Unfortunately, the audience wasn’t able to get that information, and it maybe came off like, “Why is Peter making this decision?” I trusted Victoria, and there’s more personal stuff to it that will stay between the two of us. I learned a lot about Victoria, especially in the fantasy suite, and that made me feel confident about [choosing to believe her].

Have you talked to Merissa since the season ended?

No. No communication.

So let’s talk about Madison then. Did you ever ask her why she would go on The Bachelor knowing that sex is often a very big part of it?

I haven’t talked directly to her about that, but I never once held anything against her. That definitely made it very difficult week for me, no doubt about that, but her expressing her views and having to share what was on her heart with me was always in her right to do. It’s never too much for me, and I understand.

There are so many conspiracy theories about what happens on your finale. Chris Harrison even said, “If you think you know what’s coming, you don’t.” So why hasn’t it been spoiled?

I don’t know. I think when I made that statement [earlier this year that it wouldn’t be spoiled], I was just throwing it out there. I’ve truly believed it. I thought there was a reason that it wouldn’t be spoiled. But I’m even a little shocked just with the day and age we live in, social media and whatnot. It’s an insane ending, it is. And it’s the hardest last week of my life. So that’s really all I can say about that.

But then we have Chris saying that you don’t even know how this is all going to end. So are you terrified the “After the Final Rose” special will be just as difficult?

I wouldn’t say terrified because I can honestly say where I’m at right now, I am very happy. I say it over and over, but I followed my heart the entire time. A lot of people, I think, will be surprised. There’s a lot of unexpected stuff that happens up until the very last second, that’s for sure. I think that’s why it’s not been able to be spoiled. Soon everyone will know.

My personal theory is that it’s either Madison or Hannah Brown at the end. Because when your mother says, “Go back and get her,” it seems she’s referring to a relationship she’s invested in. Obviously, she met Maddie in the very beginning of your season and knows Hannah.

Right. I think that’s a very fair theory. My mom is very emotional, and she can’t hide her emotion at all. She definitely has opinions that she feels like she has to get across to me. I know it only comes from a place of love. She’s my biggest fan.

And she doesn’t even know how this season ends?

You guys will have to tune in to see.

You are so well media-trained. I can’t imagine how hard this has been not to say anything. [Laughs.]

It’s very hard. The finale is crazy. That’s all I can say. [Laughs.]

This interviewed has been edited and condensed for clarity.

The Bachelor two-night finale airs Monday, March 9, and Tuesday, March 10, on ABC. Jessica Radloff is the Glamour West Coast editor. You can follow her on Instagram @jessicaradloff14.

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