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How Turning 30 Has Made Me Rethink Lingerie Shopping


I’ll never forget getting measured for my quinceañera dress and being horrified that my hips were double the size of my chest. I felt uneven, incomplete. Here I was—literally preparing to be presented to God as having officially entered womanhood—feeling the complete opposite of womanly.

Those feelings stuck with me well beyond my 15th birthday. And they’re largely why I’ve always struggled to view myself as sexy, especially when it comes to shopping for lingerie. That’s partly because I grew up surrounded by hypersultry, hyperstylized underwear ads broadcast everywhere from mall store windows to primetime television. I needed bras and underwear, but I was intimidated by the prospect of walking into a store and buying them—hell, I was repelled by it. Gisele Bündchen was sexy. Tyra Banks was sexy. Me? I was a work in progress.

Something is changing for me, though: I’m turning 30 in a few months, and I’ve started to feel like I’m running out of excuses to be flippant about what I wear underneath my clothes. I’m supposed to be “thirty, flirty, and thriving,” so shouldn’t my bras make me feel grown-up? It’s a doubly significant milestone for me, because it marks 15 years since my quince. (Some Latinas celebrate a doble quince when they turn 30.) Considering how the singular experience of getting measured for my dress led to so much insecurity about my body later on, it seems fitting that I begin to take that power back now. And that begins with my underwear drawer.

The process was easier than you might expect, in part because the ads and marketing we see for lingerie are changing: Indie brands like Lonely Label and TomboyX, as well as buzzy names like Aerie and Savage X, release campaigns that feel personable and welcoming, with different types of bodies and faces. They’ve inspired me to think about this type of fashion in a new way.

Models at Savage x Fenty’s show during New York Fashion Week

Presley Ann

BROOKLYN NY  SEPTEMBER 12  Model walks at the Savage x Fenty  September 2018  New York Fashion Week at Brooklyn Navy...
Presley Ann

“The turn away from supermodels to more relatable, everyday models for intimate apparel has been significant,” says Cora Harrington, founder of the blog The Lingerie Addict and author of In Intimate Detail: How to Choose, Wear, and Love Lingerie. “When I first started The Lingerie Addict over 10 years ago, this conversation was just starting in the lingerie blogger community, and now it’s a part of our everyday dialogue when we’re discussing lingerie brands.”

Her advice to me on how to build my lingerie collection? “Only buy things you love and want to wear,” she says. “It’s easy to go a little overboard, especially when you’re first becoming interested in lingerie—I know I did. It’s equally easy, especially if you’re a hard-to-find size or if you’re not used to having options, to feel like you have to just buy everything. But you don’t want a drawer full of things you never wear or—God forbid—that you hate.”

Up to this point, my underwear drawer has been filled with rather blah bras I’ve picked up in bargain bins over the years. My focus this time was on finding everyday bras that were comfortable first and foremost, but that also felt feminine and sexy.

Harrington recommends starting with a little bit of research, if only to have a realistic understanding of what you need and what you’ll find. “Most of us aren’t really taught or exposed to much in the way of lingerie education,” she says. “A lot of people don’t understand that bra construction must change as the breast size changes.” For example, an F or K cup can’t be built the same way as a B or D cup is. “It’s not that manufacturers want you to have ‘ugly’ bras—it’s that a flimsy wire, thin straps, or too-delicate lace is simply not supportive enough.”



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Margot Robbie's Tonya Harding Will Make You Rethink Everything You Thought You Knew


The imagery is iconic: Nancy Kerrigan’s virginal white lace dress versus Tonya Harding’s vampy maroon get-up. So are the sounds: Kerrigan’s wails of “Why?” as she clutches her knee, versus Tonya’s sobs to the Olympic judges while clutching her broken lace skate. The year was 1994, and these two were vying to be America’s figure skating sweetheart. One was an assailant, the other a victim. The stage was set, the character tropes determined.

Twenty-three years ago, popular imagination had room enough for only one kind of ice queen: the good girl, the one with the lithe body and shiny hair, who followed the rules. Tonya Harding—with her homespun costumes, moussed-up bangs, and routines set to bass-heavy soundtracks—cut a starkly different figure. After the legendary dust-up at the 1994 Lillehammer Olympics, Nancy went on to host Saturday Night Live and wave (grudgingly) from the Disney Parade. Tonya receded from the spotlight as little more than a punchline.

PHOTO: Mike Powell

Director Craig Gillespie’s new film I, Tonya resurrects Harding, but in 2017 she’s given the homecoming she never could have received in 1994. Instead, the movie celebrates Harding, played viciously by Margot Robbie in all her white-trash glory: her heavy metal skate routines, her foul mouth, her rural poverty. She decries a system rigged against her. After receiving low scores at one competition, despite out-skating her more demure challengers, she glides up to the judge’s box and asks, “How do I get a fair shot?” “We also judge on presentation,” the evaluator retorts, gazing down his nose at the 5’1” scrapper before him.

It’s a moment that’s unequivocally sympathetic to Harding—who we’ve just seen slaving with needle and thread over the outfit the judges are scorning—but it wouldn’t always have had that effect. Her image is cast in the light of today’s progressive feminism. In a flat Oregon accent with frizzy blonde hair, Robbie as Tonya tells the camera: “Most people’s reaction to me is that I’m a real person, in a sport where the judges want you to be an old-timey version of what a woman is supposed to be.”

The sympathetic portrayal of Tonya Harding shows us how far feminism has come in just over two decades. What makes this Tonya different is that we get the whole of her—especially parts that were edited out in the 1994 media coverage. For the first time, we get a clear picture of her lifelong victimization: first at the hands of her maniacal stage mother, played by Allison Janney—whose hilariously diabolical portrayal is worth the price of admission—and later at the fists of her abusive husband Jeff Gillooly. Margot Robbie serves an Oscar-worthy performance, reveling in Harding’s contradictions: her raw talent and self-sabotage, the unfair aspersions cast upon her, and her unwillingness to admit responsibility.

She was ahead of her time; today, pop culture has anointed realness and authenticity as queen. Squeaky-clean Taylor Swift is on the wane, while the regular degular schmegular girl from the Bronx, Cardi B, reigns supreme. Lifestyle doyennes like Gwyneth Paltrow and her pristine white jeans (genes?) seem retro compared to down-to-earth and self-deprecating Chrissy Teigen. The Kardashians handily shoved the Hiltons off their pedestal, swapping the pedigree of a hotel empire for the fame of a sex tape. The bulk of Keeping Up With the Kardashians depicts them standing around kitchen islands and lounging under blankets. Somehow, our heroines shape-shifted from the unattainable perfection to aspirational normality.

PHOTO: NEON

We are now far more sensitive to the influence of powerful men over women. When women come forward, as they have been in droves across all industries decrying sexual harassment, or as victims of sexual violence, the culture is much more willing to hear out these accusers. We are even more willing to consider the person’s context. We now have a word for people who question a woman’s background and use it against her: slut shaming. But in the ’90s it was considered perfectly acceptable.

In 1991, the same year Harding skated her history-making triple axel, Anita Hill was delivering testimony to Congress about how Clarence Thomas routinely sexually harassed her at work from 1981 to1983. Instead of hearing out the routine abuse and humiliation she endured, she had her character and personal life assassinated, with Missouri Senator John Danforth suggesting she might suffer from “erotomania,” the delusion that a powerful superior is in love with her. Many asked why she waited nine years to bring these allegations to light, a classic move to undermine women as played out in the case of Cosby’s victims. Conservative pundit David Brock painted her, in his words, as “a little bit nutty and a little bit slutty.”

This knee-jerk designation stuck throughout the ‘90s. Monica Lewinsky, a 22-year-old intern, was excoriated not only by conservatives licking their chops to send Bill Clinton down, but by feminists on the left as well. Gloria Steinem wrote a defense of Clinton in a 1998 NYT op-ed, arguing: “The power imbalance between them increased the index of suspicion, but there is no evidence to suggest that Ms. Lewinsky’s will was violated, quite the contrary.” In the wake of the Shitty Media Men list and more nuanced understandings of the dynamics of power, coercion, and consent, this sentence reads like it hails from the Stone Age. In 1999, New York Times columnist Maureen Dowd characterized Lewinsky as a “sexual climber” who “…connived to trade beauty and sex for affluence and status.” That a self-described feminist lobbed this assertion makes the 2017 head explode. Katie Roiphe recognized the irony in 1998, saying, “What’s interesting is that women overwhelmingly, even more than men…still strongly support Clinton. Even mainstream feminists, who you’d think would come out and say, ‘You know, here’s this poor young woman being exploited, let’s take her side,’ they’re not taking her side.”

Though Harding’s black mark was for violence and class animosity rather than sexual victimization, the ‘90s media still relished in the schadenfreude of her fall from whatever grace she momentarily held. But I, Tonya is fully steeped in today’s ethos. The film excavates facts of Harding’s biography that, if not unknown, were underreported at the time. Her mother abused her throughout her childhood, even beating her with a hairbrush before a competition. “She skates better when she’s mad,” she declares. Later, she even pays off a heckler to lob insults like, “Where’d you park your double wide?” as Harding toddles out onto the ice. Harding dropped out of high school at 15 years old to pursue skating—the same age she had her leering stepbrother, who she called “Creepy Chris,” arrested for attempting to molest her. This happened to be the same day she met Jeff Gillooly, the man who would ultimately destroy her career. Following the pattern of abuse she grew up with, Gillooly, too, beat her horribly. In a moment of black-as-night comedy, Robbie deadpans: “Nancy gets hit one time and the world shits. I got hit all the time!”

In one poignant and revealing scene, Gillooly gets pulled over for speeding. The reason for his haste is that he’s ferrying his bride to the hospital, after he shot her in the eye. The cop sees her in distress, yet does nothing. “And that’s why I don’t trust the authorities,” she tells us. One can see why.

Even the knee-capping scheme in light of today’s news doesn’t seem all that crazy. If in 1994 an emissary from the future could have swooped down and told us that in 2016 the Russians would hack our election and a quasi-illiterate, hate-mongering reality star would be president, a casual kneecapping sabotage doesn’t seem that far out.

Harding claims to have no knowledge of the planned attack, which was carried out by her bodyguard Sean Eckhardt and her then-husband Gillooly. Today, had the reality of the domestic violence she endured been public record, a far more sympathetic embrace of Harding would be expected. Instead, Harding became a laughingstock and was robbed of her passion. When the judge barred Harding from figure skating after she plead guilty to hindering the prosecution, she told him she’d rather do jail time. Skating was all she’d ever known—and loved. She was denied. So she used her body as her profit again, becoming a professional boxer. She now works as a landscaper and is “a good mom” (her words) to a 12-year-old son. This week, she even joined Margot Robbie on the red carpet for I, Tonya‘s premiere. She’s living the American dream—after we snatched it from her.

NEON and 30WEST Present the Los Angeles Premiere of "I, Tonya" Supported By Svedka

PHOTO: Vivien Killilea



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Gigi Hadid's Genius Makeup Trick Will Make You Rethink How You Line Your Lips


The Internet has been going wild for Gigi Hadid’s brand-new Maybelline collaboration. Earlier this month the model and fashion designer confirmed that she’s been working on a collection with the drugstore brand for the past year—and we finally got a look last week. First, we got a peek at her Jetsetter palette, which is perfect for anyone who travels even a fraction of the amount Gigi does. It landed at Ulta on Wednesday and we can confirm: it looks amazing. (It even sold out within hours of launching in the U.K.) Now the entire collection, which will be available October 22 at Ulta, has been revealed, and Gigi is sharing insider tips via Instagram mini-tutorials on how she’s using her products.

Maybelline posted photos of Gigi’s entire East Coast Glam look, which is nude with pink tones and a graphic black cat eye. But we got a behind-the-scenes look at it, too: in a video posted early Saturday morning by the brand, Gigi introduces us to her ultimate nude lipstick—and the genius trick she uses to get the perfect application.

“If you know me, you know I always have to have a nude lip on me my whole life,” she says in the video. “So when I made the Gigi collection for Maybelline, I knew I had to do the perfect nude Gigi lip.” The color she chose to create it is called Taura, after her zodiac sign (Taurus), and it’s warm with just a hint of a rosy undertone.

Gigi starts off with a little concealer on her lips, because they’re naturally very pigmented (#gigiproblems)—and that’s when she shares her brilliant lipstick hack.

“Some people do it, I think, opposite, but I do lipstick first, then lip liner—just because I think it’s easier for me to line my lips, and I don’t do anything wonky and weird,” she explains.

So she applies the lipstick all over, and then defines the edges with a little liner. It makes so much sense, right?

For anyone who has ever struggled with getting lip liner right (we can’t all be expert over-liners like Kylie Jenner), putting lipstick on first and then sealing it in with liner makes a ton of sense. The concealer on her lips acts as a primer, then the lipstick goes on top, and the drier formula of the liner sets the color.

Here’s a closer look at the lipstick—the shade she used is on the left:

Each one has a matching liner:

Finally, behold Gigi’s final look:

If the end result looks this good, there’s definitely something to her genius hack. We’ll be refreshing our Insta-feeds for more tips from this gorgeous Maybelline collab.

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