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Why Kathryn Dennis Should Be the Next 'Bachelorette'


The last time I watched The Bachelorette in full, the inaugural Trista Rehn was agonizing over whether she should marry a fire-fighting beefcake named Ryan Sutter or slick financial analyst Charlie Maher, both of whom she’d known for a couple of weeks. The year was 2003, and—spoiler alert—she picked Ryan. The couple is still married, slogging along in domestic bliss, living in Vail with two kids and a shared interest in home renovations—an endorsement for the franchise no amount of money could buy. Yet, apart from keeping up with headlines and peripheral theatrics, I’ve never watched the show again. But, as of Friday, there’s a good chance Bachelor Nation might get me back.

According to Page Six, Kathryn Dennis—the mercurial, misunderstood female anchor of Bravo’s Southern Charm—told a fan on Twitter that she’s “actually kind of in talks” to join The Bachelorette. I understand that “kind of in talks’ is pretty much the same as saying “I sent ABC an email asking if I could be on the show,” but I do think the pairing would be wise.

For compulsive reality consumers like myself, cross-pollinating franchises can lose its appeal fast, especially when fusing it’s cable and network (see: MTV’s reigning villains Heidi and Spencer morphing into deluded sadsacks on NBC’s “I’m a Celebrity Get Me Out of Here”), but there’s something about Kathryn that feels like she could raise the stakes for ABC, a network that’s tried hard to break out of their rotation of female Bachelorette same-bots but never really managed to actually do it.

Move over JoJo and Becca, it’s time for a woman with some lightly-packed baggage!

Dennis first appeared on Southern Charm—a reality series I liken to a big gulp of bourbon-spiked sweet tea—at 21 years old and has been steadily portrayed as a wild-child; a hysterical, “crazy” gold digger. It wasn’t until the current season that she started getting some respect, likely because the father of her two children and fellow cast member, 55-year-old former politician Thomas Ravenel, was accused by two women of sexual assault.

PHOTO: Paul Cheney/Bravo/NBCU Photo Bank via Getty Images

Despite recent listicles explaining how far she’s come over the years, I don’t think Kathryn was ever “crazy”—she was made to look that way by manipulative men and judgemental women. Many of these men and women have come around and admitted they treated her unfairly. All this is to say, I’d welcome her skeptical, wizened demeanor on a show like “The Bachelorette.” This girl knows her way around a camera but also has some real-life experience, which could make for exciting television.

Plus, Kathryn appears to have a very tangible, very mysterious allure to men—during the first season alone, Southern Charm stars Shep Rose, Craig Conover, Whitney Sudler-Smith, and Ravenel all clearly were taken with her. I know the harem of guys on The Bachelorette always parrot that they’re infatuated with the lady of the season, but I’m sorry—I just don’t always buy it. It’d be interesting to see how a mixed-demographic of dudes take to the no-bullshit Dennis—who doesn’t fit the bubbly, cheerleader, stand-by-your-man mold other women cast on the show embody.

Southern Charm - Season 5

PHOTO: Paul Cheney/Bravo/NBCU Photo Bank via Getty Images

Another point of interest: After a stint in a Malibu rehab in 2016, Kathryn reportedly undergoes random drug tests as part of her child custody arrangement with Ravenel. This means we’d get a dry Bachelorette, a point of differentiation for a franchise that banks on its contestants being egged on by an open bar.

Whatever happens, here’s hoping her one-on-ones will be less awkward than her job interview at Gwynne’s.





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Watch Mila Kunis, Kristen Bell, and Kathryn Hahn Hilariously Review Kids Toys


When you throw Mila Kunis, Kristen Bell, and Kathryn Hahn in a room together and ask them to discuss what it’s like to be a kid, you’re going to get an ab workout just from laughing so hard. These are, after all, the same women who made grocery shopping funny in Bad Moms.

So in order to get into the holiday spirit early, we gathered a selection of the finest children’s toys for these A Bad Moms Christmas stars to review.Right off the bat, the women were not fans of Sweet Tears Baby (as you can tell by their faces in the photo above). Bell even went so far as to call the doll a murderer. Note to self: Avoid that doll at all costs. Holiday Barbie, meanwhile, went over a little better with the crew. Still, they thought she would look better with a hamburger. But, then again, so would everyone. The Furreal Roarin’ Tiger was the clear winner among the group. The women all thought their kids would love it, and Kunis, a grown woman, couldn’t stop petting it.

Watch, below:

A Bad Moms Christmas, the sequel to last summer’s hit Bad Moms, comes out November 1 and pays tribute to all of the hard-working moms who try to make the holidays magical for their families. “Christmas is a magical time, full of wonderful and exciting joy. A time for making lasting memories with family and friends,” Kunis narrates in the movie’s trailer. “But do you know the secret behind what makes Christmas so special? Moms. Moms working their asses off cooking, wrapping, decorating, and shopping.” We co-sign that.

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Read Kathryn Hahn's Letter to Her Sexual Self


On I Love Dick, the boundary-pushing Amazon series, Kathryn Hahn plays Chris Kraus, a filmmaker consumed by her lust for a cowboy named Dick (Kevin Bacon). To indulge her desire, Chris writes a series of explicit letters, each of which begins the same way: “Dear Dick.” Hahn, 44, has made her career playing supporting characters (Bad Moms, How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days), but as Chris, she is a one-woman sexual revolution. Here the Emmy-nominated actress (who also starred in Transparent) pens a love letter to herself.

Dear Kathryn,

One day you will become an adult. A sexual adult. A fearless performer. And an unabashed lover of your own body. But it won’t happen overnight.

You will grow up the only daughter in a family of beautiful and dysfunctional boys. You will attend an all-girls Catholic school and wear a little bride’s dress to marry Jesus at your First Communion. You will find your husband, Jesus, to be very attractive. In the third grade, when you and your friends are walking home from school, a grown man will flash you. You’ll all laugh as it’s happening, but then burst into hysterical tears. When you go to your friend’s house and play “marriage,” you’ll always play the husband. That way you get to be the one with the dick.

At 13 you will draw a picture of yourself in pencil in your diary. (You will keep a diary because you will have a need to put your thoughts down, to express your innermost everything.) You will point out all the physical negatives: your pointy boobs, zits, huge nose, stringy hair. So much of your shame will come from your physical self—and your relationships with other girls. You will have friends who betray you at every turn, and that betrayal will feel so real and deep and physical. When you get your period, one friend will be so jealous that she will convince you (and a bunch of other people) that you got it only because you fell on the bar of a boy’s bike.

In high school you will learn how to compartmentalize your sexuality, how to put a lid on it. Though you won’t actually touch anyone else until the summer after senior year, you’ll be a chronic masturbator. It will be a deep, weird secret that is also awesome and private and yours.

The first time you will feel sexy will be in college. You will wear a black leotard, a tartan kilt, Doc Martens boots, and a headband, and people will start looking at you differently. And you will admit to yourself: This doesn’t feel bad. Still, you will spend so much time feeling messy. You will spend so much time comparing yourself with others and trying to be articulate, knowing that you’re smarter than the words coming out of your mouth, that you are smarter than the guy you’re obsessed with. Before you meet your husband, you will be with someone incredibly powerful. He will be an asshole, and you won’t share the same politics. You will think to yourself, God, I can’t stand him. You will want his attention and validation—badly. You will think to yourself, I wish I could wear that f-cker’s power.

You will become an actor. In your work you will be much braver than you are in your day-to-day life. The mind-body connection will become clearer to you, and you will use it to get into the guts of each character. You will share scenes with people who are un­­inhibited. You will find joy in knowing that the people behind the camera are looking at you with such empathy and such faith. You will learn to love that feeling of jumping off a cliff into your bravest self. You will use your personal experiences to bring heat to your performances. And you will hunger for that outlet.

You will grow to be so grateful for—and so in love with—your body. Having children will help with that, because it will show you what you are capable of. You will thank your belly for growing them and your breasts for feeding them. You will want to find the girl who drew that picture in her diary and hug her so tightly. You will look back and be so mad you said yes to that bleach job for that gig, so glad you never got a nose job.

At 44, you will realize something astounding: Life just gets sexier and sexier. Your sexual self will become this enormous, loud thing that you no longer take for granted, no ­longer deny. You will refuse to put a lid on it. You will listen to it. My God, you will hear it roar.

Love,
Kathryn

Kathryn Hahn stars in I Love Dick and A Bad Moms Christmas, out in November.



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