We’ve all watched and read about plenty of kinky sex ideas (we’ll never forget you, Fifty Shades of Grey), but how many of us really take those desires beyond the books we read and into our bedrooms? If you’re looking to shake things up, there are plenty of ways to do it. From the tame to the wild, we’ve rounded up the 31 best kinky sex ideas to try out.

1. Take it to a mirror.

The next time things are heating up, whisper in your partner’s ear just how sexy they look—and suggest you get an even better view. Lead them to a mirror and lean yourself in front of it, allowing them to enter you from behind or reach around to stimulate your clitoris. You’ll get to watch them enjoy themselves, and they’ll get a view of you from the back and front. It’s also fun to lean a mirror next to your bed, so you can watch as you get it on from different positions.

2. Talk dirty.

Turn up the heat on your dirty talk by describing the sensations you’re feeling, giving gentle encouraging directions, and telling them what you want to do to them before you do it. You may also find that whispering about how a touch feels or being forward with what you want enhances what you’re experiencing in the moment.

3. Get icy.

We’re not talking about the old cliché of popping an ice cube in your mouth before giving oral sex. (Though if that does it for you, by all means go for it!) Ice cubes are the cheapest sex toy around, perfect for trailing over your partner’s body when things get steamy for a chillingly good sensation.

4. Send a racy text.

Be as brave as your vocabulary permits. You can send a simple, suggestive message—”I can’t wait to touch you tonight,” for example—or something more bold, such as a step-by-step guide to what you’ll do to them the second they walk through the door. Need ideas? We’ve got ’em.

5. Tie them up.

Maybe you’ve backed off the idea of bondage because buying handcuffs or other restraints is just too freaky for you. If that’s the case, try something a little more subtle, like a tie or scarf. Playfully wrap it around their wrists and secure them to a chair and go down on them. Or, if you want a more submissive role, ask your partner if they’d like to tie you to the headboard and have their way with you. We’re guessing you’re going to get a resounding yes.

7. Use a blindfold.

You can take that same tie and use it as a blindfold, shielding your partner’s eyes from your next moves, or taking away your own sight while he or she goes to town on your body. When you block off one sense, your body intensifies its others. Touch will feel extra electric and surprising.

7. Nibble and bite.

Nibbling and biting during sex is a sign of passion. It’s a little naughty and a lot hot—the perfect way to show how turned on you are. While you’re making out, test the waters to see if your partner is okay with a little teeth by gently nibbling on their lip. You can also gently drag your teeth over your partner’s shoulders in between sensual open-mouth kisses on their skin.

8. Try ultra-relaxing foreplay.

Two words for you: naked massage. In these stressful times, we could all use some extra TLC so offer your partner a sensual massage. For this you need nothing more than the lotion you already keep by your bedside—and to be prepared for things to heat up quickly.

9. Dress up.

If you’re living your days in sweats, dressing up right before you get naked can be a good way to get yourself in the mood. And why not try a uniform? If you’re looking to get out of a rut, dressing up as a doctor or French maid could be a fun experiment.

10. Spank them.

Spanking can be hot. That being said, it’s best not to give a whop out of nowhere that will just startle your partner and kill the moment. Next time you’re having that kind of passionate, animalistic sex, give them a light smack on the butt cheek with an open palm. If they seem into it, you can spank them a little harder. Studies have shown that arousal raises our pain threshold, so get after it!

11. Or pull their hair.

Don’t underestimate the appeal of a firm tug on your partner’s hair. The next time they’re going down on you, run your fingers through their hair and get a grip. Give it a gentle pull and see how they like it. The trick to making it feel good rather than hurt is to grab a bigger handful hair.

12. Get loud.

Don’t be afraid to express yourself. There’s an incredible freedom in vocalizing what you want and how good you’re feeling—and your lover is definitely going to be all ears.

13. Let your partner watch you masturbate.

This definitely requires some boldness but putting on a show by letting your significant other watch you pleasure yourself can be deeply empowering. Look straight into their eyes while you do it, and it won’t be long before they’re begging you to let them take over.

14. Drip hot oil on your partner with a massage candle.

Don’t be scared: massage candles are safe and will not burn you. They’re specifically formulated to heat up and turn into a sensuous oil that you can rub all over your partner (just not inside your partner—it’s not meant to be used as lube). After the candle turns to liquid oil, blow it out and it will stay liquefied for 30 minutes, which is plenty of time to gently drip it onto your partner and give them a spicy rubdown.

15. Leave the windows open.

Engage in a little light exhibition by leaving the blinds open or the window cracked, depending on how far you want to take it. The chance that someone could see you—or maybe just hear you—makes things all the more exciting.

16. Experiment with role play.

There’s a reason role play is one of the most common sex fantasies: It gives you a chance to let loose and act in a way that you wouldn’t necessarily behave ordinarily, and that’s incredibly freeing. Whether it’s boss and secretary, doctor and patient, student and professor, or anything else, role play is a harmless way to live out a fantasy and get kinky.

17. Play with sex toys.

Hit up a sex shop or online sex store and stock up on naughty goodies. From edible panties to vibrators, there are plenty of options that will spice things up and help you get your freak on. Not sure where to start without getting a bunch of creepy ads? We’ve got you.

18. Try new positions.

We all fall into routines, even when it comes to sex positions. Shake things up. Need some ideas? We’ve got plenty of suggestions for creative sex positions.

19. Don’t forget the pleasure of oral sex.

Sometimes we get to the main event way too quickly—oral sex can be a great way to slow things down and prioritize your pleasure.

20. Get steamy in the shower.

Start things off (and maybe even finish them) in the shower. Just be careful of slippage.

21. Have some strap-on fun.

Getting a strap on and penetrating your partner is a whole new experience that switches up the dynamic and can lead to some sex sessions you’ll never forget. If you’re into the idea, talk to your partner. As always, healthy open communication is key.

22. Get a sex pillow.

Sometimes angles can make all the difference. With a sex pillow, all kinds of new angles become available and the same-old, same-old suddenly feels anything but ordinary.

23. Make a home movie.

Smartphones make it easier than ever to make an x-rated home movie. Even if you watch it once and delete it, you’ll always have the experience in your memory. Just make sure to keep digital safety in mind—and make sure any content stays exclusively on your phone.

24. Have anal sex.

Add another entrée to the menu: anal sex. With the right preparation and mindset, taking things to the back can be the kinky sex idea you’ll thank god you tried.

25. Watch porn together.

If porn is something you enjoy, why not watch it with your partner? Chances are your attention will quickly turn to each other rather than the screen, and the moans coming from the background will keep the mood ultra sexy.

26. Get down in public.

Whether it’s an elevator, in an airplane, or in the back alley of a bar, there’s something inherently kinky about getting it on where you’re not supposed to. To fake the feeling at home, do it in front of the window.

27. Forego panties.

This is one of those simple but effective kinky sex ideas: Just forget to wear your underwear and casually mention it to your partner. Or, better yet, take them off in the bathroom at dinner and when you return the table, discreetly hand them to your partner with a sly smile. Check please.

28. Have sex on your period.

Period sex doesn’t have to be off-limits. In fact, there are plenty of benefits to having period sex—including increased lubrication and heightened sensitivity. If you’ve never tried it before, or are worried about a mess, start in the shower.

29. Lounge in lingerie.

Wearing underthings that make you feel confident and sexy is the ultimate self-turn on. Even if you’re wearing nothing but sweats around the house, slip on something that makes you ready for action underneath—it will be a sexy surprise for both of you.

30. Find pleasure in the fridge.

Bringing food into the bedroom can be oh so hot. Make an ice cream sundae, but rather than top your vanilla confection with hot sauce or whipped cream, rub a dab on your lips or neck and ask your lover to lick it off. As things heat up, paint some of your other erogenous zones with deliciousness they’ll lap up with pleasure.

31. Did someone say threesome?

This is definitely one of the more wild kinky sex ideas, but we’ve got to include threesomes. Adding another player into your bedroom games can be a memorable adventure—just make sure to communicate with all parties involved, be safe, and find the right person.

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