Vincent Wildcat serves as one of the firekeepers, who will keep the flame burning during the four-day vigil. (Zoe Todd/CBC)
“These horrors are the reality of what Canada is built upon, and it’s important for us to start having conversations about these to deal with the effects,” said Rob Houle, the supervisor of Edmonton’s aboriginal relations office.
The city has partnered with Confederacy of Treaty 6 First Nations to host panels on the experiences of residential school survivors. There will
When Mary Jane Mitchell stood in the shadow of City Hall on Sunday afternoon, she couldn’t ignore the “ugly feeling” in the pit of her stomach.
A feeling she has carried for decades — the pain and anger left over from a childhood spent in a residential school. A place, she said, where she faced daily abuse and discrimination. Memories she has kept with her long after she left its walls.
“My life was not what it should have been,” she said.
Decades later, she joined residential school survivors across the city to mark the end of the Truth and Reconciliation Committee. The committee, struck in 2009 to explore and expose the abuses in Canada’s residential school system, will release its final report on Tuesday.
Mitchell, 59, and other survivors gathered around a ceremonial fire in front of city hall Sunday afternoon. For the next four days, the fire will burn, giving survivors and their families a place to gather to share their stories of abuse.
Vincent Wildcat serves as one of the firekeepers, who will keep the flame burning during the four-day vigil. (Zoe Todd/CBC)
“These horrors are the reality of what Canada is built upon, and it’s important for us to start having conversations about these to deal with the effects,” said Rob Houle, the supervisor of Edmonton’s aboriginal relations office.
The city has partnered with Confederacy of Treaty 6 First Nations to host panels on the experiences of residential school survivors. There will also be a livestream showing events in Ottawa marking the commission’s closing ceremonies.
Houle said the hope was to provide survivors a comfortable space to recount their own stories.
“Being part of a ceremony like that … always will bring out emotions. There were people weeping tears of joy, of sorrow, of experience,” he said.
Vincent Wildcat is one of the firekeepers, who will keep the fire burning over the four days. He said he is willing to stay as long as it takes, to make sure others have a place to talk about their own experiences.
“If they need to shed some tears, to release something that way, that’s part of the meaning of this,” he said.
“Hopefully, it will bring better futures for all of us.”
For Mitchell, the pain comes not only from her time in the school, but also what followed: years of alcohol and drug addiction, abusive relationships and homelessness.
Decades later, she’s still angry about what happened to her. When she arrived at the ceremony Sunday, she wasn’t sure she was ready to take part.
“I thought, ‘OK, fine.’ (Someone) gave me a cigarette, I put it in the fire and I say, ‘Lord, forgive me for my angry spirit. I’m sorry – help me with this,’ ” she said.
“I feel a certain amount of freedom inside. I feel I’m able to go on with my life.”
Mitchell was able to change her life. Married now and sober for 36 years, she called her marriage the “first relationship I can hold on to and be proud of.” She is a grandmother and has reconnected with her two daughters, who were taken from her care when she was a young mother.
Still, it wasn’t until now that she felt ready to fully confront what happened, and start to try to forgive those who abused her in the residential school — because she’s not willing to live with that anger anymore.
“I can’t go around with a bitter heart and expect to be part of society. I need to forgive,” she said.
“I want to heal, I want to forgive.”
