When I was growing up, I would always go to my cousin Mia’s beauty salon, A New You, in Seattle. For me it was more than a place to get your hair done; it felt like going to church. You could get your head right and your heart right all at once.

I used no-lye relaxers until I was 19. I remember my mom putting the solution on my bangs, which made them stand straight up. Then my cousin told me that my new hair growth at the roots flatironed better, so I stopped using the relaxer and grew it all out. I’ve been natural ever since. Now there are very few days that I’m not in the public eye, either on CNN or at events. When someone recently suggested that I shouldn’t wear my hair curly on TV, my response was, “For little black girls everywhere, I’m going to wear it curly!”

Here’s what I think people misunderstand about women of color and our hair: It has range—just like us. We don’t have to commit to only one style. Yet we’re typically portrayed a certain way in the media. There are people of color losing their lives in this country because people don’t get us, and you might say, “What does that have to do with hair?” I say: Everything.

Hair is another form of cultural misunderstanding. I thought wearing my hair on CNN in cornrows wasn’t a big deal. I didn’t think twice about it. But a number of black women responded, saying, “Oh my God, thank you so much for doing this. Now I know I can do this in a professional setting.”

A lot of people are just starting to accept that how black women wear their hair is a form of self-expression. I’m not going to do mine the same way every day—that would take away all the creativity and fun. After so much heat styling, though, my curls look more like loose waves. Because of that, I’ve been making an effort to protect them by using a no-suds shampoo by Hair Rules and working with my hairstylist, Johnny Wright (he used to do Michelle Obama’s hair), to occasionally incorporate extensions or wigs so there’s no need for heat-styling or tugging. Johnny is the genius behind the range of looks you see me rock on TV and on Instagram, everything from braids to straight hair to ringlets.

When people ask my advice about wearing their natural hair, my response is always the same: Do you. If someone is not allowing you the space or respect to simply do what you want with your hair, you’re going to be restricted in so many other ways. Don’t be afraid to stick up for yourself. And you know I’ll be doing my part to continue to empower my sisters so that they can wear their hair exactly how they want to.

This story originally ran in the October 2018 issue of Glamour.

Related Stories:
–This Meteorologist Had a Powerful Response to a Complaint That Her Hair Wasn’t ‘Normal’
–Sanaa Lathan: ‘Natural Hair Is Beautiful, but It Should Be a Choice’
–Lupita Nyong’o Says Women Are Still ‘Shunned’ for Their Natural Hair

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