Lifetime kicks off a month of true crime biopics, featuring women with incredible stories, tonight with the premiere of Escaping the Madhouse: The Nellie Bly Story. Christina Ricci plays investigative journalist Nellie Bly, born Elizabeth Cochran Seaman, who went undercover to expose the horrendous conditions and treatment at the notorious Women’s Lunatic Asylum in Roosevelt Island. Without giving too much away, Bly undergoes treatment at the asylum and has no recollection of how she got there or who she really is.

If that’s creepy and disturbing, imagine what it was like for Ricci to play the role. “I had a really hard time with one of the scenes, because as a mother in real life it’s just horrendous [to see these women suffer],” she says. But it was important for Ricci to tell Bly’s story, even though she didn’t have an extensive knowledge of her previously. “I found it really interesting to see how we treated our poor and mentally ill. The whole point of studying history is to not repeat the mistakes we’ve made, so it’s important to understand that this was a reality for people.”

Even so, Ricci found herself looking for ways to leave such dark subject matter on set. “It’s natural defenses,” she says. “Your brain doesn’t want to think about terrible things, so [for me], if you just allow it to recover, my brain will go right to the adorable kitten nearby.”

In her nearly 30 year career, Ricci has certainly mastered the art of evolving and focusing on the positive. She says she’s grateful she didn’t grow up in the age of social media (“Thank God I was done with all my hard partying [by then].”) and that there’s now smarter roles for women in TV and film (“For a very long time, the things we were supposed to be in were so stupid”). But it hasn’t been easy either. Ahead of tonight’s premiere, she tells Glamour what she’s learned. Read on.

Glamour: How often do you watch your films when they come on TV?

Christina Ricci: It depends. We have Apple TV, so I’d have to go search for my own stuff. It’s been a long time that I’ve been like, “I really want to go and see that movie…” I think the last one we watched was Addams Family Values. I had to talk about it since it was being re-released for its anniversary, so I watched it again to familiarize myself with it.

My sister was adamant that I mention Now and Then, which is one of her favorites.

CR: I was in a bathroom recently with (co-star) Rita Wilson and didn’t say hi! I don’t think she recognized me. I looked at her, but she didn’t recognize me, and I totally forgot she was in that movie and that I worked with her until after. I should have just gone right up to her. When you’ve worked as long as I have, and I was a child then and am an adult now and such a different person, it’s hard to almost remember that you had contact with some people.

You’ve seen so much change through your career. What’s changed for you personally?

CR: I think there’s a real appreciation for intelligent filmmaking and seeing it reflected in movies and TV. For a very long time the things we were supposed to aspire to be in were so stupid. I had to pretend that I thought it was good, you know? So it’s nice now that you can actually say, “No, I want to be in something really smart, and I don’t care if only 10 people get it. I want to make art.” There seems to be real value to that now.

Is there anything you wish you could go back and tell yourself during your teen years?

CR: Yes, for sure. I would tell myself it’s all about the work I did and what I created, and nothing else mattered. I didn’t know that for a very long time, and I wish I had. I think it’s very confusing when you introduce a child to fame because fame is so warping. People clamor for and want it so badly. I think as a kid, you get confused, when really any adult should tell you, “No, it’s about what you create and the work you do. It’s about valuing yourself as an artist and not something to be put up for people to consume.” I didn’t understand that…I thought that I was meant for other people to consume. [But] I was a kid.

Is there anything you do now to make sure you don’t have to deal with the pitfalls of fame?

CR: I never really went out anyway. The thing is, I’m not naturally attention-seeking, but I tried to be that for so long because I thought I was supposed to be. It led to me doing a lot of things to cope to be this person that I wasn’t, and that caused a lot of problems. I think now just knowing you don’t actually have to [play that game], it’s not about fame, and it shouldn’t be about fame. If what you’re seeking is fame, you’re always going to be empty. It’s something I’m trying to teach my child because I think social media and all of this attention-seeking stuff is soul-crushing. I don’t want him to have to learn that the hard way.

Right. It’s become about the amount of followers you have.

CR: It’s very strange. It’s like taking the worst part of high school and making it [a profession].

Remember when actors would go out to clubs and it wouldn’t wind up on social media?

CR: I don’t know how these young actors aren’t getting into more trouble.

It’s why I think Netflix and chill became such a huge phenomenon. What else are people going to do?

CR: Well, it’s smart and thank God. Nobody needs to be embarrassing themselves. Somebody said to me the other day—and it’s kind of funny—they were like, “You were a part of the last group of young, famous people that were insane.” Because there was no one to cover it! So it was like the last hurrah of like throwing TV’s out of hotel rooms and stuff, you know? Because right after…I think the Internet hit when I was 22 or 23, and thank God I was done with all of my hard partying. [Laughs] It’s nuts.

Escaping the Madhouse: The Nellie Bly Story premieres on Lifetime on Saturday, January 19, at 8 P.M. ET/PT.

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