One year and a few months after the 2016 presidential election, Hillary Clinton is getting real about her experience running against now-
President Donald Trump—and on Saturday at the Teen Vogue Summit, she opened up about one moment in the second debate that no one’s likely to forget.

As Clinton and Trump faced off on October 9, 2016, and tackled subjects like ISIS and taxes, the then-Republican nominee personally attacked Clinton, saying she was the “devil” with hate in her heart and downplayed his lewd comments about women as “locker room talk.”

On top of the personal attacks, Trump snakily moved around the stage and aggressively stood too close behind Clinton as she spoke. Many women watching at home—who were well familiar with that feeling of discomfort when an aggressive male deliberately inserts himself in your space—wanted her to stand up to Trump right then. Instead, Clinton kept things professional.

Back to the present: On Saturday, Clinton told young audience members at the Playa Vista, California, summit what she really wanted to say at that debate and why she kept her mouth shut instead.

Given the timing of the debate, which came just after the infamous Access Hollywood tapes were leaked, Clinton knew Trump would be on edge and desperate to win the debate.

“So I said, ‘We have to be calm,’ and I maintained my composure,” Clinton said to Black-ish and Grown-ish star Yara Shahidi, who moderated the panel.

But the double standard that caused her to keep her mouth shut didn’t hit her until after the debate.

“I thought about that, and what would have happened if I spun around and said, ‘You love to intimidate women, but back up, you creep!’ I think it would have been really satisfying. But I also think given the way women are covered..they would have said, ‘She can’t take it,’ or, ‘We don’t want an angry woman in the Oval Office.’”

Clinton also briefly touches on the topic in her book, What Happened, and frequently contemplates what would’ve happened if she stood up for herself at the debate.

“It sure would have made for better TV,” she wrote. “Maybe I have over-learned the lesson of staying calm, biting my tongue, digging my fingernails into a clenched fist—smiling all the while, determined to present a composed face to the world.”

At the summit, she drew from her experiences during the debate—and over the course of her life—to dish some wisdom to those in the audience.

“We have to make it not only safe for women, we have to make it possible for us to express a full range of human emotion…without being so negatively judged,” she said. “Remember when he called me a nasty woman? All of that stuff he did didn’t end up hurting him that much because men are given a much broader range of emotions to demonstrate their authentic feelings.”

“Be part of the changing culture so it’s not viewed as disqualifying if you’re standing up for yourself and speaking up for yourself,” Clinton added.

Related Stories:
–Hillary Clinton’s New Book ‘What Happened’ Proves She’s Not Going Away—That’s a Good Thing
–Hillary Clinton Says Her ‘Skin Crawled’ When She Was Debating Donald Trump
–Watch Hillary Clinton Hilariously Practice How to Avoid a Hug From Donald Trump

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