In addition to being an accomplished lawyer, a style icon, and record-breaking author, Michelle Obama is also like another mother when it comes to dispensing extremely valuable life advice. On Saturday night (July 6) during the Essence Festival, she was at it again, sharing some of her thoughts on dating and marriage. Obama left the audience with some thoughtful advice about why women should find an equal who wants “you to win as much as you want them to win.”

The sage words came during a keynote conversation with CBS anchor Gayle King. The topic turned to marriage, and Obama quickly broke in with the philosophies that have helped her and Barack Obama through more than 26 years that have included two children and two terms in the White House.

“Marriage is a choice you make every day,” she explained. “You don’t do it because it’s easy. You do it because you believe in it. You believe in the other person.”

“And ladies and gentleman, that’s why it’s so important to marry somebody that you respect,” she continued, “It’s important to marry somebody who is your equal, and to marry and be with somebody who wants you to win as much as you want them to win.”

The idea, she said, has some parallel to sports. “My husband is my teammate. If we are going to win this game together, he has to be strong and he has to be okay with me being strong. I do not want a weak player on my team, nor does he. But sometimes, we accept weak in one another because it feels easy. And be cautious of the man or woman who wants just the easy person.”

As a couple, the Obamas have constantly shown they have an unbelievably strong handle on working together. There’s the sweet stuff, like social media tributes and Spotify playlists, but they’ve always spoken about being each other’s source of support and encouragement. Power-couple goals? You bet.

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