When Jennifer Aniston and Justin Theroux announced their divorce earlier this year, their joint statement stressed it was a “mutual” and “loving” decision. “We are two best friends who have decided to part ways as a couple, but look forward to continuing our cherished friendship,” it read. “Normally we would do this privately, but given that the gossip industry cannot resist an opportunity to speculate and invent, we wanted to convey the truth directly.”

But, of course, wild rumors spread anyway. Sources claimed they were breaking up because of infidelity, because Theroux’s party lifestyle was too much for chill Aniston, that she wanted a child. (Aniston herself had to shut down that last one.) Throughout these reports, Theroux remained silent about the relationship’s end…until now. In his first in-depth profile since the divorce, with The New York Times, he opens up about his life with Aniston.

“It was heartbreaking,” Theroux says of the split, “only in the sense that the friendship would not be the same, as far as just the day to day. But the friendship is shifting and changing, you know, so that part is something that we’re both very proud of.”

Theroux also echoed the divorce statement, saying the whole thing was very amicable. “The good news is that was probably the most—I’m choosing my words really carefully—it was kind of the most gentle separation, in that there was no animosity,” he says. “In a weird way, just sort of navigating the inevitable perception of it is the exhausting part.”

As for why they broke up, Theroux remains pretty vague. At one point in the interview, though, he cites the “carny lifestyle” that comes with being an actor and the frequent separations it causes.

“Again, neither one of us is dead, neither one of us is looking to throw hatchets at each other,” he says. “It’s more like, it’s amicable. It’s boring, but, you know, we respected each other enough that it was as painless as it could be.”

Since the divorce, he’s moved to New York City from Los Angeles and stars in Netflix’s new series Maniac. But is he dating? “Is this the part where I coyly raise an eyebrow and not answer the question?” (So, he’s probably-definitely dating.)

Related: These Jennifer Aniston and Justin Theroux Relationship Rumors Are Out of Control

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