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Hailey Baldwin and Justin Bieber Waited Until They Were Married to Move in Together


Hailey Baldwin and Justin Bieber had a surprisingly traditional courtship before getting married. In February 2019, the couple revealed to Vogue that they waited until marriage to have sex.. And now, in the March 2020 issue of ELLE, Hailey (who legally changed her last name to Bieber) spills another tidbit: that she and her husband waited until they were married to move in together.

The Biebers don’t have a hard and fast rule about this, though. It’s just something they wanted to do personally. “Neither of us believed in doing that, but to each their own. If you live with a boyfriend or a fiancé or whatever it is, that’s cool,” Hailey tells the publication.

They do, however, have a few strict rules when it comes to their marriage. For one, no phones in bed. “I try to read more than be on my phone in bed. We have a rule: No phones in bed unless it’s absolutely necessary,” Hailey tells ELLE.

Hailey actually reveals several nuggets about her marriage to Justin in this new story. She says faith is one of the most important elements of their day-to-day lives. “Being able to share that with each other—to have that bond of faith and spirituality—is so [critical] for us,” she says. “It’s the most important part of our relationship, following Jesus together, being a part of the church community together. It’s everything.”

Justin went in to more detail last February about why he and Hailey didn’t have sex until marriage. “[God] doesn’t ask us not to have sex for him because he wants rules and stuff,” he told Vogue. “He’s like, ‘I’m trying to protect you from hurt and pain.’ I think sex can cause a lot of pain. Sometimes people have sex because they don’t feel good enough. Because they lack self-worth. Women do that, and guys do that. I wanted to rededicate myself to God in that way because I really felt it was better for the condition of my soul. And I believe that God blessed me with Hailey as a result. There are perks. You get rewarded for good behavior.”

Read more of Hailey Baldwin’s interview with ELLE here.



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Daphne Zuniga: Why I Waited Until I Was in My 50s to Get Married


When I turned 40, I felt confident and physically and emotionally strong. Insecurities from my 20s and 30s disappeared. And I still wasn’t looking to get hitched at all, but the funny thing is, I observed that having that attitude made me more attractive to men. I kind of felt like a guy for the first time, having fun but not wanting to commit to anyone.

Guys asked me, “Do you want to have a family? Do you want to have kids?” And my answer was always, “Well, when? When is that going to fit into my schedule if I’m auditioning, or if I’m filming?” And if that’s what you want, that’s fantastic. But I didn’t. This one life is not cookie-cutter for anybody.

I never wanted kids. But I also love children. I love their energy, and I’m pretty sure they love me. But I knew that I didn’t want them. Growing up with a single mother who worked a lot, I knew that if I were to have children, I would have to shift things about myself. And I wasn’t ready to do that.

Of course, people like to challenge you when you go against the so-called norm. When they did, I’d say, “I’ll get back to you when I get back from this job I’m about to go do.” Also, know that you don’t have to come up with some excuse or wall of protection like it’s part of the master plan. A lot of people unknowingly project their own insecurities onto you because they have nothing better to talk about. In fact, a man once said to me that having a child is the most important thing for a woman. I thought I was being punked. I was like, “Don’t project your non-ovary brain onto me!” At the end of the day, it’s between you and the universe, or you and God, or you and whoever. Trust where you are, and what you know is right for you.

I was 44 when I met my now husband, David. I was living in L.A. and he was based outside New York. And never in a million years did I think I’d meet someone who had a high-schooler at home. But even though I didn’t want kids of my own, I love his kids. They are like my bonus children, and we have the best time together.

David and I emailed and talked on the phone for three weeks until we finally met. And even after we did meet, we were still long-distance for three years. What really got me was when David one day said the opposite of what I was afraid of. As things got more serious, I said, “If you think I’m going to move to Connecticut and become a housewife in the suburbs, you got another think coming. You’re not going to clip my wings!” He looked at me, put his car keys on the kitchen counter and said, “I’m not clipping anyone’s wings. Just let me know what train station you’ll leave my car at.” I never thought someone could be so supportive until I met David.

He makes me feel like everything’s an accomplishment. When we met, 12 years ago, I told him about an audition I had and he said, “Congratulations, Daphne!” I was like, “Uh, you know that means I didn’t necessarily get the job?” And he said, “Yeah, but not everyone gets auditions, so congratulations!” That made me feel a positive as opposed to a negative. He’s never tried to change me. He’ll often say, “I love that you’re investing in yourself because you’re so good at directing.” It’s things like that that remind me of what a supportive relationship is.



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'Shrill' Review: I Waited Decades to See a Stylish Fat Woman on TV—and Now I Have It


Unfortunately, most of the things Bryant wore on Shrill were custom, because costume designer Amanda Needham couldn’t find as many tailored, smart, well-made pieces that would fit Annie’s style (and body) as she needed. “I wanted to normalize a woman of that size being fashionable. You never really see super stylish, put-together girls in that size on camera,” says Needham. “I just could not believe that we hadn’t seen anything like this before and that there wasn’t anything off-the-rack that represented these characters that we wanted to see. Why can’t people over a size 8 or even 14 feel confident in their body and have options to wear?”

Annie and her best friend Fran on Shrill.

Allyson Riggs/Hulu

And talk about options. For a night out, Annie puts on a sequin party dress. It’s everything I always was told—or told myself—I “couldn’t” wear: short, sparkly, form-fitting, and bold. Needham custom-made this dress to put a “middle finger to all of that,” she says, and show that plus-size women can wear whatever the hell they want.

“You don’t have to wear a caftan. You don’t have to disappear. Who is in charge of body confidence? Why can’t we each be in control of that for ourselves? So we went shorter. We went higher with the heel. We went loud. We went sparkly because she deserves that,” Needham explains.

Aidy Bryant wears a sparkly mini dress as Annie on 'Shrill'

Annie’s sequin dress was a highlight of her wardrobe on ‘Shrill’. It’s everything I was told I “couldn’t” wear.

Allyson Riggs/Hulu

If that dress was the opening act, the headliner was the pool party, which flashes back and forth between Annie as a kid and her life now as an adult. It’s by far the most body-positive, thrilling moment of the series. It’s also the moment that made me cry the most. I can’t count the number of times that I’ve been in a bathing suit around other people, worried about what they’ll say or think about me. Wearing a button-down and jeans, it seemed like she wasn’t going to embrace her body. But by the end, she found herself letting go and dancing to Ariana Grande amongst beautiful, proudly jiggling bodies of other plus-size women. And Needham says Annie revealing her bathing suit underneath was representative of a “real emotional breakthrough.”

Annie dances with other women at the Fat Babe Pool Party.

Annie dances at the Fat Babe Pool Party in a button-up and jeans.

Allyson Riggs/Hulu

The scene, says my friend Leah, “is a reminder that you’re your own harshest critic—I didn’t feel like I was picking apart all those women’s bodies, so why do I feel the need to do that to myself?”

Another friend, Maggie, agreed, recognizing this moment from her own life: “It’s when you decide that you’re going to stop hating yourself and you don’t care what other people think. It’s so powerful when that finally clicks in your brain and it was moving to see it play out on screen. I kept thinking about how much this show would’ve affected me if I had seen it when I was a teenager. I’m sorry that she never got to see anything like it.”

Aidy Bryant's Annie and friends wear swimsuits at a pool party on 'Shrill'

Later, Annie reveals her swimsuit underneath.

Hulu

Behind-the-scenes, filming the pool party was an emotional experience, too, according to Needham. “Going in, a lot of women probably assumed there would be nothing for them to wear. But we went all-out to present a world of options and cater to every single woman,” she says. “By the end, everyone was crying. We had this moment of just being human and being seen together in a way that was just nice. Everybody just accepted each other and everybody felt so beautiful and it just really came through on camera.” I’d argue that the clothes—having options, and plenty of stylish ones—were a big part of that.

I may still be learning to love myself and only scratching the surface of dressing for myself, not for the prying eyes of others. (Next up, the Savage x Fenty bra that Annie absolutely slays in.) I hope that there’s more Shrill to help me through the hard times of self-doubt and to remind insecure teenagers like I once was that they’re worth more than the number on the scale. I’d love to get to the point where I can say, like Annie, “I’m the one with the fat ass and big titties, so I get to decide what we do” if a man treats me wrong. But for now, I’m starting with taking some more stylistic risks, inspired by Shrill. And if fashion companies start to deliver more fashion size-20 bodies like mine can actually buy, it might just spark a revolution.

Alyse Whitney is a proudly plus-size, Korean-American woman who is the senior food editor at Rachael Ray Every Day and a longtime contributor at Glamour. Follow her: @alysewhitney.



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Justin Bieber and Hailey Baldwin Waited Until Marriage to Have Sex


Justin Bieber and Hailey Baldwin’s whirlwind romance was one of the most buzzed-about celebrity stories in 2018. The couple became engaged in July after just a few weeks of dating, and by September they officially tied the knot at a New York courthouse. (A formal ceremony is still TBD.) Bieber and Baldwin open up about their relationship in Vogue’s March cover story and reveal a new tidbit of information, as well: They waited until marriage to have sex.

According to Vogue, Bieber was more than a year into “a self-imposed tenure of celibacy” when he and Baldwin started dating. His reasoning? He had a “legitimate problem with sex” and decided to forgo it to strengthen his relationship with God.

“[God] doesn’t ask us not to have sex for him because he wants rules and stuff,” Bieber tells Vogue. “He’s like, ‘I’m trying to protect you from hurt and pain.’ I think sex can cause a lot of pain. Sometimes people have sex because they don’t feel good enough. Because they lack self-worth. Women do that, and guys do that. I wanted to rededicate myself to God in that way because I really felt it was better for the condition of my soul. And I believe that God blessed me with Hailey as a result. There are perks. You get rewarded for good behavior.”

A desire to have sex is partially what prompted Bieber and Baldwin to quickly marry at the courthouse last fall—but they had other reasons, too. “When I saw her last June, I just forgot how much I loved her and how much I missed her and how much of a positive impact she made on my life,” Bieber says. “I was like, ‘Holy cow, this is what I’ve been looking for.’”

This confession effectively debunks any speculation Justin Bieber and Hailey Baldwin married because she was pregnant. In fact, it’s clear from this interview they both thought carefully before saying “I do.” “I prayed to feel peace about the decision, and that’s where I landed,” Baldwin tells Vogue. “I love him very much. I have loved him for a long time.” Read more of their candid interview over at Vogue.com.



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Read This Before Asking Why Christine Blasey Ford Waited to Tell Her Brett Kavanaugh Story


On Monday, the #MeToo movement will get its highest wattage moment yet when psychology professor Christine Blasey Ford and Supreme Court nominee Brett Kavanaugh testify in front of Congress about one night in Maryland over 36 years ago.

Ford’s lawyer calls what happened an “attempted rape,” involving Kavanaugh shutting her in a bedroom, pinning her down while pawing at her bathing suit, and clapping a hand over her mouth when she screamed; Kavanaugh says he “categorically and unequivocally” never did anything of this sort to Ford or anyone else.

Monday’s hearing is being touted by lawmakers as a chance to find out the truth. But it’s also going to be, in many ways, a public trial for the woman who accused Kavanaugh. With rape culture and victim shaming working overtime, as it so often does in our society, a familiar question will be on the table: Why did she wait so long to come forward?

Conservatives are already teeing up the argument that jumping on a girl and pawing at her is the type of every day occurrence that shouldn’t make headlines. “Sorry, but having a drunk 17 year old BOY grope you at a teenage party is not newsworthy!” one Twitter user posted this week. And by the standards of 1982, when the alleged incident occurred, they’re right. That adds context when considering Ford’s decision to keep the experience to herself. Back then, the phrase “date rape” was newly minted in the lexicon and not widely used. Boys did whatever they wanted to girls. And girls mostly accepted this as the natural order of the species. “Boys will be boys,” explained a lawyer for three high school football players in Glen Ridge, N.J. who sexually assaulted a mentally disabled 17-year-old girl with a baseball bat and a broom handle in 1993.

Back then, as I chronicled in my book Blurred Lines: Rethinking Sex, Power, and Consent on Campus, Americans didn’t consider anything that wasn’t a violent assault by a stranger to be rape. Even intellectuals in the 1980s and 1990s didn’t take sexual assault all that seriously—they treated it more as a philosophical koan of sex relations than an important social issue. In David Mamet’s Oleanna, a play about a feminist college student who accuses her professor of rape, he calls her “frightened, repressed, confused . . . abandoned young thing of some doubtful sexuality who wants power and revenge.” Controversial academic Camille Paglia, extremely popular in those decades, argued that masculine sexual aggression was normal, and a woman’s only choice was to protect herself; to say otherwise, she declared later, was to join a brigade of “fanatical sex phobes.”

In our era of #MeToo reckoning, these voices have become quieter and things have finally started to change. But things haven’t changed enough for one woman’s word to be believed simply on its own without corroborating evidence. Or without the argument that her experience has timed-out—that statue of limitations exist when it comes to trauma.

If history is any indication (or Justice Clarence Thomas’ defense when accused of sexual harassment during his Supreme Court confirmation hearings in 1991) Kavanaugh is going to use the usual playbook to defend himself: calling himself a standup fellow—or, as Kellyanne Conway said, “a man of character and integrity”—and explaining he’s shocked, simply shocked, by this character assassination. He’ll talk about being raised right by his parents and point out that he’s a “carpool dad” for his two daughters, hoping that their mere existence will act as a shield against accusations against a member of their sex. But most importantly, he’ll talk about whether Ford told anyone at the time what happened that night.

No one who understands the nature of trauma and sexual assault thinks that it’s a big deal when women don’t tell an authority for months or years about an assault. Not every woman wants to upend her life in the pursuit of justice, or even deal with criticism about “playing the victim” from their peers or institutions. Couple that with an era where women, if something bad happened with a guy, would likely keep it to themselves due to the blasé attitude surrounding sexual violence and the permission boys and men had to engage in it. A cool Gen-X girl brushed off anything untoward, knowing there was no percentage in calling a boy out because even if a few of her friends believed her, the rest of the school would not. And how could they? In the 1980s, there were no tools and very little language to identify or corroborate assault.

As a friend who went to high school in the 1980s posted on Facebook this week, what might have happened to Ford “happened all the time when I was growing up and no doubt still does.”

“This is such a common story,” she wrote. “This happened ALL THE TIME. What also happened all the time was that women who this happened to didn’t really talk about it much because, see above.” Whether Kavanaugh is confirmed to the Supreme Court or sent off to play endless rounds of golf, one thing we know is that women aren’t being quiet about this any longer. But in addressing sexual misconduct, we must also grapple with our past and understand that the experiences of women of a certain age group cannot be examined without historical context. We cannot dismiss claims with the lazy excuse that “that’s how it was then.”

In fact, in cases like Ford’s, there’s no excuse to resort to old victim-shaming tropes. We have the tools, now. We must use them.


Vanessa Grigoriadis is the author of Blurred Lines: Rethinking Sex, Power, and Consent on Campus, out October 2018, and a contributing writer at The New York Times magazine and Vanity Fair.





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