Tag: Masturbation

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Masturbation During Pregnancy Is A Thing—I Would Know


Considering the various benefits of female masturbation, it should come as no surprise that pregnant women—especially those that see an increase in libido—continue to masturbate. Typically, some of those benefits include “relaxation, anxiety and stress reduction, and intimacy with a partner (such as during mutual masturbation),” says Dr. Millheiser.

During months when a lot of things may not feel so good—let’s hear it for morning sickness, fatigue, insomnia, anxiety, heartburn, hemorrhoids, constipation, and headaches—self-pleasure doesn’t need a justification. “I literally just masturbated because I was that horny during pregnancy,” says Angela, 38. “I probably did it every day during my third trimester and still had sex with my husband that night.” Sarah, 39, agrees. “During my second pregnancy, all of my appetites were increased,” she says. “I probably masturbated a couple of times a week, in addition to having sex with my husband.”

Is Masturbation During Pregnancy Safe?

In most cases, masturbating during pregnancy is perfectly safe. “In general, a woman cannot hurt the baby during masturbation,” Millheiser says. “However, placing sex toys inside of the vagina during masturbation should be avoided if conditions such as preterm cervical dilation, preterm premature rupture of membranes, vaginal bleeding, abnormal positioning of the placenta, or preterm contractions and labor are present.”

Hearing this came as a real relief. Before this pregnancy, I suffered a miscarriage. And like so many women, I questioned every little thing in fear that it might happen again. “I had suffered a miscarriage prior to my pregnancy and I knew that an orgasm was a ‘wee little contraction,’ so I made my ob-gyn swear on his life that orgasming wouldn’t make me lose this totally viable, healthy pregnancy,” says Sarah, 39. “I probably asked him nine times and didn’t even care if he and his nurses talked about the weird horny lady after I left my appointments.”

I know what she meant; when I masturbated early on in pregnancy, I could feel my uterus contracting and it freaked me out for sure—but since Millheiser confirmed that a woman cannot hurt the baby during masturbation, I tried to stress about it less. I also spoke to my own doctor about my situation—something that all pregnant women should do—who echoed Millheiser’s words.

Masturbating during pregnancy is a regular routine for me—and many other women. With as much as goes on in our bodies and minds during pregnancy, masturbating is something within a our control to make ourselves feel a little better. And, honestly, anything that helps me relax, quiet my anxious brain, and lets me fall asleep quickly is something I will certainly continue to do.

Irina Gonzalez is an editor and freelance writer based in Florida covering parenting, recovery, and Latinx culture. Follow her on Instagram @msirinagonzalez.





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Is Masturbation Healthy? A Neuroscientist Weighs In


Is masturbation healthy? When it comes to sex—which is already so taboo—talking about masturbation is one of the most uncomfortable of subjects. It’s one thing to admit to being sexual with a partner, but quite another to admit to taking pleasure into your own hands—literally and figuratively. Especially for women. But as a certified sex therapist and neuroscientist, I’ve got good news: masturbation isn’t just pleasurable, it’s good for you.

For years I’ve worked with people with anxiety, depression, or relationship issues, treated people with problems in the bedroom, and taught human sexuality courses (when I’m not busy conducting sex research as a neuroscience Ph.D.), and yet, I continue to be amazed about how uncomfortable people are when it comes to discussing sex in general and their own sexual health in particular. It isn’t unusual for me to have to reassure a talk show host who cautions me to be careful about what I say on the air since they don’t really “talk about sex” on their show. I think to myself, “What? you’ve had a show for decades that deals with health and lifestyle issues and you haven’t talked about sex?”

My work with couples and in the lab conducting studies has proved time and time again that pleasure isn’t just important but necessary—something I explore in my Glamour column Ask. Dr. Nan and in my new book Why Good Sex Matters—based largely on my research of the female orgasm, which can relieve stress, improve mood, reduce pain, boost immunity, and enhance self-esteem.

So, when someone asks me if masturbation is healthy, the answer is a resounding yes. Here’s why:

Do most people masturbate?

The short answer? Yes. The longer answer? More men do than women.

Despite the persistent taboo around masturbation, statistics show that in western cultures, most people do it. In the U.S., roughly 80 percent of women between the ages of 25-40 say they’ve masturbated at some point in their lives, with 50 percent of women between the ages of 18-24 reporting having masturbated during the past year.

Men tend to masturbate more often than women—largely because women are still shamed for being “too sexual.” If you group men and women together, nearly 76 percent of young adults between the ages of 25 and 29 report self-pleasuring over the past year

Is masturbation healthy?

I consider masturbation to be one of the best forms of self-care. Not only does it feel good, it’s good for you.

First, there are the physical benefits of masturbation. My research involved having participants masturbate to orgasm in an fMRI scanner to document how the brain responds to genital stimulation leading up to and culminating in the big O. We found that when you experience sexual pleasure, many areas of the brain receive more oxygen.

Sufficient oxygen is absolutely critical to healthy brain function, so the widespread increase in blood flow to the brain (particularly regions involved in sensation, movement, cognition, reward, and hormone production) make orgasm a great workout for nearly your whole brain. Orgasm triggers the release of a cascade of substances such as natural painkillers, stress relievers, and mood enhancers. Think of your brain enjoying a delicious cocktail of increased dopamine, (associated with reward and enthusiasm), endorphins (our own internally produced opioids promoting feelings of wellbeing), serotonin (calming), and oxytocin (facilitating bonding). The result is a health-promoting natural high.

A regular masturbation practice also has other benefits. When women learn to cultivate the pleasures of masturbation, we radically challenge some of the sex-negative notions pervading our culture. Rather than focusing on being a sex object for someone else, masturbation allows us to focus on being intrinsically sexual beings whose bodies are places of pleasure that exist at times just for us. It puts your pleasure first.

Are there side effects of too much masturbation?

Any behavior which becomes compulsive can become problematic. I have treated men whose masturbation practices have gotten out of control, causing physical and emotional distress, even interrupting their ability to go to work. These compulsive sexual behaviors appear less frequently in women, although they have been reported. In general, out of control sexual behaviors can result when people have trouble regulating their moods and use sex to self soothe.

The bottom line? By making a commitment to prioritizing your own pleasure though cultivating a regular masturbation practice, you will reap big benefits.

Nan Wise, Ph.D., is AASECT certified sex therapist, neuroscientist, certified relationship expert, and author of Why Good Sex Matters: Understanding the Neuroscience of Pleasure for a Smarter, Happier, and More Purpose-Filled Life. Follow her @AskDoctorNan.





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Best 7 Masturbation Tips for Women


Sometimes, masturbation is like scratching an itch—the desire is just there from the getgo. Other times, you have to create that itch. Even on days when you’re not desperately turned on, making time for masturbation has lots of benefits, from helping you explore your sexuality to relieving stress and even improving your health.

How do you take your arousal from 0 to 60, though? We asked the experts for their best masturbation tips for women to help you get your body and mind ready for sex, solo or with a partner.

1. Relax

Mental distractions are an incredibly common mood-killer. Thinking about what you need to grab at the grocery store or emails you need to send can all but destroy your arousal. To help quiet the running list of things to do in your head and get your attention on your body, Laurie Mintz, Ph.D., a psychologist and author of Becoming Cliterate, recommends a relaxing activity, like listening to music.

A bath or shower may be particularly helpful to get you into a sensual mindset, says Astroglide’s resident sexologist Jess O’Reilly, Ph.D.. “Scan your body starting at your feet, taking note of its texture and temperature and working your way up to your face,” she advises. Notice the slip of the soapy water against your skin, the soft heat of the steam on your face. “As you become more mindful of your body, you may find that your interest in self-pleasure increases.”

2. Exercise

You might not think of sweating it out at the gym as a particularly sexy activity let alone one of the experts’ go-to masturbation tips, but getting your blood flowing and your endorphins running “gets you into a more body-focused state,” says Mintz. After a particularly intense workout, take a moment to admire your strength and everything your body can accomplish. Sometimes showing yourself a little emotional self-love leads to showing yourself some physical self-love.

3. Adjust the temperature

Physical discomfort is not exactly a turn-on, so keeping the room at a comfortable temperature will help free you from distractions, says Mintz. Being warm and cozy isn’t just a matter of personal preference may—there’s actually research showing women are more likely to orgasm when wearing socks, potentially because they improve circulation.

4. Block out a special time

The thrill of getting caught may be hot under certain circumstances, but chances are, knowing someone might walk in any minute will be a mood-killer, says Mintz. Block out plenty of time when you won’t be interrupted so that you don’t feel rushed.

5. Watch an erotic video

Contrary to stereotype, research shows that women get very visually aroused, says Mintz. So, one of the easiest ways to turn yourself on is to watch porn. Check out these female-friendly porn sites or your favorite sexy movie scene.

6. Fantasize

Often, the most powerful libido aid is your own mind. “Some people can reach orgasm from fantasy alone,” says O’Reilly. Most women probably need a little more action but fantasies are still incredibly powerful. “As your mind wanders, the desire to touch yourself or turn on your favorite toy may heighten,” says O’Reilly.

7. Just go for it

You don’t necessarily need to be in the mood before you masturbate. Often, experiencing physical pleasure will get you in the mood, says O’Reilly. “Arousal doesn’t always follow desire; sometimes arousal, is what leads to desire,” she explains. “If you like the results of masturbating (e.g. relaxation, a good night’s sleep, pain relief, pleasure) but you’re not in the mood, consider putting yourself in the mood just as you might do with a partner.”



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