From Oprah Winfrey as “The Titan” to Shonda Rhimes as “The Showrunner,” the women in TIME‘s new “Firsts: Women Who Are Changing The World” feature are shattering barriers and glass ceilings in their respective fields. Among the dozens of game-changers is Counselor to the President Kellyanne Conway. Her title? “The Adviser.” Her position is one that’s raised more than a few eyebrows, and questions, along the way—including ones from her daughters about why their mom didn’t support the first female presidential candidate from a major party. (Hillary Clinton, of course, is also included in the feature as “The Nominee.”)
In a video interview with TIME, Conway mentions that her gender was always a point of interest as she started a career in Republican politics 20 years ago. “There were few women consultants; there were few women candidates; there were certainly few women congressmen and officeholders,” she said. “I have described [it] as walking into the men’s locker room at the Elks Club, holding a bachelor party.”
Once she learned how to “think like a man and to behave like a lady,” as she put it—which speaks to just how much we need more women in politics, no?—she started to feel more comfortable in her role. But she was, and still is, a minority in politics. So it’s not surprising that her children wanted to know “why Mommy, who’s a woman, did not support the first female presidential candidate from a major party.”
“I would tell them that I respect very much that Secretary Clinton was running for president, and it showed that in this country anybody can do anything if they set their mind to it. At the same time, I tried to explain to them that you could be excited for someone with whom you disagree and share in that moment in history as a proud American,” Conway said. “We are making our own choices and really making history every day—but yet making history in the fact that we are increasingly in control.”
In an interview last year she told Glamour that, “I relish the idea of a female president in my lifetime. True feminism means you’re strong and independent enough to stand on your own. It motivates me to say that I’m for a woman, but not that woman. I’m like many American women in that we say Hillary Clinton shares our agenda but not necessarily our life experience, our vision, or our values.”
Instead, she’s supported Donald Trump throughout his many lies and sexual assault allegations—which, one day, might be a little harder to explain to her daughters.
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