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The Poster For Colton Underwood's Season of The Bachelor Is Really…Something


Breaking news: Did you know Colton Underwood, the next Bachelor, is a virgin? I kid—there’s no way you could forget. Remember how his storylines on The Bachelorette and Bachelor in Paradise unfolded earlier this year? The shows constantly weaved in the fact that this hunky 26-year-old former football player was somehow still a virgin. He actually cried on one of the live specials as he recalled how he frequently lied about his sex life to his teammates, as if that was supposed to make us feel…sorry for him, I guess?

No shade to Colton’s tears—I just think his virginity is a weird quality to harp on because, truth is, it’s not a big deal. Some people are virgins, and some people aren’t. Just like some people pronounce caramel “care-a-mell” and others say “car-mul.” Both are fine, valid options. The same goes for your sex life. Colton is a virgin, not a serial killer.

And yet the reality series keeps playing the V-card for all it’s worth. Exhibit A: The first promotional poster for Colton’s season of The Bachelor, which is pretty standard minus one hilarious detail. Take a look at it for yourself, below:

See what I’m talking about? Colton’s tagline is the not-at-all-subtle, “What does he have to lose?” Get it? Because he’s a virgin? And he has to lose his virginity?

Here’s a new Bachelor drinking game for Colton’s season: Take a sip any time someone says the word “virgin.” Maybe play with soda, though, because at this rate it’ll be 500 times per episode—and it’s never a good idea to go that hard on a Monday.

The (Virgin) Bachelor premieres January 7 at 8 P.M. ET on ABC.

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We Can Stop Wondering About Carrie Underwood's Face Now


Singer Carrie Underwood performed her new song “Cry Pretty” at the American Country Music Awards last night—which doesn’t sound like breaking news until you consider that it was her first time in the spotlight since she took a serious fall last November.

And it wasn’t just any fall: The pop star broke her wrist, got cuts, and did enough damage to her face that it merited stitches. In a post to members of her fan club, she described the extent of her injuries: “In addition to breaking my wrist, I somehow managed to injure my face as well. I’ll spare you the gruesome details, but when I came out of surgery the night of my fall, the doctor told Mike [her husband] that he had put between 40 and 50 stitches in.” She followed up several weeks later, writing: “When I am ready to get in front of a camera, I want you all to understand why I might look a bit different.”

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It’s pretty clear from both her performance and an accompanying pre-show selfie she posted that her face isn’t all that different. But that’s not the point. Because in spite of this, people are losing it over the state of her face. Headlines call her post-surgery performance a “powerful return,” and one in particular offers a “complete guide” to what they call the enduring mystery of what happened to her face. And, naturally, Twitter is alive with the sound of people sharing their opinions on the matter.

As someone whose history with Underwood spans 717 plays of “Before He Cheats,” I’m in no place to speculate why she’d preemptively share the news of her facial injuries. But it does seem plausible—and understandable—that it may have been to prepare her fans (and curious onlookers) in the event that she did look different. That’s the prevailing theory on Twitter, at least. Imagine the speculation if she just showed up to the ACM Awards with a slightly different face and zero explanation. (Already, one commenter on a post surmised that she had an “upper lip lift.”) There’d be a Twitter thread about it by now.

It’s a uniquely female thing to have to endure the constant scrutiny of your body, clothing choices, and face on a day-to-day basis, and even more so when you’re a successful pop star. (Don’t believe us? There aren’t as many, if any, sensationalist stories tracking the history of Miles Teller’s facial scars, Harrison Ford’s chin scars, or Owen Wilson’s busted nose—nor “guides” about them.) Furthermore, this was the result of what Underwood herself called a “freak accident”—and despite the very real and painful-sounding injuries she sustained, everyone is primarily concerned with her supposed “disfigurement.” Translation: Whether or not she’s feeling okay comes secondary to what her face looks like. (To whit: There wasn’t a single article about how good her wrist looks. I mean, really, it did such a great job holding the microphone.)

So here’s the real mystery: Why do we care so much about Carrie Underwood’s face? We should just be grateful that, if her performance was any indication, the accident didn’t harm her vocal cords.

Related Stories:
–Watch Carrie Underwood’s Emotional Performance of ‘Cry Pretty’ at 2018 ACM Awards
–Having a Scar in Public Isn’t ‘Brave’
–Jameela Jamil: Talking About Body Positivity Means We’re Still Focusing Too Much on Our Looks





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Watch Carrie Underwood's Emotional Performance of 'Cry Pretty' at 2018 ACM Awards


In December 2017, Carrie Underwood revealed that she broke her wrist and severely injured her face after falling down the steps outside her home. The accident required Underwood to receive “between 40 to 50” stitches. “I’ll spare you the gruesome details,” she wrote in a blog post on her fan site about the accident, adding that she wasn’t “quite looking the same.”

“I honestly don’t know how things are going to end up but I do know this: I am grateful. I am grateful that it wasn’t much, much worse. And I am grateful for the people in my life that have been there every step of the way…It’s crazy how a freak random accident can change your life,” she wrote.

Now, four months after writing that post, Underwood took the stage at the Academy of Country Music Awards on Sunday night (April 15) to sing her new song “Cry Pretty.” This was her first time doing a public performance since the incident—and, naturally, she nailed it. So much so that the audience gave Underwood a long standing ovation. But the high points of the night didn’t stop there: Shortly after, she won Vocal Event of the Year with Keith Urban.

Watch a portion of Underwood’s performance, below:

Underwood’s kept a relatively low profile up until now. On April 4, she posted this photo of herself to Instagram, which many people took as her “revealing” her post-injury face for the first time.

Underwood has a very busy year ahead of her. “Cry Pretty” is the first single off her upcoming album, which is expected to drop later this year. On April 10, she wrote an open letter to her fans with updates about both her face and wrist injuries. “First off, physically, I’m doing pretty darn good these days! My wrist is almost back to normal, about 90 percent there…and the docs say that last 10 percent will come in time,” she wrote. “And my face has been healing pretty nicely as well. I definitely feel more like myself than I have in a while.”

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