We’re now five episodes deep in season two of Big Little Lies, and the lies are finally clawing their way to the surface. But you know what didn’t claw its way to the surface? The infamous ice cream cone scene, which was cut from last night’s episode.

Remember last year when photos of Reese Witherspoon launching an ice cream at Meryl Streep’s back tore through the Internet? Who wouldn’t? I mean, when an Academy Award-winning actor throws dessert at another Academy Award-winning actor, the world tunes in. In fact, I shouldn’t be asking if you remember those photos. I should be asking: Where were you when photos of Reese Witherspoon throwing an ice cream cone at Meryl Streep hit the internet?

I was excited to see how it would all unfold on Big Little Lies—but unfortunately, the highly-anticipated scene aired during last night’s episode and ends with Madeline (Witherspoon) simply leering at Mary Louise (Streep) while clutching her cone with a vice-grip. Yes, reader: HBO actually cut the cone throw. And now I have nothing.

I have over a decade left on paying off my student loans. I have a credit card bill that’s skyrocketing with no end in sight. I can barely afford to keep my healthcare. I endured a 6.9 earthquake this weekend that made me slither into my Amazon Prime cart and slam the purchase button on a pair of emergency radios. I’m just about prepped and ready for the apocalypse. In other words, I have one thing that I look forward to every week: watching Academy-Award winning women glare at their onscreen husbands on Sunday nights. I’d hoped the ice cream cone throw could bolster my spirits for at least a month; now, this injustice has made me do a lot of thinking.

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