We’re more than halfway through season two of Big Little Lies, and I have to ask: Who even are the men on this show? Did you know there were men on this show?

Last night the second annual Amabella’s birthday-party episode aired, and while I was struck by the glitz and glamour of the Monterey Five, dazzled by a Laura Dern monologue, and stunned by Nicole Kidman’s slapping Meryl Streep, I noticed something completely chilling: There are men on this show.

At first, I didn’t want to believe it. There I was sitting in my home, minding my own business, scrolling through Twitter while glancing at the TV to watch Zöe Kravitz dance like a tipsy mom at a block party, when it happened: I saw a tweet that read, “Marry, Fuck, Kill, Big Little Lies husband edition…go.” I thought, Husbands? And when I looked up at my television, I realized there was indeed a man on my screen. Yes, reader, a man on Big Little Lies.

I didn’t want it to be true, but I rewound, just to be sure, and there he was: that guy from Parks and Recreation who’s funny on Twitter, Adam Scott. He’s on Big Little Lies, a show that, until last night, I believed was about Academy Award–winning actresses staring into the sea. I considered this show a safe space, a place for women to talk about our patriarchy-induced traumas. A show that swept at the Emmys in 2017 for its layered and poignant illustrations of domestic violence and sexual assault.

Once I saw that men are allowed to be on Big Little Lies, I thought: But why? What for? What could any of these complex, beautiful female characters ever need from a man? It was like I was wearing lesbian goggles, and once I lifted them, I realized not one but all of the women on Big Little Lies are married to men—and not to each other. It was shocking.

Scott (the guy from Parks and Rec) plays Madeline’s husband. As far as I know, he doesn’t have a name; he’s the kind of husband I imagine straight women choose to be with because he’s barely even there in the first place, like furniture. He just fades into the background like a taupe chaise longue. This guy is sad because Madeline (Reese Witherspoon) had an affair with—get this—another man. He also has beef with Madeline’s ex-husband (a third man!) whose name is likely Joe or Bill, but who can be sure. Here I was thinking that Madeline was a single mother of two effervescent daughters, living a mystical life of a spritely sea witch in the cliffs of Northern California. I was so wrong. Had I just rubbed my eyes and squinted once, I would’ve noticed that this whole time there was male furniture in the background.

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