeding your child? Disgusting.” Another person wrote, “Drinking alcohol & nursing ur baby. Real smart.”

But given the ‘gram’s DGAF caption—”Cheers bitches”—Decker may have suspected there’d be critics before she even posted the photo. Either way, she’s standing by her choice now. “I have three children. I know what I’m doing now. And it’s totally OK to toast to a celebration and have a drink while you’re breastfeeding,” she told US Weekly in a recent interview. “After three children I’ve learned about what things to worry about and what things not to worry about and a sip of wine isn’t one of them!”

Still, it’s worth noting that the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention says, per its website, “Not drinking alcohol is the safest option for breastfeeding mothers.” Although, “Generally, moderate alcohol consumption by a breastfeeding mother (up to 1 standard drink per day) is not known to be harmful to the infant, especially if the mother waits at least 2 hours after a single drink before nursing.”

“However,” the post continues, “exposure to alcohol above moderate levels through breast milk could be damaging to an infant’s development, growth, and sleep patterns. Alcohol consumption above moderate levels may also impair a mother’s judgment and ability to safely care for her child. Drinking alcoholic beverages is not an indication to stop breastfeeding; however, consuming more than one drink per day is not recommended.”

While the issue is divisive for sure, some moms did defend Decker and urged naysayers to steer clear of mommy shaming. “Got to love these mommy haters. They so ‘disgusted’ with your posts yet they still follow you and use their time and energy to comment,” one person wrote. Another encouraged Decker, writing, “From one breastfeeding mama to another, you do you!” Sounds like that’s exactly Decker’s plan.

Related: See Jessie James Decker’s Vintage Sports-Themed Nursery





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Some Critics Say the Biracial Actors in 'Crazy Rich Asians' Aren't Asian Enough—But I Call Bullshit


A few weeks ago, a friend texted me about dim sum using only Chinese characters. “Oh no, you’re fake Asian. Hold on,” he continued before he translated his order into English for me. “Fried dough, scallion pancakes with egg, and soy milk.”

“You mean you tiao, but okay,” I replied. “My family only eats it with juk.” I speak very little Cantonese—I’m talking 20 words at most—but when it comes to dim sum, I know how to order.

We’ve been friends for years, and while I can usually put up with his antagonistic brand of teasing, it’s been getting to me lately. I’m “only” half-Asian, something the world feels the need to remind me of at every turn, like when the guy at dim sum hands me a fork and I hear my dad say my name as he’s speaking Cantonese to my Nainai. But I’m also Italian, which for some reason didn’t come up when the popular girl in seventh grade called me a chink, and when everyone—at the coffee shop, in the cab—plays the “but where are you really from?” game. I might be made up of two ethnicities, but I don’t really count as either.

That’s why I’m probably more offended than most at the “controversy” surrounding some of the cast members of Crazy Rich Asians and why, conversely, their inclusion is so legitimizing to me. Henry Golding, the male lead, and supporting actress Sonoya Mizuno are both half-Asian—and thus, according to some critics, not Asian enough to star in the movie. Actress Jamie Chung referred to Golding’s casting as “bullshit” in an interview. (She later apologized.) One op-ed about Golding had the candid title, “We’d Love to See a Full Asian Lead for Once.”

PHOTO: Sanja Bucko

I understand the frustration at the constant whitewashing in Hollywood. (See: Scarlett Johanssen playing a Japanese character in Ghost in the Shell, Emma Stone starring as a woman of Hawaiian descent in Aloha, and Matt Damon somehow playing the hero in a movie literally entitled The Great Wall, as if we haven’t been defending that shit for centuries.) It’s so rampant that a producer even suggested casting a white woman for the lead to Crazy Rich Asians author Kevin Kwan—who, of course, gave it a hard no.

But to impose whitewashing narratives onto biracial people feels like erasure of half of who I am. And, for me, it’s not “whitewashing,” anyway. It’s more like “whatwashing”: What are you? What’s your background? It’s what so many mixed-race people who don’t pass as white have to contend with on a daily basis.

Since when does being more than one thing cancel the other out? According to Golding, who’s Malaysian and English, some people implied he won the role because he’s half-white, as if being biracial comes with special perks. Please. Science, for what it’s worth, backs me up here. (See how Asian I am?) A 2008 study from UC Davis found that Asian-Caucasian mixes are twice as likely to suffer from psychological disorders, like depression, anxiety, and substance abuse, than full Asians. Lauren Berger, one of the authors, surmises that a lower or conflicting ethnic identity—that is, the extent to which someone ascribes to one identity over another—may contribute to it.

It’s hard to establish any sort of ethnic identity when I keep receiving conflicting messages about what that identity is. I’m too white for my Chinese friends to consider me a “real” Asian, but still Asian enough to catch the occasional slur. And I don’t understand why other people are slicing and dicing my ethnicity in the first place, something both Golding and Mizuno have called out. “If I can’t play that [Asian] part, what can I play?” Mizuno asked in an interview earlier this month. “A part that’s half Japanese, a quarter English, and a quarter Argentinean? How many parts are there for that?”

Golding concisely summed it up in an interview with Glamour: “It was quite strange that people were saying I wasn’t Asian enough. It’s like, ‘Oh, you’re not Asian enough to play an Asian role.’ So what does that mean for people who come from mixed heritage? I grew up in Asia; I’m Malaysian. You can try to justify how Asian you are, but you’re never going to make everybody happy … When does the point come that these stereotypes are thrown to the wind? Making something the norm is the only way of not making it a talking point.”

However, I think one reason for it may be my own doing. I refer to myself as “half”: I’m half-Asian, or, if I’m feeling generous, half-Chinese and half-Italian. I’ve been saying it for as long as I can remember, mostly because it’s succinct and typically satisfies whoever’s rude enough to ask. And it’s accurate (although recent results from 23andMe suggest that there’s some Mongolian and North African mixed in there).

PHOTO: Courtesy of Deanna Pai

But maybe I should start to replace the word “half” with “both.” I am both Chinese and Italian. One doesn’t have to negate, or overpower, or defer to the other. It’s like how my comfort food is fried rice with lap ceung, but I’m also freakishly good at making dragged pastas like cavatelli. Both can be true.

In a new interview, Golding described this ownership over identity in a way that made me tear up. “There was always a struggle with being Asian and not being Asian enough. It’s going to be down to me to own my race,” he said. “Once you’re secure with yourself, it doesn’t matter who the fuck says whatever.”

It’s validating to see people like me confront similar feelings in real time. They get it! And better yet, they’re talking about it. Sure, the haters will hate. They’ll say we’re fake Asians, that we’re not Asian enough, that we’re watered down. But that won’t make it true.

Deanna Pai is a writer and editor currently based in New York.



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How Designers, Stylists, and Fashion Critics Responded to the 2018 Golden Globes Blackout


“I think people are aware, now, of a power imbalance, and it’s something that leads to abuse,” Meryl Streep, dressed in custom black Vera Wang, explained to E!’s Ryan Seacrest on the red carpet at last night’s Golden Globes. “It’s led to abuse in our own industry, and it’s led to abuse across the domestic workers’ field of work. It’s in the military, it’s in Congress, it’s everywhere. And we want to fix that. And we feel sort of emboldened in this particular moment to stand together in a thick black line dividing then from now.”

And so went last night’s red carpet: Glamorous actresses in glamorous black gowns, explaining why they were all wearing the same color to one of the most glamorous events of the year.

It’s a plot point that’s been developing since December, when rumors began circulating of an unofficial dress suggestion that was later revealed as a full-fledged “let’s all wear black” protest last week, with the announcement of the antiharassment legal defense fund Time’s Up, backed by hundreds of actresses including Eva Longoria and Kerry Washington. And public opinion on the fashion-minded protest was mixed from the outset: Some dismissed the black dress code as a lazy form of protest—after all, how many times have celebrities worn pins on the red carpet to bring attention to one cause or another, and what has it really done?—while others hailed stars for not just planning to show up to the red carpet as if everything was normal. Plus, in the age of slogan T-shirts, it’s a form of activism that’s grown to be expected.

PHOTO: Christopher Polk/NBC

As these conversations played out publicly—in the press, on social media, among celebrities themselves—there was a different commotion happening behind the scenes. With just a few weeks to go, Hollywood stylists and designers were in full-on panic mode, given that most red-carpet gowns are custom-made and planned well in advance.

Christian Siriano, who dressed a number of stars for last night’s Globes (including Christina Hendricks, America Ferrera, and Kelly Clarkson) tells Glamour of the last-minute scramble: “We did one finished piece that was in a bright fuchsia that we completed and had to change.”

Still, this type of down-to-the-wire switch isn’t something completely foreign to designers who design for the red carpet. (Lest we forget: Just last year Siriano made not one but two dresses for This Is Us‘ Chrissy Metz to choose from for the Golden Globes, and she ended up wearing neither.) “I have learned in this business that sadly things change last-minute all the time, so it didn’t bother us,” he says.

Designing gowns for the 2018 Golden Globes did prove to be a tight rope to walk for Siriano, though. The women he dressed “still want[ed] to be exciting, glamorous, but just in this solidarity way, where they’ll all making one powerful statement.”

For some of the brands represented on the red carpet, there was an understanding that the blackout protest was more involved than lending out all their black samples. Prabal Gurung, who dressed Kerry Washington and Issa Rae for the Globes, published a touching letter on his website hours before the Globes, writing: “The 2018 Golden Globe Awards has significant potential to alter the course of this historic movement. It is a moment where these admirable, strong, and brave actresses have decided to use fashion as a means of protest. We—the fashion industry—should be proud to help amplify and visually communicate such a powerful agenda.” What’s more, he, along with Calvin Klein, Sachin & Babi, and other brands who dressed celebrities for the event, also stepped up to donate money to Time’s Up’s legal fund. Because of that, this year, the celebrity and fashion brand relationship proved just how powerful it could be.

Meanwhile, in the days leading up to the Globes, top Hollywood stylists, from Micaela Erlanger to Karla Welch, posted photos of racks of black clothing, hinting at what was to come on the red carpet—all while rumors abounded that there was a shortage of black gowns, and behind-the-scenes fighting about which actresses were getting the best black dresses, according to The Hollywood Reporter. Celebrities were taking the dress code very seriously.

Welch—who dressed Elisabeth Moss, Sarah Paulson, Tracee Ellis Ross, America Ferrera, and Amy Poehler for the Golden Globes—was quick to call the night a success: “I think anything that encourages and brings women to use their very powerful platforms is big,” she tells Glamour. “Symbolism is one of the most potent forms of dissent.”

Though celebrities appeared eager to discuss their reasons for wearing black to the Golden Globes, the time-honored red-carpet interview proved to be one of the trickiest parts of the evening. One could argue it would be a tough dynamic from the get-go: The aesthetics and glitz weren’t supposed to be the centerpiece of the evening, and yet actresses had collaborated with top designers on gowns that took hours of handwork and thousands of dollars to make. On the ground, correspondents seemed to skirt the “Who are you wearing?” question altogether—and when it was brought up, it almost felt taboo.

75th Annual Golden Globe Awards - Arrivals

PHOTO: Frazer Harrison

“The red-carpet interviewers on E! and NBC struggled a bit with how to handle a red carpet turned over to a singular color and message,” Tom Fitzgerald, who publishes the blog Tom + Lorenzo with his husband, Lorenzo Marquez, tells Glamour. But according to many experts and fashion enthusiasts, simply avoiding the topic altogether is a disservice: “Those looks were put together by a bunch of people who worked hard behind the scenes,” Fitzgerald says. “It’s not wrong or frivolous to expect a red-carpet event to have a focus on fashion, and indeed, almost all of the attendees stuck to high-glamour, high-end looks from major houses, as per the usual.”

There’s a symbiotic relationship between fashion brands and actresses whereby designers lend, gift, and sometimes even pay for their creations to be worn on the red carpet, for the huge exposure it generates. It might not make it into the preshow broadcast beyond the “Who are you wearing?” question, but it’s an economy in and of itself—and one that’s highly valuable to both parties. By deeming these conversations frivolous or even contrary to the cause, you’re glossing over the work of largely women-led teams of stylists, designers, and seamstresses working to make these red-carpet looks happen. Not to mention: Fashion is a revenue stream that by in large favors female celebrities. (Not many can compete with the reported $15 million Jennifer Lawrence was reportedly paid for her endorsement deal with Dior, for instance.) Why get rid of it?

Fitzgerald’s suggestion is to find another way to incorporate fashion into the red carpet, without making actresses feel like their dresses are the only thing they will be asked to talk about. “Someone could secure that info before they step on camera and just put it up on screen while they’re talking,” he says. “‘Nicole Kidman is wearing a Dior Couture gown’ at the bottom of the screen takes nothing…away from the interview.”

NBC's "75th Annual Golden Globe Awards" - Red Carpet Arrivals

PHOTO: Christopher Polk/NBC

The red-carpet missteps didn’t end there, though, according to some. Heather Cocks, who publishes the blog Go Fug Yourself along with Jessica Morgan, wonders why men, who by in large also participated in last night’s fashion protest wearing all black and Time’s Up pins, weren’t asked about the protest on the red carpet, as if saying the fight to end Hollywood’s sexual abuse and harassment problem was just a women’s thing. “It was disappointing how few men were called on the carpet about the state of affairs and what they intend to contribute,” she explains. “Women can do it alone if we have to, because we’re awesome, but we shouldn’t have to.”

In spite all of this, what turned out to be the biggest surprise of the night for spectators was how successful of a fashion night it ultimately was: Tracee Ellis Ross wowed in a Marc Jacobs gown and turban custom made in black, Claire Foy looked utterly chic in a Stella McCartney tuxedo, and Millie Bobby Brown in a futuristic Calvin Klein minidress earned her place on best-dressed-of-all-time lists. As cliché as it is to say, women last night made black their own, and red-carpet fashion didn’t suffer for it—if anything, it made it one of the most interesting red carpets in years.

As for what the fashion-minded protest from last night’s awards will end up meaning, it’s not exactly clear. And maybe that’s besides the point. Time’s Up has already raised almost $16 million and counting. And it’s hard to ignore that last night’s blackout got a conversation going.

“Within the constraints of a televised awards show that actors are attending, I think it was quite substantial,” Welch said. “Society has told us to instinctually say, ‘Oh, that’s not good enough’ before we actually digest it.”

Related Stories:

Actresses Explain What Wearing Black to the 2018 Golden Globes Means to Them

Golden Globes 2018 Red Carpet Fashion: See All the Looks

This Time’s Up Pin Is the Accessory Everyone Will Be Wearing at the Golden Globes





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Jennifer Lawrence Has a Simple Message for Mother!'s Critics


PHOTO: Robin Marchant/The Academy of Motion Picture Arts & Sciences/Getty Images

Jennifer Lawrence‘s new movie, Mother!, isn’t getting the love she probably thinks it deserves. The film received an F from CinemaScore], and reviews are split — though the negative ones are pretty scathing. But negative buzz won’t stop J.Law from being J.Law, as evidenced by her reaction to the audience at an Academy screening of the movie earlier this week.

So, basically, the actress held up her middle finger while recounting a tale from filming during a Q&A portion of the screening at the Museum of Modern Art on Thursday, according to People, as if to say, “I don’t care what you think,” or “You’re totally missing the point,” or maybe, “It doesn’t matter what you say about the movie, I’m Jennifer Lawrence, I’ve got my Oscar, I’ve got my money, and no amount of green tomato splats can change that.” Meanwhile, Darren Aronofsky, the film’s director and Lawrence’s boyfriend, simply giggled from the seat beside her. That pretty much says it all, if you ask us.

The film features Lawrence’s titular Mother character dealing with unexpected house guests, a husband who seems more than a little creepy, and other truly terrifying surprises that delve into spoiler territory (but are every bit as disturbing as the ones found in Certified Fresh It).

Lawrence has confessed she isn’t totally on board with how reluctant Aronofsky was about revealing any details of the film to prospective audience members before they showed up at the theaters. “He wants people to go in blind,” she said, according to a New York Times profile. “You’re going to miss all of the detail and all of the brilliance behind the whole movie. My advice is to understand the allegory.”

Maybe later audiences, more likely to pick up spoilers as time goes by, will have a more favorable opinion of the film. Or maybe Lawrence will continue to feel the need to flip audiences off.



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