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Demi Burnett hasn’t exactly been known for her maturity on The Bachelor this season. After all, she did shame several fellow contestants for being older than Colton. But that doesn’t mean she deserved what we’ll call Pacifier Gate on tonight’s Women Tell All.

Let’s back up: Earlier in the season, Demi frequently interrupted Courtney’s time with Colton. So Courtney (or a producer, perhaps) decided that appropriate payback would be to bring a pacifier to WTA to make a point about Demi’s childish ways. But then, Courtney took things too far: When the women got into a back and forth about Demi’s behavior, Courtney walked over and attempted to shove the pacifier in Demi’s mouth. Demi reacted by throwing the pacifier back at Courtney and threatening to walk off the show.

“That was not OK,” fellow contestant Onyeka Ehie told Glamour after the show. “Don’t touch someone. If she threw it at her, that’s one thing. But she shoved it down her throat! What the f-ck is wrong with you?” Courtney, however, did not apologize and was allowed to remain for the rest of the taping.

After the incident, Demi spoke with Glamour about what happened and more. Read on.

Glamour: Can you even begin to explain what happened with Courtney and that pacifier stunt?

Demi Burnett: That was ridiculous, that was insane. She had to make some kind of statement tonight, and I thought maybe she could do it verbally. She had to resort to doing it physically, but whatever. It’s 100 percent not OK. It made her look terrible. The only reason I’m not more mad about it is because everybody knows how bad that was. Everybody can see for themselves. I don’t have time to spend on her, thinking about what she did and being mad over it and filing assault charges. I don’t have time for that.

Why didn’t producers remove her from the rest of the taping?

Demi: I am surprised. I don’t know. I thought maybe she would have some sort of repercussion for it. I don’t know. I was pissed. I was like, “Who let her do this? Who gave her the pacifier? Where’d she pull it out of?” But I agree, she shouldn’t have been allowed to stay. I totally agree with that. That’s not fair to do to someone. My initial instincts were to start swinging, but I was like, stop it, you’re an adult, just throw it at her. [Laughs]

What happened after the show ended tonight?

Demi: She won’t even look at me. I’d like to stare at her and wait for her to look at me, but she never will. It made me so angry. I was like, “Who the f-ck let her do that?” That’s not OK to do to someone. That’s not OK to allow someone to behave that way.

Rick Rowell

Chris Harrison alluded to Paradise as the next step in your Bachelor journey tonight, but were you hoping to be considered for The Bachelorette?

Demi: Yeah, absolutely. I think both of them are opportunities that could result in a relationship or more self-discovery, but it is slightly offensive when people are only thinking Paradise, Paradise, Paradise. They think I’ll be so fun there, but I have a better shot at finding somebody on The Bachelorette. I’d have more guys who would be loyal to me, whereas in Paradise a new girl could walk in at any second and they’ll just dump me and I’ll be hurt all over again. So, that’s just kind of the struggle there. But I’m open-minded, so we’ll see.

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When Cate Blanchett accepted the Style Icon Award at Monday night’s InStyle Awards, she made sure to thank the fashion titans she’s worked with throughout her career—like Nicolas Ghesquière, Stella McCartney, Sarah Burton, and Giorgio Armani—before praising women who are bold and commanding in their own personal styles.

“For me, the true icons of style, and I think there’s a bit of a theme emerging here tonight, it’s that for me it’s always those women who’ve been utterly themselves without apology—whose physical presence and their aesthetic is really integrated in a non-self-conscious way,” the actress said. “Women who know how they look, it’s not all of who they are but just an extension of that, and it’s about women who feel free to wear what they want when they want and how they want to wear it.”

But beyond commending fashion risk takers, Blanchett had some forceful words for anyone (cough men cough) who feels like they have a place to comment on a woman’s appearance in any sort of sexual way—remarks that seemed especially pertinent considering the onslaught of reports chronicling how pervasive sexual harassment and misconduct is across numerous industries.

“Women like looking sexy, but it doesn’t mean we want to f-ck you,” Blanchett said, before a brief political pivot. “No one says to Steve Bannon, ‘You look like a bag of trash. Do you want me to throw you out?’”

She continued, “But the comments that get said about what women wear on the red carpet—I mean. If you troll through those trolls on the Internet, just don’t.”

Sound advice on all fronts: Everyone should own their style; men, just because women dress sexy doesn’t mean they want to f-ck you; and you should never, ever look at what Internet trolls have to say. If we all took Cate Blanchett’s advice, world the would be a better place? Probably.

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